I think you're the first noob i have ever really hated, starting now.
Why the fuck didn't you hate me when I did this at the old i-mockery?
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Gas and masturbation are highly unlikely to be connected with each other. Have you tried to stop masturbating? Has the gas subsided as a result? Perhaps you could try the same experiment by increasing the times you masturbate daily. Do you notice that the gas is increasing?