Advice column hilarity.

[Kitsa]

Dear Prudence,
Recently my mother, who was my best friend, passed away suddenly at a fairly young age. A few weeks later, my fiance abandoned me a month prior to our wedding because he couldn't handle my grief. He belittled my mother's death, called my father a drama queen for his despair, and accused me of not paying attention to his needs. During the final stages, he depicted me as irrational and needy to our mutual friends. By looking through his e-mails, I have discovered some things about him that I have kept silent about. Most important was my discovery of a sex-doll perversion. He is part of a group that learns how to make dolls at home. (There are also videos of men doing questionable deeds with Barbies.) In addition, he communicated with escort services and through online personal ads for bondage enthusiasts. My problem is that in my anger about his behavior and timing, I feel a strong compulsion to send this information to almost everyone in his contact list. Could you please talk me out of it, since I would very much like justice to be served?
—Steamed





Dear Steamed,
You were just rescued from a future in which you come home to find your husband violating your daughter's American Girl doll collection! Stop being angry and start being grateful. Consider that in the great cosmic scheme of things, this was your mother's final gift to you. Her loss made it possible for you to find out what a thoroughgoing creep you almost ended up with. Don't worry about what your friends might think. If they took the side of a man who said he dumped his fiancee a month before the wedding because her grief over her mother's unexpected death was bumming him out, then you need a new group of friends. You don't want to wallow in his gutter by sending out a mass e-mail telling them that if he ever gives a homemade doll to any of their children, they should make sure to wipe it down with Germ-X first. Stop looking for retribution, and sing "Hallelujah" that you made it out before you set up a new household with him, only to find out he preferred playing house.
—Prudie