Features

Mockery · #1

It's been a damned long time since his last visit, but the good Doctor Bactine has finally returned to answer some extremely important medical questions. Whether he'll return again soon remains to be seen, but at least you can take in some more knowledge from that backwoods medical genius for the time being.

THE RETURN OF DOCTOR BACTINE!
http://www.I-Mockery.com/DoctorBactine

Enjoy!

-RoG-

Matt Harty · #2

Quote:

My friend is obsessed with chickens. How can I make him hate chickens?
-Chicken Hater

Become a chicken, Johnny I don't know what a medical question is.

LOL :/

Anonymous · #3

That was good, Neo.

glowbelly · #4

DOCTOR I CAN WALK IN THE WATER AND MULTIPLY BREAD SLICES! WHAT IS HAPPENING????
-JC

Anyone can walk in water, JC. It's called wading. If you couldn't, that might be a problem. As for the multiplying bread slices, it's abnormal. The good news is, I can treat a yeast infection.

noob3 · #5

was getting undressed today, and I realized I had a horn in the middle of my chest. I tried to cut it with a chainsaw, but firey sparks jumped everywhere and my head turned ablaze, leaving me four-degree burns. What should I do?
-Belaus

Here's the thing, Scooter, it's been a while since I was in med school, but back then there were only three degrees of burns. Beyond that I can only say dellusions are normal in Tertiary Syphillis so there's nothing to be concerned about here.

the question made me laugh hard

SMN · #6

Methinks that The good doctor hates me, or he had too many visits to Mr. Daniels.

HickMan · #7

IT'S 'BOUT BLOODY TIME.

Thanks, RoG.

Anonymous · #8

Man. Homestar, Ghost Rider, FLAMES, Squigly, and a leet-speak reference, all in one package! When did you GET so cool?

SMN · #9

just now I guess. (don't diss the siggy)

Anonymous · #10

To be fair, your signature does suck the high, hard one.

SMN · #11

what do u suggest? I'm open to change!

Rongi · #12

I suggest you stick your fingers in the garbage disposal and then proceed to bash your head on the pavement.

But that's me.

noob3 · #13

that's me too i suggest he dies aswell die die die

mburbank · #14

Why does milk go bad in the carton, but not in the cow?
-Ryan Kitchens

You know Ryan, I asked a cow that very same question once and you know what he told me? "MIND YOUR OWN GODDAMNED BUSINESS!"

That Doc Bactine is one funny son of a bitch.

Anonymous · #15

i need a prescription for pleasure units.

Command Prompt · #16

I just read your minimock an hour a go.

For the past hour I have been screaming at the top of my lungs and banging my head against the tile in my shower hoping that would get the images out of my head.

Right now I'm seriously thinking of drilling a hole in my head and stabbing randomly, hopefully hitting the locus that has unfortunatley chemically stored the image of your chubby body in tight revealing pink clothing.

I know you did that for EXACTLY this type of attention, but I have to say that is the single handedly most disturbing fucking thing I have EVER EVER seen.

Congradulations, I love it.
You owe me a meal at taco bell.