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Protoclown · #1

Does anyone know how to stop time?

Professor Cool · #2

Put your head in the oven with the gas on...

Cybernetico · #3

You don't have to TELL anyone that

:P

The_voice_of_reason · #4

Sure, all you need is a black hole.

Generator86 · #5

Being 26 sucks shit. I've been this age for close to six months, and nothing good has happened. Then again, that might be because I'm simply a totally useless bastard with nothing to offer the job force.

I'd rather blame God, Buddha, Alllah, whoever, but that's too much work. :badreligion Watcho!

executioneer · #6

lol voiceofreason is a NERD

-willie

Les Waste · #7

I got an A in my physics of Astronomy class and I learned A LOT about black holes.

Time actually moves slower when gravity is greater, even by a small amount. A clock in the basement of a building will move slightly slower than a clock on the tenth floor of a building, even if it is just barely.

My solution? Dig as deep a hole as you can possibly dig and live there.

Evil Robot · #8

My recipie fer stopin the age'in process involves a huntin accident.

tenno · #9

clowns dont age proto, GACY taught us that.

Anonymous · #10

That reminds me of the dream I had last night where it was Stallone in Demolition Man and they were about to cryogenically freeze him and he pissed off one of the German attendants and that guy started peeing in his freezing fluid, so like years later they hook up his cube to a machine that lets them hear him talk and he was all like 'AAAH IT'S SO HOT IN HERE CAUSE THAT GERMAN DUDE PISSED IN HERE AAAAAH' and he tricked them so he got defrosted and then went psycho sick and started choppin' necks and he foudn that chick that likes him in the movie but they got caught and got all tied up for the chambers again when another couple (WITH THE CHICK IN THAT COUPLE PLAYED BY ME) showed up and when we got thrown to the ground my left arm strap came loose so I untied everyone and we ran and escaped to a train but some officers came by but we escaped by telling them we were other people and it turns out my boyfriend stole his name from some local clown/ice cream salesman so anyway after defacing the ads at the train stop we escape into the sewers and were bein chased so we fell over a ledge like three stories into the lowest level where we found a bunch of famous rappers and basketball players everyone thought was dead and one kid from high school I knew and we all had fake soldier 'letters-to-home-if-we-die' and stuff but mine had a bag with it that had my pop'ndeth wallet and license holder and it turned out like everyone there had already bought the license holders and i was like OMG and then the police came again but this time we all stood real still and they thoguht we were dead or something and went away so i looked back in my stuff and found a really old and big boombox and I was like 'anyone know what this is?' and a guy's like 'oh, i know! it's a 3-track player!' (LOL CAUSE IT'S IN THE FUTURE AND HE'D NEVER SEEN ONE BEFORE) so after i correct him i set it up for him and then hook up my laptop and play some club music but between cds the dude jacks my rhymes with some disney songs and i'm like GRRR >: and then that kid i knew from school, jordy, hooks up a big tv to the 'outdoor' channel, where it acts just like a window even though there's already a window right there showing the coastline, so we throw crap out of the window and watch it on the tv, and eventually he throws himself out the window and falls like literally ten stories and misses the ocean but gets up because he's ok!

and ice cube is like 'dag'

Cybernetico · #11

O_o

It's true, we could freeze you

and smash you into bits!

Anonymous · #12

u weren't payin attention

i am the hot chick that dint get frozen

NIGhtMAre · #13

guy girls. dman man make up your mind!

Anonymous · #14

Thank you for adding to this discussion

pickleninja · #15

Quote:

Originally Posted by Protoclown

Does anyone know how to stop time?

Sure, just send $500 in cash to Jesus. No checks accepted.

Mockery · #16

Meh, 26 has been boring so far. I'm looking forward to 27 because, as we all know, your life completely changes any time you become 1 year older.

Protoclown · #17

You don't get it man

DEATH IS COMING 8-)

Mockery · #18

Eh, he's already come around a few times. All he really wants is to mooch off our food. :/

Sethomas · #19

Eh, I'm going to be 19 soon. That's definitely the worst of the teenage years to be. I wish legal drinking and retirement would come already.

18 TILL I DIE!!! :Bryanadams

Rongi · #20

Quote:

Originally Posted by pickleninja

Sure, just send $500 in cash to Jesus. No checks accepted.

LOL U SO FUNNY

HickMan · #21

You can do plenty of things at the age of 27. Go Have a keg party... Because you can. Death is not near you till another 50+ years. Like in Ferris Bueller's Day off. "life's pretty short. If you don't stop and look at things. You might just miss it." Or something like that. You're almost 27 be happy. Get laid, get drunk and get in a car wreck. Thin year 27 will be very good.