Mar 29th, 2003, 08:53 PM
Welcome to High School Confidential!!
Did this REALLY need a poll? For Christ's sakes, if you need advice, READ THE POSTS.
Alright, from what I can gather here....
I would be concerned if I were you about his ex suddenly calling. Was it just a sudden call? Does she call him regularly? It sounds fishy to me. For that matter, if they only dated 3 months, why would she care SO MUCH that ANYONE was over at his house? No ex of mine ever cared if I had a girl at my house after we'd break up, not even if she hated the girl I had over. The best case scenario is that she is stuck on him and jealous (I HATE DRAMA QUEENS LIKE THIS) or worst case, he's seeing her behind everyone's back and she, as the jealous secret girlfriend, got wind of the fact that a girl that liked him was over at his house and called to bitch about it.
My BIGGEST gripe... why did you have sex with him?!? Before you take offense, I'm NOT calling you a slut (once you get out of high school, the term is FAR less "black and white") but if you're really so attached to this guy, ie willing to fuck him, and you sound like you're attached to him enough to do it again, how's that going to affect YOU if his ex succeeds in getting him back? I always avoided this situation by making sure I knew I cared about the girl enough to date her for awhile and that the feeling was mutual before I did anything as minor as kissing her, because I even view kissing as an intimate thing at least on my part, and I almost go out of my way NOT to hurt anyone's feelings (unless I'm getting revenge on someone, I'm not known for being able to forgive and forget). So one of these days, there's that possibility that shit could blow up, she could find out, and she could either turn him against you and/or find out y'all had sex, talk him into thinking he made a BIG mistake, and then, if you think they were "mean" to you before, it's going to get a LOT worse.
So the best advice I can give you is to slow the hell down. Keep letting him know you have feelings for him if you must, and if you feel it necessary to be affectionate do so, but keep tabs (and I don't mean stalking him or anything) on how things are going between him and his ex, and DO NOT have sex again unless you're sure that he wants you and only you, all it's going to do is make you feel that much shittier if things DO go wrong. Because you did have sex, I can't offer you advice that will make EVERYTHING work out, it's more like Damage Control. That and the fact that you are still in high school (which doesn't make "love" less real, just a lot less LIKELY) is a major factor too. The BEST thing you can do in high school (and I really wish someone was there to tell ME this back then) is to enjoy yourself, date but don't take it so god damn seriously, you're not planning on getting married yet are you? The whole point of dating is to find someone you want to be with for a long time, to get to know the other person well over time. Then you decide if things will work out in the long run or not. Why do you think your parents might yell about waiting until at LEAST your mid-20s to get married? Because love is ALWAYS fickle until BOTH people are mature enough to handle it/ Good luck, and let me know how it turns out. I'm sorry if things don't work out, but such is life, especially in your teens.
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