Features

BlueOatmeal · #1

I was leaving my apartment when I realized I didn't have my car keys so I went back upstairs to get them but I locked my door

. Now I would have gone to the landlord's office but they close at 5 and it was 6:30 at the time

.

So like a stone cold burglar I busted into my room with a Wendy's card.

Terra · #2

it would have been way cooler if you used your tomato crate reclyner and made a bunch of noise.

BlueOatmeal · #3

No. That would have been the opposite of cool.

Fathom Zero · #4

You didn't almost break your neck like I did.

Blue Fox · #5

GASP! Did you steal anything?

MarioRPG · #6

I had to jimmy my window open once and craw though to land in the sink. And then I discovered I left my back door wide open.

FartinMowler · #7

So you broke into your apartment, put on a dress, masturbated to a picture of Brian Dennehy

and tried cover it up with this story

Blue Fox · #8

one time i lived in a really crappy house with only a bolt lock on the door.

someone actually decided it wold be a good idea to use it i guess and george and i (and i think my sis Tues.) got stuck outside (they had left out the back door that had a lock).

Anyway, aparently whoever had done it had left the window open and so i had to stand on george's shoulders and haul myself through it (it was like 8 ft up)

It wasn't exactly conforting to know a tall guy and a child was all it took to break into my house