You love your ride, but chances are high that you could love it more if it was PIMPED. Most people don't know the proper way to pimp their ride. Only the few that do can turn any drab ride into a well oiled sex magnet. Take my words to heart and feast your peepers on this how-to guide on pimping your ride.
For this Pimping, we selected the A-Team Van. This van is a sight to behold but it could use a little extra TLC to really spiff it up.
Here's a pic of the A-Team Van on the way to the Body Shop:
Before we make any modifications to this beauty, we had to see what she had under the hood:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZVcO6ONPCM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAVnVB4IIX4
I bet you've never seen so much power underneath a hood.
1. First, take a good hard look at your interior. It's probably sporting ripped up seats, crappy carpeting. Start with your interior before you do anything else. Here's the interior of the A-Team Van:
Notice how Pimp it already is? There was no need to Pimp it out Xtreme style. Instead, we settle for these slight modifications which we will get to at the end of the show.
2. The exterior of your ride is the first thing that people see. It's also the most important. Even if you decide to neglect the interior completely, you can still give the appearance of a top Pimped ride if you do the right things to the outside. We decided to not only jazz up the outside of the van, but to add speed holes as well. Make sure you use proper tools when Pimping your ride:
Not bad, huh? The speed holes also give the appearance that your ride just returned home from two consecutive tours in Iraq. We'll return to the exterior in just a moment
3. If your ride didn't come with a sunroof and you don't want to spend hundreds of dollars to get it professionally done, you can simply Pimp it yourself. Using the straight end of a standard crowbar (remember, always use the right tools!), we created a great looking sunroof perfect for that warm sunny breeze:
4. Back to the exterior. Remember the speed holes? Well, we had a change of heart and decided to make several speed holes into one giant one for increased performance and visual flair. Now, awestruck strangers can see how pimped your ride is, outside [
and inside!
But we didn't stop there. We got bold and went even further, using seat belts strapped to a Suzuki Escudo to tear away at the side of the car. Here's the finished product:
That's how you Pimp a ride!
5. Think we're done yet? Not quite. You can have all the bells and whistles in your ride, have the sweetest rims and paint job, but it doesn't stand up to how precious your life is. That's why we decided to perform a rigorous safety test by strapping a seat belt to the tow bar of the Escudo and buckling it into a seat belt on the backseat of the A-Team Van. The results were what we expected:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ubRGgM6cTMQ
The strap snapped under the pressure but the locking mechanism held strong and did it's job.
Well there you have it. If you follow these steps, you're sure to get at least a B-cup mashed into your face.
You are probably wondering what we did to the exhaust. Everyone knows that in order to have a pimp sounding car you have to upgrade the exhaust. We upgraded our exhaust by putting the car jack directly under the car and taking gold swings at the muffler. Sparks sure flew with each hit and after a couple of wacks the exhaust had a pimp throaty sound.
We also did some slight modifications to the interior, and a few more finishing touches to the exterior. They consisted of:
-putting cigarettes out on the seats and doors
-jumping up and down repeatedly on the roof
-throwing rocks at the doors
-breaking the windshield wipers and cracking the windshield
-smashing the rear speakers with a crowbar
-breaking the rear wiper and rigging the wiper fluid tube to spray wiper fluid at cars behind you that moments before cut you off
-burning the carpeting with a lighter
-using a hunting knife to stab and tear up the seats
These minor upgrades add alot to your ride but aren't necessary.
The A-Team Van was officially pimped. Before we could close the book on it, we had to test out the new and improved ride one more time.
Pimp My Ride was brought to you in part by Giovanni Rims, Perelli Tires, Toyota, and West Coast Customs.
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