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The One and Only... · #1

Removed for security reasons.

Big McLargehuge · #2

She doesn't like you, move on before it is too late.

The One and Only... · #3

I'm just curious as to how you're inferring that.

Then again, me asking people on I-Mock for serious advice is about as sound as asking Marissa and Cortney what my chances with this girl are...

Big McLargehuge · #4

.
Lauren: oh sorry...yeah i don't really think so...i mean its still early to tell i'm more of a last minute person
(translation= NO)

OAO3405: Yeah, a lot of times I am too.
(Translation= IM COOL TOO)

OAO3405: It still puzzles me that you don't have a boyfriend. Can't you get pretty much whoever you want?
(Translation=Please love me)

Lauren: haha aw that's sweet...but i dont' think it really works that way, though it would be nice if it did
(Translation= YOU ARE A FUCKING CREEP)

OAO3405: If you say so. Lemme guess, haven't found the right guy?
(Translation= PLEASE PLEASE LOVE ME)

Lauren: yeah i dont' know...maybe....but i'm really focused on my grades right now
(Translation= NO)

OAO3405: Ah... I see.
OAO3405: Well, I think I better get offline... I've got a headache that's been killing me for an hour anyways. Later.
(Translation= IM TOO COOL FOR YOU TOO)

Lauren: alright well i'll talk to you later...hope you feel better...bye!
(Translation= JUST FUCKING DIE ALREADY)

You are still young, just don't think about it and someday you will get it. And subsequently shoot yourself.

The One and Only... · #5

You do realize that we are pretty friendly towards one another, right?

Fucktard.

adept_ninja · #6

no he is right. She isnt into you, you can tell

Big McLargehuge · #7

Hey man, i am just trying to help no need to call me names, but hey at least this girl can type in complete sentences. Your sicko little obsessions are starting to get directed at semi-intelligent people.

For some honest advice, sit back, relax. You are in highschool, smoke a joint with your friends, go out and have a beer. Don't think about it and this shit will work itself out. You can't expect to go straight from no human contact to Rico Suave in a matter of weeks. Get to know people and you will finally figure them out. It will blow your fucking mind. Take my word, i used to be almost as pathetic as you.

Lotida · #8

I have to admit that Big Mclarge pretty much summed up that conversation OAO. I don't think she is into you....sorry. Don't kill yourself though.

You do come across as a bit of a stalker personality.

The One and Only... · #9

Stalker? How?

I asked for the girl's s/n in person; she gave it to me. It's not as if I tracked it down from another source.

CLICK9 · #10

From a girl's perspective, she doesn't like you romantically. She thinks you're a nice person, but doesn't want to seem mean by rejecting you outright. She would have said, "sure, let's hang out!" if she wanted to. Sorry.

MLE · #11

Quote:

OAO3405: I was just wondering if you were doing anything special over the weekend. The reason I'm asking is because you signed off right after I sent it... I figured your connection screwed up or something.

First off, saying 'special' in there tells her you like her. In that way.

Quote:

OAO3405: So... are you?
Lauren: oh really? i'm sorry....when did you send that? today?

If she was in any way interested, she would have responded here already.

Quote:

OAO3405: I'm more interested in your answer to my question.
Lauren: oh sorry...yeah i don't really think so...i mean its still early to tell i'm more of a last minute person

Or here. If you actually read what she said, she said she didn't plan on having plans yet.

Quote:

OAO3405: Yeah, a lot of times I am too.
OAO3405: It still puzzles me that you don't have a boyfriend. Can't you get pretty much whoever you want?

This is a dead giveaway. She now no longer has a sneaking suspicion that you like her. This is a huge flashing red light.

Quote:

Lauren: haha aw that's sweet...but i dont' think it really works that way, though it would be nice if it did

She doesn't want to hurt your feelings which is why she's sugarcoating it, but she really doesn't like you like that. This is your wake-up call (even though you won't take it). If you stop now, you may be able to save face and keep your friendship with her.

Quote:

OAO3405: If you say so. Lemme guess, haven't found the right guy?
Lauren: yeah i dont' know...maybe....but i'm really focused on my grades right now

You should have left it at the last one, and now you're actually starting to invade her personal space.

Quote:

Lauren: alright well i'll talk to you later...hope you feel better...bye!

This means that no, she doesn't want to hop in bed with you because she's concerned about your headache. She is still willing to be friends with you, but if you pull off more of these moves, that'll change.
At least you left it here. You still have a chance at having a friend.

Lotida · #12

Good Advice for you to take OAO!

MLE · #13

He probably won't take it.

CaptainBubba · #14

No, seriously OAO. You cannot talk to girls like that. Jesus fucking christ.

You are far too direct and not at all charming or charismatic. You have the same linguisitc skills as Bonzi Buddy. You have the physical appearance of a guy who cries when engaged in confrontation. You have no sense of humor or social behaviors. Talking to girls while you're still in your faux-intelectual phase is just going to make you cringe when you look back on it in oh, say, 3 years. Just play video games. Its safer and Noone will judge you.

Except all of us, but thats just because we already know what a fat socially inept quasi-autistic ass you are.

AChimp · #15

HI LADIES. I'M OAO. I'M A DASHING SWORDSMAN. WANT TO BE MY GIRLFRIEND?

GADZOOKS · #16

Just wondering OAO, did ANY of these conversations have her IMing you.

Rongi · #17

remember that episode of family guy when the griffins have to move down south to get away from a serial killer? well there was this one part were chris is at a birthday party of this girl he has a crush on. and she kind of likes him too, but chris comes off as an extremely awkward teenager. at one point chris accidently sprays perfume into her eyes because he was trying to be charming. OAO, that conversation you had with lauren was so much like that episode it's frightening.

MLE · #18

i remember that

Schimid · #19

maccubbin <3 <3 <3

OAO, chill out with the girlfriend stuff. It isn't going to happen until you leave it alone, and even then it's a longshot. For you.

HickMan · #20

Just ask her until she says yes. Then you will realize she is a waste of time. Plus, she'll think you're a stalker dude.

Rongi · #21

I shall use my psychic powers to see into OAO's pathetic future

OAO is going to work in a porno when he's in his 20s. he wont actually work, he'll sit in the back room and masturbate to the covers until on his 6th or 7th time the orgasm he has will be so miniscule he'll actually go up to the counter and pretend to do something. he will get a girlfriend, but the two will become so bored of eachother that they eventually part. he will lose his virginity to her, but it will happen so fast he wont even remember it and will exaggerate it to his buddies on other forums but they wont even really listien. OAO will fall into a heavy drug addiction resulting in his death sprawled across a piss stained rug gasping for breath with his shirt ripped open revealing his massive stomach. it will be a closed casket funeral and his mother and maybe his father will show up. depends on if his father can get up out of bed or not.

The One and Only... · #22

Fuckers, I've already taken your advice.

I'm done with this whole puss-ass phase, anyway. I really need to get back to obscure politics, multisyllable words, extreme variants of metal/hardcore, fencing, guns, and roleplaying.