http://www.diseasedminds.com/politics/aliens.html
The first conspiracy. Written the morning of the crash.
It reads:
Aliens are attacking! You heard me right. This morning, the evil Martian lord Tom Petty, taking a break from tour, was in his space craft, about to head off to Alpha 97, the quadrant hidden behind Mars, where his evil forces reside. The U.S. Space program was researching the league of martian evil, and was to return with the seret plans Tom Petty and the martian elite had to take over earth!
Tom Petty isn't alone, obviously. His crack team of other martians, include Billy Joel, Elton John, John Denver, The Spice Girls, and Fred Durst. Their plot had been boiling, and they had created a genome project, to develop big scary mosters, made out of carbon dioxide, bumper stickers, and rubber bands. These ghastly rubber-band sticker dioxide men were being produced in the hundered daily, when America sent a space craft to steal the plans, and ultimatly stop the invasion.
Their trip, however, fell short. On their way back, Billy Joel manned a huge, piano shape deathmahcine, and hunted the shuttle into the atmosphere, blasting it with Martian Space-goo blasters. I had received trasmissions I had hacked into, of some of the late heroes claiming "Why the fuck is a piano shooting at us!?!"
It was their last transmission. They were vaporized, with small pieces of their fried corpses and ship landing on the ground, covered in the secret Martian Space Goo. The government quickly blocked off these pieces, for "testing".
The martians, disguised as earth musicians, can now easily "go on tour", and release these rubber-band sticker monsters all over the arenas, allowing the choas to ensue, and we will all die at their hands.
There is nothing we can do, but pray, that they have a weakness.
I've said too much.