Where's the thread for this debacle? I didn't see one so I'm making my own. I made a conscious decision not to see trailers or spoilers, or listen to reviews as I wanted it to be a purely unadulterated experience.
1) The CGI was cool. I guess.
2) It sucked giant, saggy, old man balls.
 Spoilers! |
The first thing I noticed was that David Hyde Pierce wasn't the voice of Abe Sapien in this sequel. That disappointed me. Not so much that it wasn't the same, but that I could tell.
One of the first scenes has Abe and Jeffrey Tambor walking through the facilities, and it smacked of Men In Black. Do. Not. Want.
There were several scenes where it appeared as though Hellboy's head was disproportionately large compared to his body. He seemed larger in the first movie. Did Hellboy do Atkins or something?
When they went in to the Troll Market it felt like a cheap version of the Star Wars III cantina.
Too many attempts at making "cute" creatures. Tooth fairies? Come on! And the bouncing bean elemental? And the "tumor" baby on the ghoul? GTFO. I'm here to see some bloody action. Not to hear girls in the audience go, "Aaawwwwww! How cuuuuute!" /shudder
Did anyone else want to throw their bucket of popcorn at the screen during the scene when ol' girl tells Hellboy she's pregnant? And then at the end when makes a reference to his "child" and she corrects him using a plural tense? Effin'. Geh.
The whole scene where Hellboy actually meets death was entirely too succinct. That in itself could comprise a good 30 minutes of film IMO. They should have made that far more interesting.
I'm also supposed to believe that an entire race of noble, magical elfish-like-people have been living in Manhattan sewers for eons. Oh, and golden flakes of IDKWTF rain down on them while they congregate around the elf king. In a feckin' sewer. In New York. Oh, and I l loved all the natural lighting down there BTW.
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There were too many disappointments and discrepancies to list here. It's almost like they tried to fit 4 hours worth of plot in to 2 hours, but then said "eff it" because the shortest path from point A to point B is to just feckin' forget about points!
Bad Guillermo, bad!
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