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Dixie · #1

I need to quit smoking. I've tried before and did terribly and I need help. No dick sucking jokes and oral fixation jokes or I'll bust ya one right in the nose. Come on, someone here has got to be a loser like me, there are tons of people even more pathetic than me on here.

Matt Harty · #2

Try hypnosis.

McClain · #3

Talk to sspad. He quit. At least last I checked he did. But we'll see how tough he is when I'm blowing smoke in his face!

Dixie · #4

Ok let me elaborate. Without spending money. I'm trying to just not buy anymore and going "cold turkey" (I hate that phrase). I can't use gum, patches or any of that shit. It's been 2 days so far and I'm wearing down.

dreaddi · #5

quit hanging around with smokers as much as possible, otherwise you'll always be thinking "I'll just bum one more off my friend".

McClain · #6

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carnivore Is God

Ok let me elaborate. Without spending money. I'm trying to just not buy anymore and going "cold turkey" (I hate that phrase). I can't use gum, patches or any of that shit. It's been 2 days so far and I'm wearing down.

You'll feel better tomorrow. I'd suggest giving your body a different stimulant for balance. Drink some coffee or Mountain Dew for the next couple days.

Dixie · #7

GAHHH NOOOO! Caffiene is bad for me, I can't have it. God I'm sickly. I'm actually not to have caffiene, I drink only water and I eat very healthy. Smoking is my only bad habit, maybe some green tea might work. You're a darling McClain! And dreddi all I know are smokers, you give bad advice, burn in Hell.

RedLeader01 · #8

Try killing yourself, that will keep you from smoking.

mburbank · #9

Oh, good one, Red Leader, make a joke about suicide on a board devoted to Mockery, like that's not just begging for an ass kicking.

Cosmo Electrolux · #10

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedLeader01

Try killing yourself, that will keep you from smoking.

You retarded bastard, why don't you shut the fuck up?

Dixie · #11

Quote:

Try killing yourself, that will keep you from smoking.

Up your nose with a rubber hose, if I killed myself then I wouldn't be able to pimp your mom out at the old folks home. No one likes you.

sspadowsky · #12

I still smoke, McClain

, but not nearly as much as I used to.

I'll go anywhere from a couple of days to a week without smoking at all, depending on my mood.

CIG (<--

), do some exercise. Anything that makes you winded will tend to make you want to not smoke. And don't just drink water. Drink shitloads of water. Like, at least a gallon a day. You'll be surprised how much better you feel.

Dixie · #13

Yeah yeah I know what my name spells ironically. It sounds like I'm on the right track but I just figured there was something I could do other than everything else (which I already do it seems) to lessen my irritability and fidgetyness. Midol seems to work once a month, lemme give it another try. Thanks yall.

RedLeader01 · #14

You guys take things WAY to seriously! For the idiot that started this useless thread, you came to a "We Mock You!" web site asking for quit smoking advice? Boy are you dumb. It's an open invitation for us to make fun of you!

King Hadas · #15

Remove as much stress from your life as possible. My uncle quit smoking by locking himself up in his house for two weeks, quit cold turkey but my uncle was unemployed so I'm not sure you can do that.

Dixie · #16

Duh Buttcocky, if what you had said actually bothered me do you think I'd bother to respond to you? If someone here annoys me I typically don't even bother with them. Apparently YOU take it too seriously. But seriously guyz, I am trying to become a functioning member of the New Order where cigarettes are illegal. Thank you.

RedLeader01 · #17

Get a jar and put a dollar bill in it everytime you have have a smoke. If you can't afford it, then don't smoke. Gradually you'll need less and less since it will cost $1 ever time you light up. Eventually you'll stop smoking, than have a jar full on money to go celebrate with!

Dixie · #18

See that wasn't so hard. And now I say "thank you" to you too for contributing to something worthwhile, my health.

MetalMilitia · #19

Im trying to give up too.
The way im doing it is to not smoke all week then have mabey 1 or 2 at the most on saturday as a reward for not smoking the rest of the week.
Then hopefully in a while il be able to give up at the weekend too and never smoke again.... well thats the plan anyway.

Quote:

Try killing yourself, that will keep you from smoking.

UNLESS YOU GET CREMATED!