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pjalne pjalne is offline
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 05:48 AM        Cyborg monkeys now a reality.
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/04301/402431.stm
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 05:53 AM       
What they failed to note in the article was that during a demonstration, formerly renowned Monkeyologist Dr. Krautstuffer burst into the room shouting "WAIT! STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING! THIS CYBERMONKEY TECHNOLOGY IS A CRIME AGAINST NATURE, THE WORLD IS NOT READY FOR IT!" and was then removed and stripped of his honorifics.

And how the cybermonkey will be transported to a maximum security zoo by a handsome, broody distrustful guy who's only doing this for the money, a beautiful woman with a dark secret from her past, and a non-descript black guy who cracks jokes about how white people are not like black people.
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 05:59 AM       
Ok, FUCK YOU, now I have to come up with something else for scriptwriting class tomorrow.
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 09:27 AM       
so if the monkies uprise now, removing their limbs wont stop them for long...
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 11:08 AM       
I once tried to commission a painting of cyborg monkeys from Doopa, but she refused.
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 11:44 AM       
Would you put your brain in a robot body? :2021
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 02:00 PM       
I think you're all missing the important part of this article.

Quote:
In June, researchers at Brown University implanted a chip in the brain of a 24-year-old Massachusetts man with paraplegia. The first of five patients to be implanted in the pilot study, the man is able to move a computer cursor just by thinking about it, enabling him to change TV channels or open e-mail.
CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW GOOD I'D BE AT DOOM? CAN YOU??
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the_dudefather the_dudefather is offline
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 08:14 PM       
woahs, that would be cool. imagine destroying popups with the power of your mind

or playing counterstrike without touching the keyboard and mouse as if fixed in a trance
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 08:32 PM       
OR MERGING WITH THE INTERNET AND BECOME THE PRINCE OF CYBERSPACE
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 09:33 PM       
You don't EVEN have to download porn, YOU CAN JUST THINK ABOUT DONWLOADING PORN!
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pjalne pjalne is offline
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Old Oct 31st, 2004, 09:37 PM       
Or you hack into banks and transfer a lot of money to your own account just by thinking about it. And when the police come to arrest you, you can just say "Hey, I was just THINKING about it. You can't arrest someone for their thoughts. Meine Gedanken sind frei." and they'll say "Oh shit, he's right sorry sir."
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Old Nov 1st, 2004, 01:23 AM       
THOUGHT POLICE
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pjalne pjalne is offline
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Old Nov 1st, 2004, 11:27 AM       
Oh crumbs, what if you sit there browsing the internet with your thoughts and suddenly think "I could really go for some nachos right now" and you suddenly get four hundred nocho pop-ups?
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pjalne pjalne is offline
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Old Nov 1st, 2004, 11:30 AM       
I'm totally using this thread to write an article for freelance class.
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Old Nov 1st, 2004, 12:30 PM       
anyone read dean koontz's "midnight"? the people who don't fall victim to primitive instincts become fused with their computers.
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