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Superior Electric Sheep
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Richmond, Virginia
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May 8th, 2011, 03:35 PM
Babs ... I read you first post. That's abuse, plain and simple.
I read this one time and I have kept saved in a little folder for advice (cuz I can't remember everything I read):
Quote:
"We (humans) are programmable creatures of habit. This means that we can grow accustomed to, and make a habit out of just about anything. Do you have any idea how many times I hear women and men say, "I never thought I could do that"? This is after they make a habit of whatever they didn't think they could do even once. Given an extreme situation (or programming [http://life experiences, etc.|http://life experiences, etc.]), we may stoop to levels we never dreamt possible.
Women and men must draw firm lines and enforce them early in our relationships. We must eradicate a potential habit before it takes shape. This means that our reaction to the first insult or hit is exceedingly more important than our reaction to the second hit. My hypothesis: Given an extreme situation and/or an incompatible partner, anyone may resort to mild violence. And guess what, unless you send a strong message via punishment and/or effective intervention, the probability for escalation may be high. This of course depends on the character traits of the individual involved, the history of the relationship, and the details surrounding the incident, etc.
Remember, "It's not easy to teach old dogs new tricks." In other words, once a habit has taken shape, it is difficult to reshape."
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If there is one thing to really take from this is " once a habit has taken shape, it is difficult to reshape."
This goes for her and for you because if you fell into this relationship there has to be some habits within yourself you might want to address.
Step away from this woman, move away, start fresh, analyze yourself, get some pro help if you need, and take a break from the women until get you straight.
If you don't want to change your situation or you there isn't much that can be done unless she does something that involves her leaving you on her accord or her going to jail for abusing you physically or something.
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