Stupid shit you did as a kid

[Kitsa]

that actually sounds pretty cool. I wish kids around here were that inventive.

I know it used to be a big deal in the mid 80s for some places to offer a drink called "Secret Weapon" or something like that that was just all of the different fountain drinks mixed together.

My grandmother used to let me play "pharmacy" with spices and a mortar and pestle when I was about 4. She also let me draw on mirrors with shaving cream and that was kickass.

[ZeldaQueen]

Originally Posted by bigtimecow

you know how kids do that lemonade stand shit? well me and my friends did something similar (i think we were like 8) by taking like a shitload of stuff from my kitchen (vanilla extract, eggs, random food condiments and items) and put them in a huge bowl. we then stood on my lawn with a sign that said "TAKE A WHIFF // 25 cents" or something like that. i know we got at least one guy to smell it

When I was a kid, I tried to set up a fortune-telling business with Tarot cards. I had this booklet that told me what the different cards meant, but I didn't get the concept that I was supposed to have already memorized the meanings. As a result, I told the (three or so) customers that I had to wait while I looked up their fortunes.

Also, my brother kept interrupting me by arranging two sticks into an x-shape and asking my customers what movie it symbolized (answer: X-Men).

[Kitsa]

The one time I did the lemonade stand thing, I didn't understand that you were supposed to give people change. One guy paid me with a dollar for a dime cup of lemonade and I just thought he was being really, really generous. I pocketed the money and wondered why he was still standing there.

[ZeldaQueen]

At least you got paid. Most of my customers were my neighbors and got fortunes for free. I never really was good at the whole "free enterprise" thing.

[Dixie]

My sister and I poured the Ghostbusters ectoplasm goo on my little brothers head.
We got all but a little piece out of his hair and started to freak out because mom would get mad at us for it.
So we cut his hair, but only that little spot.
Mom still got mad.

[LordSappington]

One time I was riding my bike to school, hit a rock somehow, and for whatever reason my bike just stopped immediately, and the inertia cause the back wheel to flip over the handlebars, with me still on it. Basically I used my face as a brake, and still had to go to school with stitches all over me. It was kinda bad ass.

[ZeldaQueen]

Originally Posted by Carnivore Is God

My sister and I poured the Ghostbusters ectoplasm goo on my little brothers head.
We got all but a little piece out of his hair and started to freak out because mom would get mad at us for it.
So we cut his hair, but only that little spot.
Mom still got mad.

I did something similar to my brother (totally on accident). I stuck gooey stuff in his hair twice, and it came out. The third time, it didn't. My brother was little and freaked out and ran to mom. Needless to say, she wasn't very happy. She had to use a butter knife and peanut butter to get it out.

[zeldasbiggestfan]

When I was about 5 I loved to watch my Pop shave. So one time I took a shower and found a razor of his. Needless to say, I fucked up my lip, and anytime I see a plain orange/yellow razor I think of that.

Another time I tried to see cans of soda at the entrance of my neighborhood with a sign on line paper, written in pencil it said "Soda 25 Cents". I didn't even get a honk.

A really sad thing I remember, about 4 or 5 years ago when I first started playing guitar, I though Nirvana was the best and hardest thing to play ever. So I called a girl I liked that I knew liked Nirvana. I tried to play Polly for her, fucked up, she hung up, and I didn't play guitar for the rest of the day.

[Zomboid]

THE STUPIDEST SHIT YOU DID AS A KID WAS WHEN YOU REGISTERED HERE

[Palmerholic]

I had a bad history of drinking alcohol as a kid. It wasn't intentional, it was just that I could be incredibly dumb sometimes and not notice the funny taste.

When I was around 5 years old I was at an anniversary party for some relatives and got into some spiked punch. I didn't have a very much fun after that and my tiny body got hung over instantly.

On Christmas Eve when I was 8 or 9 I drank my grandmother's rum and coke instead of my non-alcoholic coke. At least there wasn't enough rum for me to get violently sick that time.

In 9th grade my medication I was taking at the time got mixed with my mother's sleeping pills and for a few nights I got really heavy-lidded and sick before my mother realized the mix up. Fortunately my mother was smart enough to flush the rest of the sleeping pills.

[Kitsa]

At my bf's graduation party, his nephew (a toddler) was running around taking sips of everyone's soda. He's just at a stage where if he sees a can of soda sitting around, he thinks it's ok for him to sample. Most of the time, people keep a close eye on what they're drinking for that reason.

So at the party, everyone's sitting around and suddenly someone screams, "He's drinking alcohol!" He'd picked up a bottle of something (probably one of those Smirnoff Ice things) and was just glug-glugging away.

Kids do that, I guess.

[Neen]

Was he an angry drunk, or did he get all gregarious?

[Kitsa]

I don't know that he got more than a couple of sips, but he's the kind of kid who growls and headbutts under normal circumstances.

[Tadao]

Is this kid me?

[Kitsa]

that depends, are you my boyfriend's nephew?

[Tadao]

I'll need your boyfriends full name to check.

[Kitsa]

[Zomboid]

THAT'S OUR TADAO

[AChimp]

I almost hanged my brother with a skipping rope from our clothesline. I was getting ready to kick the stool out from under him when my mom ran out of the house screaming at me to stop.

[McClain]

My brother and I told our little sister that the little circular wooden bead dangling at the end of a ceiling-fan pull-chain was a piece of chocolate. We set her on top of the dining room table and watched as she swallowed it whole. Then began to choke - while it was still attached to the chain. Her arms were flailing everywhere and we were in shock. She was kicking and throwing her arms so we couldn't pull her down... we ended up pushing the table out from under her and she fell to the ground. She cried and complained of a sore throat but we promised her candy if she kept her mouth shut.
Looking back that's probably one of the funniest things I've ever done.

[LordSappington]

Yesterday I took an artillery shell (those fireworks that shoot out of the tube and explode) and removed the colorful part, took the the explosive and wrapped it in ace bandage reaaaal tight, kit it and threw it into a bee nest, then GTFO'd. I don't think I've ever run faster; those bees were rightfully PISSED.

[The Leader]

You should have put it in your mouth instead.

[MattJack]

When I was 16 I had an old Scream mask from Halloween some years earlier. One of my little brothers was absolutely terrified of the thing.

One night we were horsing around and I ran to the back of our parents house where all the lights were turned off. I was hiding and planning on jumping out to scare him/smack him in the face when he got no close enough. Well as it turns out that Scream mask was sitting by me, so I just put it on to help my cause.

When he got close enough I jumped out of the darkness with the mask on. His face lit up and he screamed in absolute horror. He began running in place like Fred Flinstone. Once he got some traction he turned around and bolted as fast as he could. Problem was there was a wall behind him, and he just ran face first into it. It dazed him pretty bad. I had to take off the mask and calm him down.

That s*it was funny.

[MattJack]

Another time I was absolutely baked out of my mind and driving with some friends of mine.

I was driving down the highway doing about 80mph and I noticed that the road just dropped off. At first I was just trying to tell myself that it couldn't do that and that I was just too high for my own good.

Well as I got closer I could see that the highway seriously just dropped off. My mind started racing on what I should do, but I didn't just want to stop in the highway. I kept telling myself I was just tripping.

Right when I got to the drop off I slammed the brakes and let out a scream. It wasn't just any scream. It was a yell/scream that you will make right before you know you're going to die. I knew I was dead and there wasn't a damn thing I could do.

Turns out it was just a big shadow from an exit sign above the highway.

[liquidstatik]