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  #1  
mburbank mburbank is offline
The Moxie Nerve Food Tonic
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 11:53 AM        MUST READ NEWS ITEM!!
Actor Tom Sizemore Fails Drug Test with Fake Penis


LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Actor Tom Sizemore has been jailed for violating his probation by failing a drug test after he was caught trying to use a prosthetic penis to fake the results, a Los Angeles County prosecutor said on Friday.


Sizemore, 43, who played a battle-hardened sergeant in the war movie "Saving Private Ryan," was placed in custody on Thursday. He was ordered to remain behind bars until a hearing on Feb. 24, unless he posts $25,000 bond, Deputy District Attorney Sean Carney said.
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  #2  
EisigerBiskuit EisigerBiskuit is offline
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 12:01 PM       
I was going to type nothing, because I really had nothing to say anything about this. This is just fucking ridiculous.
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sspadowsky sspadowsky is offline
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 12:05 PM       


Oh, holy shit.

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Dole Dole is offline
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 12:28 PM       
It would be nice to know the exact circumstances of how he was caught out
'Oi, hang on! That cock's never real....give us a feel, go on..I knew it!'
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pjalne pjalne is offline
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 12:54 PM       
Or maybe it fell out.

Sizemore may be a wife-beating drunk, but I still love him.

You don't know him like I do.
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  #6  
the_dudefather the_dudefather is offline
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 12:58 PM       
lolz

edit: according to a news item this is the 'penis' he used

http://www.thewhizzinator.com/index.html

"YES, WE SELL DEHYDRATED URNIE SEPARATLEY"
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Anonymous Anonymous is offline
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 01:45 PM       
that is the best product ever

TESTIMONIALS!

I should be sending you guys a check every week! I make 10 times more money then i used 2. All because of this product. Thanx guys!
PJ,CA

Wow this product is great. I passed my drug test like that! you guys are so awesome. because of you, im not in jail..ty
BALLS, MI

Wow! You guys are pathetic. So many testimonials to use drugs (and by far the most spelling and grammatical errors I have ever seen; seems like the drugs affect your ability to write English as well). If you morons spent half your energy trying to stay clean from mind-numbing substances that you do trying to pass a piss test, you'd all be fucking geniuses with your own island somewhere growing weed and staying the hell away from me. One testimonial was right on. I'm a probation officer and I don't give a flying fuck if you smoke your shriveled brains into oblivion. My concern is all the other people you carelessly hurt in the process of your self-centered pursuit of feeding your need to be numb. Please take your fake dicks and go fuck yourselves and stop taking everyone else down with you into your sewer. Believe me, I'd like nothing more than to leave you stupid fucks alone but it seems when I or my neighbor is affected by your inability to care about anyone but yourselves,!
I feel compelled to protect myself. Talk about freedom; I would like to be free of a society of shitheads who make drug use more important than taking care of themselves or their families. So many of you said "Now I can keep my job." What?!? If you weren't so toxic you'd figure out that it's fairly easy to get and keep a job. JUST STOP FUCKIN' IT UP DUMMY!
Not a chance, WA

Best Thing Out There, Dont Be Fooled By Those Drinks This Works Everytime
The Eggfella, CA

I think this is disgusting!!!
NY

my husband could not pass a drug test to get a decent paying job because we smoke a little to relax. Now he has a job and together we make enough to have a comfortable life. To all of you who think people should stop doing everything they do. Everytime you take one of those doctor prescribed pain pills or nerve pills when you know in your mind it's just to feel a little better or drink your beer or wine to relax it is the same only marijuana grows naturally and the bible even gives us all the plants of the earth so who are you and who is the government to say it is bad when even God doesn't and if it was legal to grow more people would be eating it instead of smoking it which would take away most if not all negative aspects. It is not your buisiness which plants I choose to grow or ingest or burn and the quality of our lives should not suffer because the beliefs of some differ from ours. Some of the nicest most intelligent people you know may smoke. Anyway thanks for th!
is product Thanks For helping us keep one more freedom
Living a Better Life in Communist,

because of this thing ive fucked my girlfriend more then once and passed all my tests, thank you guys all the same!!!!!
, TX

Land of the free and the home of the brave? Land of slaves and the home of the cowards more accurately. You let employers take your rights away like this? You submit to the indignity of allowing some stranger watch you urinate on a regular basis and then you call yourselves free? You are cattle.
Free UK

Hey, you guys messed up and sent me the big black whizzinator and got me kicked out of the KKK. But Earlene shore did scream when I did her last night! Yee Haw! Thanks whizzinator, you bunch of race mixing rubber ding dong makers!
Billy Bob Earl Elmer Jones, AR

I see that you do not make the Italian version because you would have to charge double if you did.
Angelo, DC

You will decide if your either part of the solution or part of the problem?its your choice?NAME: just another person relying on a Product instead of self...
CA

To those out there that are worried about pot smokers............ Understand this.
When you go in for a urine test at the request of your prospective employer, they not only test your urine for drugs, but for disease as well. Insurance companies don't like to insure potential costly patients. I have a disease that has prevented me from entering a new company for over a year. I have never "failed" the drug test, but have been turned down for "reasons beyond the control of the employer".
Since using the synthetic urine with the whizzinator, I am now employed with health insurance again.

DO NOT LET ANYONE PUT THEIR HANDS ON YOUR DNA OR ANYTHING ELSE. FOR YOU WOMEN OUT THERE THAT ARE PREGNANT AND WANT A NEW JOB, THIS IS PERFECT AS WELL. GET THE WHIZZINATOR AND GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT. SOME URINE.

WE ARE AT WAR PEOPLE, IT IS A CIVIL WAR, AND YOU ARE THE TARGET. MAKE SURE YOU ARE PROTECTED.
right to privacy, IN
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  #8  
Immortal Goat Immortal Goat is offline
Now with less sodium!
 
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Old Feb 16th, 2005, 02:06 PM       

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