Sometimes when you're
watching a horror movie, particularly when you're watching a bad one,
you start to notice little things about the film: a misplaced
character in the background, an odd fact in a "scientific" explanation
for something, or more often, the run-time printed on the back cover
of the DVD. I was observing the latter while checking out an
occidental turd called Gargoyle: Wings Of Darkness when an
interesting scene began to unfold...
Ok, "interesting" wasn't exactly the word I was looking for, but stay
with me: the protagonists are trying to figure out where all these
missing people are going, and that is getting really dull, so the
movie cuts away to load up some more monster fodder.
It's nighttime, and a
man has decided to take his squadron of boys to the carnival. First
off, there were two weird things about this: despite the events of the
movie being set and filmed in Romania, this is the only scene with
anyone speaking Romanian (let alone anything other than American
English), and for some reason, the man and his kids are dressed like
they just came from a wedding reception. Who the hell puts on a sport
coat to go to the carnival, apart from the ringmaster?
Anyway, what's coming up is so obvious that even the characters in the
movie start to suspect that trouble is afoot.
All the kids want to
ride the rickety Ferris wheel, except for one. While the other kids
are jabbering on in Romanian, he just looks up at the thing. The man
finally relents and starts passing out tickets and shooing the kids
over to the ride, but this kid won't go. He protests, possibly stating
that he doesn't trust carny engineering, but the man isn't about to be
contradicted by a wee lad. The kid won't ride it on his own accord,
and so the man drags him on and rides with him.
Aw, that's such a nice
father/son moment. I assume they're father and son. Whatever they are,
as soon as they're on the ride, the kid starts yelling in fear, and so
the "dad" takes a few swigs from his flask and starts mocking the
Ha ha, oh, drunk
Romanian slob. You are such a character! He's so involved with his
drinking and mocking that doesn't notice that the kid's whining drops
off when the car stalls at the top of the Ferris wheel. The kid tries
to point out something unusual heading toward them, but, well...
The carny operating the
ride hears the ruckus coming from the cart, and so he brings the car
back down to the landing to see what's up.
The kid just sits there,
shaking his head and mumbling incoherently. The look on his face is
priceless. How did that kid not get even a nod from the Academy?
Email Dr. Boogie
SCARY-ASS TRADING CARD #10!
COLLECT ALL 19 SERIES II CARDS
FOR A SPECIAL 20TH CARD!
*copy this URL
down, you'll need it once you've found all 19 cards!*
Directed by Leslie
Stevens, the creator of "The Outer Limits", shot by Conrad hall,
three-time academy award winning cinematographer, and starring a
pre-Kirk William Shatner, this bizarre, creepy black and white
horror flick has been seen by... just about no one. Why? Could be the
fact that all the dialogue in Incubus is in Esperanto, a
constructed international auxiliary language created by linguist
created by L. L. Zamenhof in 1887 as a universal second language to
foster peace and international understanding.
Find all 19 Series II "Scary-Ass
Trading Cards" this September and October (2007) and you'll not only get a
special secret final 20th card emailed to you, but you'll automatically be
entered to win a Halloween prize pack from I-Mockery! Cards will
be placed in random new I-Mockery articles during the months of
October. Simply copy the URLs of each card down into a text file
whenever you find them.
Once you have
collected the URLs of all the cards, simply email them to
firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject line
"I-Mockery's Scary-Ass Trading Cards!" and you will have the
special 20th card emailed to you and you'll be entered to win a
Halloween prize pack which may include masks, DVDs and more!
Remember, the cards MUST say "Series II" on them
or they will not be counted.
NOT email the actual card
graphics to us. We only want you to email us the URLs of
all the cards which you can find directly underneath them.
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