
This talk about
catchphrases is costing you valuable chick-hunting time. "Zip it and
ship it, Stickfinger!" you tell Mongoose. "If I don't get me some action
soon, I'm going to turn gay and if I'm going down, I'm taking one of you
with me."
"Wow, great catchphrase." Mongoose replies.
"What, 'I'm going to turn gay'?"
"No, the other one. Anyway, which way do we go? Fate seems to have
appointed you the head of our expedition."
You cock an eye at Mongoose's sudden outburst of Dungeons & Dragons
nonsense, but he quickly composes himself by punching Theodore in the
neck and carving a horribly crooked pentagram in his own forehead.
"I say... thattaway!"
You head off into a random direction, so drunk on your newfound sense of
leadership that your confidence defies reason. I mean, you have no idea
where you're going. Your companions don't seem to realize this though,
and they follow you blindly through the forest. After a while of clawing
through the thick undergrowth, you start to doubt your sense of
direction. Just when you mean to speak up and tell your hapless team of
stereotypes that you think you're lost, Chin-myu gets a fit of
excitement.
"Smell girls! Smell girls! Girlie girl perfume and body oil products!"
he chatters, jumping up and down. Everyone backs away a little
apprehensively as he starts naming off all the brands of shampoo,
deodorant and facial cream that he's smelling, including their store
prices.
"Which way, Chin-myu?" you ask, as the torrent of of brands begins to
dissipate.
"There! There!" he yelps, and runs off.
"Hey! Wait!" Francis exclaims, and rushes after him.
Before you and the others can pursue them, a voice speaks up.
"Seems they try to catch bear with bare hands, hm?"
Startled, you spin around to find that there's a mysterious Native
American standing behind you. You didn't hear him approach, it's almost
as if he simply appeared, like magic...

This isn't what he looks like, but it IS proof that Native
Americans are either Spider-Man, God, from outer space, or all three.
"Um, hi." you say
cautiously.
"Come on, man! We gotta head after those guys before we lose track of 'em!"
Mongoose complains, obviously ready to spring into action.
"Me am called Squatting Fox." the Native American says. "Maybe you like
to do a little business, hm?"
"Uh... what've you got in mind?" you ask, torn between joining the hunt
for girls and conversing with a strange man in the middle of the forest.

Squatting Fox holds out
a small brown pouch. "You heard of peyote, hm? This stuff make peyote
look like washing powder. Send you on powerful vision quest, not to
mention get you pretty goddamn high. Special price."
"Man, you can stay here and talk to Chief Offensive Stereotype if you
want, but me and the guys are going to head after the nerd and the Asian
kid." Mongoose says, as he, Theodore and Dizzy Steve vanish through the
bushes.
"Squatting Fox know many things." the man continues, when you make a
move in the direction your buddies just ran. "Many things that others
have forgotten. Things about past, hm? Camp Chopleton not a safe place.
Never have been."
It would appear the creepy, ethnic recluse is knowledgeable about the
camp's mysterious past. What a strange turn of events. However, if you
don't follow after your buddies now, you might lose track of them
altogether.
You decide to:
|