It seems a little odd, having to bring your own toilet to camp, but an official letter from the camp's administrator is an official letter from the camp's administrator, so after a quick raid on Dad's tool chest and five or six minutes of 'pondering', (The words 'tool' and 'chest' being so exciting and all), you lie down on your back and scooch under the old John. Yesiree. The 'crapper'. The 'Throne'. The 'Porcelain Bus'. 'Ye Olde Shitter'. 'Star Gate SG Poop'. The 'Fecal Funnel'. 'Mr. Hanky's Flume Ride'. 'Li'l Stevie Hawkin's Excrement Event Horizon' Oops. Too much thinking about holes. Time to 'ponder' again. No wonder everybody hates teenage boys.
Having never attempted
to remove a toilet before, you're not sure what equipment you'll need,
but like dad always said, 'It takes more than an exposed butt crack to
be a plumber, but not much more.' It's just a matter of the right tools
for the right job. A little overkill never hurt anyone. So, you take the
vice grips, and put 'em up on the closed toilet seat, take a flat head
screwdriver and put it with the vice grips, take a philip's head screw
driver, an allen wrench, a torque wrench, a monkey wrench, the... what
the hell kind of wrench... oh, that's not a wrench... and it's not
Dad's. Wonder if Mom knows dad has that? Wonder what dad's using it for?
Oh, well, power drill, ball peen hammer, rubber mallet and pipe wrench
up on the toilet seat and OW!
OKAY, FORGET CAMP. YOU JUST ACCIDENTALLY |