This cabin is a mess. If you're going to live here, you might as well get it a little cleaned up before you start messing it up again like you always do. You start by grabbing a stack of sheets and making your bed, having claimed the least flea-ridden bed as your own. Afterwards, you pause for a moment to consider the fleas in the beds, and mumble a joke about bedbugs. You fail to amuse even yourself with the attempt, and quietly thank god that no one else was around to hear your bafflingly lame joke.

And speaking of worthless filth, you worthless filth, the cabin could use a going-over with a broom. So sweep you do. But where to put this pile of dust you've gathered up? Why, right into the dark corner of the room. You sweep the mess over to the corner and spot a tangled mass of cords. You should be able to sweep the dust under the cords, and that way, no one will notice how half-assed your attempted at sweeping was. You reach down to move the cords, when suddenly, you notice that they aren't cords at all; they're SNAKES!!!

START OVER...

Just kiddin'. Luckily, they're just garden snakes, and the half-dozen bites they give you merely cause you to shriek like an eight-year-old girl. Your embarrassing scream draws the attention of you bunkmates, who come rushing in the door to see if you're alright. You reassure them that you're alright, and that the cry they heard must have come from a different cabin. None of them appear to be buying your explanation, so you quickly change the subject to your sock drawer. You ask the closest of your bunkmates if he wants to help you color-coordinate your socks, but this just worsens your image as a huge sissy. Said bunkmate turns out to be stronger than he looks, as he drops you with a single punch, and to add insult to injury, he pulls off one of his own sweated-through socks and drapes it over your face.

And hey, it turns out that breathing in dirty sock fumes while you have a concussion can give you some serious brain damage. Well, look at it this way: now you won't have to worry about color-coordination anymore. You'll be having enough trouble with hand-eye coordination.

START OVER YOU FRIGGIN' VEGETABLE!!!