finally here... the system you've (not) been waiting for! Yes, The
We've genetically altered these rabbits with various Jellyfish genes so that they can look that much cuter, just for you! And the iRabbits are the easiest Apple systems to use ever! Just take a look as some of the features on these amazing little buggers!
An understandable question... allow us to explain. We here at (CR)Apple noticed a HUGE increase in sales when we released our original iMac computers. Why did they do so well?
Because they performed really well? Because they had much more software support than PC computers did? Because they were priced fairly? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
The reason we sold so many is because they were aesthetically pleasing to look at! Hell, those things were outright cute! We at (CR)Apple don't believe that the consumer is looking for a computer system that can run the latest software with ease... who in their right minds would want that? NO, we believe that the consumer out there is looking for a computer system that matches their decor! "Oh look honey! The iMac goes so nicely with our furniture! It even matches the salt shakers! I love our pretty little iMac!"
Yes we knew we struck gold when we released the iMac... but where could we go from there? I mean, how could we possibly make the system any worse, yet be even cuter than the iMacs!?!
The answer was clear: Exploiting Cute Fluffy Little Bunnies.
We spoke with Eduardo Kac, creator of the first "glow-in-the-dark" rabbit. He had been mutating these rabbits by combining their genes with the genes of Aequorea victoria, a species of fluorescent jellyfish. When we approached him with the idea of doing multiple color rabbits, he loved the idea and "hopped right to it", so to speak...
Now we truly believe we have created the most ungodly cute little bastard computer this planet will ever see. We're sure that it will sell millions, and we're sure that they'll break down quicker than hell. But hey, then we can just build something even cuter to sell to suckers just like you. So enjoy your new piece of shit: The iRabbit!
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