The Insane Halloween Scarecrow Alley At Lombardi Ranch!
by: -RoG-


A fine looking service dog scarecrow if I've ever seen one.

I guess part of their training is to learn how to sell Lombardi Ranch pumpkins from a wheelbarrow.
For the record, I approve of any scarecrows that make good use of googly eyes.

Scare Camp sure sounds...... scary.

Outside the tent, it has a bunch of mummified plush toys around a campfire.

I spy a Cabbage Patch Kid that's roasting a human ear instead of marshmallows. Yep, scary!

"Ghoulf Course" might be my favorite corny scarecrow joke yet.

The sand trap here is literally a trap, and now this poor witch can't finish playing her game.

How to train your dragon... to keep crows away from your crops.

The cast of Despicable Me appears to be getting into the Halloween spirit nicely this season.
The crucified scarecrow might need some assistance trick-or-treating though.


I don't know about you, but I was really hoping there would be a set
of scarecrows dedicated to the Duck Dynasty reality show. What luck!

Another dance stage design, but this one offers tickets and snacks.

I'm not sure what all the little black sack creatures with googly eyes are supposed to be, so let's just go with Critters.
Yeah, I'm sure that's what they were going for with these.

Alright, this is officially the most terrifying Cat in the Hat I've ever seen.


Got all that?

It's hard to make out since it was ravaged by the weather, but the sign reads:
"Unless someone like you kills a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better."
I guess Dr. Seuss omitted that line from the original story.

The horror... the horror...

Thing 1 is pretty creepy looking too.

Same for Thing 2.

Fun fact: apparently the Lorax reads Inspector Gadget comics.

It might be hard to tell, but that's the Headless Horseman. I think his horse's head is about to fall off too. If I were going
to modernize the Headless Horseman, that's what I'd do. I'd let him keep his head, but his horse wouldn't have one.

Frosty the Snowcrow. Yeah, I laughed.

Now here's a big setup. It's Billy the puppet from the Saw franchise, and he's now selling "UnLIMBited Treats to Die For".

"Use your brain. Don't pull our leg, give us a hand!"

Notice the oven temperature is 777? That's like in Spinal Tap where 11 is one better than 10.
Only this is like being "one better" than 666.

Ingredients and recipes for death.

A fine menu he has here, and I personally would love to see what "Ghost Gusts" are.

There are more photos from Scarecrow Alley to see!
Click here to continue onward to page 3!


Reader Comments



Forum Virgin
Oct 23rd, 2013, 11:29 AM
A wealth of riches, -RoG-! Some random observations:

"they're not gonna scare any crows away when they built a house to welcome 'em": wouldn't they be even more afraid of what surprises might lie anywhere near what is likely a haunted house?

Did Sam make an appearance? By now, it definitely feels dated if the Saw mascot shows up but not the Trick 'r Treat one!

Isn't 777 traditionally a symbol of good, a sort of anti-666? Though that would be appropriate after all...

It's pretty clear why Superman is wearing camouflage. If he blends in with the corn, the crows will be even more scared than if he was wearing his usual colorful outfit, since they can never tell when he's there!

A real shame that you didn't get a photo of the hand big enough to hold that "handful of the pumpkins they had for picking". What sort of giant creature did it belong to?

I was surprised that the petting zoo sign didn't read "evil petting zoo".

The first photo inside the corn maze was so reminiscent of those Myst-era early CD-ROM games, I half expected it to be image-mapped with the left and right turns each leading to different images from farther inside the maze!
Oct 23rd, 2013, 04:08 PM
Holy crap. All those displays featuring cute monsters and corny jokes, and then come the Dr. Seuss horrors telling you to go on a killing spree. That's nightmare fuel.
Forum Virgin
Oct 23rd, 2013, 05:42 PM
Cheap and reasonable prices. $3.00-$5.00 range (with the exception of "funpacks") for tickets and activities. You don't get that. I mean, if I was displaying Hellish-Cat-In-The-Hat with Evil Thing 1 and Evil Thing 2, you can bet I'd raise the price. Sidenote: Isn't it annoying to see so much Minecraft? Displays, merchandise, etc.? Wasn't it supposed to be popular last year? Not this year?
Cranberry Everything
Oct 23rd, 2013, 09:12 PM
Wow, I had no idea that place would be so massive!
Very cool photo tour.
Forum Virgin
Oct 23rd, 2013, 11:19 PM
Well destire, it can be massive. Too bad RoG didn't have an aerial view map like this one:
Pickled Patriarch
Oct 24th, 2013, 05:47 AM
Joel3K - Sam did not make an appearance, though he may have been hiding somewhere in the corn. I certainly wouldn't mind seeing him as he'd make an awesome scarecrow, albeit a short one.

A-bomb - Yeah, the Cat in the Hat one was so unexpectedly dark haha. Just one of the many things that made Scarecrow Alley an amazing Halloween spectacle.

MasterD - Indeed. The prices were totally reasonable, and I was surprised they weren't charging people to go into the Scarecrow Alley since it was my favorite part of the entire ranch.

dextire - Yeah, as seen in that aerial photo D just linked to, it's a large place. Plenty of room for expansion in the future too.
Im one good looking Troll
Oct 29th, 2013, 12:17 AM
I remembered that place I once went there with my family and a friend between the year 93-94. They once had a Ferris Wheel that look like it was made in the 60's.In the corn maze they had a scarecrow that appears to be sitting still and the guy was wearing makeup my dad was talking to him for 5 minutes and I even remembered the puppet witch that likes to talk to people.

Looking at it now the owner no longer works there and he somehow managed to have a bunch of 9-11 years old kids do most of decorations . It look like it had taken months or even a year to get the whole place done . I hope those kids got paid or else all that work was worth nothing.

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