by: -RoG-

The Official Nintendo Player's Guide!

"You are probably already familiar with many of the great video games produced by Nintendo and other manufacturers who make game paks that can be played on your Nintendo© Entertainment System™. But The Official Nintendo Player's Guide™ is designed to help make you a video game expert!"

Did you hear that!? A video game EXPERT! Wait, I thought all of their Nintendo Hotline people were video game experts. So does that mean, that everybody on that hotline simply read this book? Well screw paying the 2 bux per minute, let's buy the book!

In all seriousness, this book really was the king of all Nintendo books when it came out. It was literally a Nintendo player's bible. It covered over 90 games, including full-color screenshots, character listings, maps, and tips, and other little nuggets of info. For example, did you know the names of the Ikari Warriors are "Paul" (red headband) and "Vince" (blue headband)? Well you would know that if you owned The Official Nintendo Player's Guide. Well you'd also know it if you were paying attention to what I've written.

*chomp*

It also states the following about The Amazon from the game Pro Wrestling: "This wrestler wears a mask and his nationality is unknown. He uses illegal techniques like biting and attacking with Deadly Weapons whenever the referees aren't watching." Now there weren't any deadly weapons in the game at all, so I can only assume that The Amazon is a real person and was informing Nintendo's writers about his real-life fighting techniques. Either that or they were just making up some nonsense to fill up extra space in the book, just like I'm doing in this sentence right now.

ONWARD TO THE NEXT ITEM!

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