Please don't feed PickleMan
Please don't feed PickleMan
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Sexual Moments in Video Game History

Grab your trenchcoat and get ready to stalk!

Milking the oft used RPG formula of going to find the great treasure, but settling with saving the world, Landstalker put you in the shoes of a scrawny elf lad named Nigel. He and his fairy chumpette, Friday, fought through corrupt noblemen, grinning mushrooms, and at least a dozen different kinds of colored bubble monsters, all in pursuit of fabulous treasure. But of course, Nigel the Landstalker didn’t earn a place here in this piece just by slicing Jell-O monsters.

You can expect to find quaint, bucolic villages in almost any RPG out on the market. They’re where you’ll get your first dungeon-exploring quest, and they’re where you’ll first learn that you can sleep off even the most grievous injuries at the local inn. Unfortunately, the countryside villages in this game are sullied by the presence of foul-mouthed fowl.

Better give her what she wants...

Geez, that is a chicken that doesn’t beat around the bush. The rooster must be slacking off big time. Still, if you think that’s bad, wait ‘til you hear what the dog has to say…

That's German for "bark bark."

If that isn’t the language of the devil, then I don’t know what is…

Fine, maybe it is just regular dog-speak, but I still think it’s a bit odd. Especially coming from the mouth of a dog named “*”. Not Nigel, though, he doesn’t see anything strange about it at all. Then again, he isn’t the most observant guy in the world.

Killer bed-head

Yes, Nigel, I think the toupee-wearing skeleton is probably dead. Idiot.

Shake it baby!

Boy, those Japanese and their phallic symbols. It's hard to believe that nobody was raped in the making of this game. Still, say what you will about the giant vibrating phallic mushroom, he still carries a good amount of gold on himself. Where does he keep it? You don't want to know.