"Kid Niki Radical
Ninja" was always one of my favorite games to play on the good ol'
Nintendo Entertainment System. I'm not sure what the attraction was.
Maybe it was because you had to fight countless hordes of men who
looked like the fathers of "Shy Guys" from Super Mario Brothers. Or,
maybe it was simply because the artwork on the box and cartridge was
Yeah, ok, I'm pretty sure it was because of the latter.
One of the best
things about Kid Niki was his awesome... excuse me... radical
hair style. So my question is, why did they change it for this
particular sequel? In Kid Niki 3, also known as "Kaiketsu Yanchamaru
3 - Taiketsu! Zouringen" since it was only released in Japan, he no
longer had the porcupine spike hairdo. Instead, he has a simple
ponytail. That's -300 "Radical Points" right there, buster.
I mean really, just
look at how his old hair used to look. You can't tell me that those
spikes aren't more radical. Hell, they even managed to work in the
spikes on the old Commodore 64 version!
I'm not sure why
they changed his hair, nor do I understand why his face became
shaped like an eggplant. And speaking of which:
Yep, one of Kid
Niki's enemies is an eggplant with feet. There's also a throwing
star with feet (awww, cute lil' bugger) and a flower that has a hand
pop out which tries to shoot you. Amidst all of these oddly
delectable foes, there is one that stands out. You see, one of the
other major changes with the 3rd Kid Niki game is the inclusion of
something a bit more juicy. Something a bit more racy. Something a
bit more spicy. Something a bit more... penile.
Now I'm all for the
appreciation of art, and there are many impressive statues of nude
people all over the world, but I'll be damned if I can remember one
that can actually move, let alone shake its salami at ya. Kid Niki,
you may no longer be a radical ninja after this game, but by
god, if you're going up against a bunch of enemies that are trying
to piss on you... you're still braver than most of us.