Please don't feed PickleMan
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Sexual Moments in Video Game History

HE'S BACK! And... less radical. :(

"Kid Niki Radical Ninja" was always one of my favorite games to play on the good ol' Nintendo Entertainment System. I'm not sure what the attraction was. Maybe it was because you had to fight countless hordes of men who looked like the fathers of "Shy Guys" from Super Mario Brothers. Or, maybe it was simply because the artwork on the box and cartridge was hot pink?

fact: You can't be RADICAL without being PINK.
Yeah, ok, I'm pretty sure it was because of the latter.


Part eggplant, part monkey boy,  ALL ninja!

One of the best things about Kid Niki was his awesome... excuse me... radical hair style. So my question is, why did they change it for this particular sequel? In Kid Niki 3, also known as "Kaiketsu Yanchamaru 3 - Taiketsu! Zouringen" since it was only released in Japan, he no longer had the porcupine spike hairdo. Instead, he has a simple ponytail. That's -300 "Radical Points" right there, buster.


I mean really, just look at how his old hair used to look. You can't tell me that those spikes aren't more radical. Hell, they even managed to work in the spikes on the old Commodore 64 version!


I'm not sure why they changed his hair, nor do I understand why his face became shaped like an eggplant. And speaking of which:

wobble wobble        tee hee! What better way to say 'I LOVE YOU' ?

Yep, one of Kid Niki's enemies is an eggplant with feet. There's also a throwing star with feet (awww, cute lil' bugger) and a flower that has a hand pop out which tries to shoot you. Amidst all of these oddly delectable foes, there is one that stands out. You see, one of the other major changes with the 3rd Kid Niki game is the inclusion of something a bit more juicy. Something a bit more racy. Something a bit more spicy. Something a bit more... penile.

Oh you naughty little statue you!

Now I'm all for the appreciation of art, and there are many impressive statues of nude people all over the world, but I'll be damned if I can remember one that can actually move, let alone shake its salami at ya. Kid Niki, you may no longer be a radical ninja after this game, but by god, if you're going up against a bunch of enemies that are trying to piss on you... you're still braver than most of us.