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Please don't feed PickleMan
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Sexual Moments in Video Game History

BATTLETOADS!
BATTLETOADS!

In the world of console games, Battletoads has the distinction of being one of the most difficult games of all time. The oft-overlooked arcade version, however, is far less difficult, but far more violent. It had guns, blood sprays, decapitations, vomiting, and one of the greatest brawling attacks of all time.

He's here to find out who moved his cheese.

In every button-mashing, beat-em-up game, youíre pretty much obligated to fight one really huge guy who does a lot of damage with a single blow. In this case, the huge guy was a really ripped rat with a deep, menacing laugh. Theoretically, you could jump up and kick him in the head, or just work his knees until he bent down to an appropriate level, but the designers had something a little more brutal in mindÖ

*squeeeek!*

Simply put, you grab ahold of the muscular ratmanís groin, and he lets out a startled yelp, as any man would in a similar situation. Balls in hand, you then start hammering his punching bag until he falls over. Just look at this vicious assault on the poor rodentís crotch.

A groin-grabbingly good time.

Oh lordy. Rest assured that just like the black guy form Kung Fu, the ratman eventually dies after you finish pounding his scrote into Figgie Pudding. And what better way to celebrate such a sociopathic victory than with a couple pelvic thrusts?

The ladies love a toad with 'tude.

Booya, evil. Booya! Seriously, though, what other game can boast that it actually has a crotch-grabbing maneuver, aside from Michael Jacksonís Moonwalker? None, thatís how many.

Quit screwin' around back there!