I-Mockery
Please don't feed PickleMan
Please don't feed PickleMan
About Us Store Advertising Contact New to I-Mockery? Register an account and join in the pickled fun! New to I-Mockery? Register an account and join in the pickled fun!

Sexual Moments in Video Game History

POWER INSTINCT 2!
POWER INSTINCT 2!

Japan has given us a bevy of fighting games over the years. Unfortunately, theyíve been largely off-limits to me because any move more complicated than ďquarter-circle forward + punchĒ is pretty much beyond my means. In fact, any fighting game more advanced than Yie Ar Kung-Fu is likely to end in much cursing. Still, all that ineptitude has not prevented me from bringing you another bit of electronic ribaldry. This time, the game in question is Power Instinct 2.

I have no idea why the assembled fighters are battling each other. The whole game seems to take place in an amusement park, which is dotted with pictures of a strange-looking old woman, perhaps the theme parkís mascot. Among the fighters are a handful of old people, a guy who looks a lot like Axel from Streets of Rage, and a chubby Japanese kindergartener/exhibitionist named Kinta Kojuin.

Wait'll they get a load of me.

In the game, he wears some kind of smock with a bear head painted on the front to offset his Moe-from-The-Three-Stooges haircut. Not a particularly dignified outfit to be wearing to a fight, but hey, heís just a kid. He canít be counted on to dress himself properly. Then again, what kind of parents would send their kid out looking like this:

I have many special moves!

Anyway, heís got his dukes up, and heís ready to fight. When the fighting actually begins, things really go downhill for him. His fighting repertoire includes using his ass as a weapon and giving the player a peek at his hindquarters. Behold:

This one gets 'em every time! Are you lookin' at my ass?

Yech. Unfortunately, as is often the case, the pre-teen nudity did not end with a few instances of ass-baring. Whenever Kinta gets knock backwards, you get to see a critical design flaw in his fashionable outfit:

Avert your eyes, children!

Iím afraid your eyes do not deceive you. Whilst he is flying backwards through the air, you get an eyeful of Peter and his two friends. This marks the second game Iíve covered in which a wee lad does full frontal, and frankly, itís a streak that Iím eager to break.

I feel pretty, oh so pretty.


And so this concludes our journey into some of the most disturbing pits of video game hell. On behalf of myself (-RoG-), Dr. Boogie, and Pjalne, we hope you've enjoyed the tour. As stated earlier, this will be an ongoing piece, so if there's a video game with a sexual moment that you'd like to see us do a write-up on, let us know about it!


CLICK HERE TO SUGGEST THIS
PIECE TO A FRIEND!





[Minimocks] [Articles] [Games] [Mockeries] [Shorts] [Comics] [Blog] [Info] [Forum] [Advertise] [Home]


Copyright © 1999-2007 I-Mockery.com : All Rights Reserved : (E-mail)
No portion of I-Mockery may be reprinted in any form without prior consent
We reserve the right to swallow your soul... and spit out the chewy parts.