pick a page... any page!

Quite possibly the scariest moment EVER at a show. Onlooking fans were horrified when they saw what the singer of this band did. Due to a lack of self-control when performing live and under pressure, this lad took an ungodly dump in his pants. Yes indeed, the dreaded veggie dump! The green bubbling mass dribbled down his leg and onto the floor. He screamed in utter pain as it burned his intestinal walls along with his anal cavity. It even ate through the stage floor! And look at the guitarist next to him, he was the first one to take a big hearty whiff of that magic dump. I don't think there was ever a time in history when so many animal rights people and vegetarians gave up their ways. They always spoke of the "horrors" of cruelty to animals. Little did they realize that the TRUE HORROR lies within their own intestines!

Ok, who here has seen Pulp Fiction? Yeah, we've all seen "The Gimp" part in the movie... but did any of you ever wonder what he's been up to since? Wonder no more! The Gimp is now an animal rights activist! He "rescued" all these little puppies from a "cruel" animal shelter that was going to put them to sleep. The Gimp decided to show these puppies just how much he REALLY loved them! Well, push came to shove, and by the end of the day the gimp had made love to every one of these puppies! Now, if you were one of these puppies, wouldn't you rather of had that animal shelter put you to sleep than to have The Gimp make you his love slave? I think so. Now you know what REAL animal cruelty is. STOP ANIMAL RIGHTS PERVERTS! LET THE ANIMALS DIE WITH DIGNITY!

This was an interesting incident. Apparently, a sniper working for the meatatarian underground was hiding in the balcony and decided to take a few shots at the lead singer of this band. See the guy on the left? He's whispering to the singer, "Hey man, you've got a bullet in your head! Does that mean we're supposed to play a rage against the machine song now?" Before the singer had a chance to respond, he fell to the floor dead to the world around him. So, when you think about it, nothing really changed for this particular individual...

Finally, Satan decided to show up in the right place at the right time. Good ol' Satan decided to open up a vortex in the middle of the floor at a recent straight-edge/hardcore show. He sucked down every last one of those chumps right into the pits of hell where they will be forced to smoke, eat meat laced with crack, and burn for eternity. A fitting end for these lost souls, wouldn't you agree? Way to go Satan! Keep up the good work!

Well what's this kid all in a huff about!? Ohhhh, he just realized that a bunch of drunkards discovered his "lowrider bicycle" that he bought for $300 just so that he could act like he was in a gang. Too bad that these drunkards decided to piss and puke all over it, it WAS a nice bike! I can't blame him for being so mad after spending so much of his parents money on that humdinger of a bike! Oh well, I guess he'll have to convert to pogo-sticking like the rest of us normal people.

Onto the next page of hate!