Feb 6th, 2003, 07:54 PM
My Misspent youth.
My Misspent youth.
By Rev. Daniel O’Blivion.
Many years ago before I became a man of the the cloth, several of my friends , & I went out to go cause trouble. Sneaking several beers from my friend Corey’s house we speed off into the night In my buddy Kris’ ‘62 Ford Falcon.
Our First stop that night was to a local grocery store to buy toilet paper, Eggs, & cheap frozen burritos.
While I was busy looking in the frozen food isle the rest of my friends were busy shop lifting (something I’ve never done, & never will). The eight of us piled into the Falcon, & my friends proceeded to drive a few stores down, & steal several flats of plants from the outside of the store’s garden area.
Being quite stoned at the time as I was much of my misspent youth I really had no Idea of what was going on around me. After we were back on the rode for a few minutes I suggested we go skate in the parking lot of FDR, a nearby elementary school. My friends thought it would be fun. As I was busy waxing curbs a few of my friends choose to “Teepee” the trees around the school. We all talked about if we should drive around the soccer field, tearing up the turf while others stood on the hood. We called it “Car Surfing”. I told a few of the guys we should take off now, Leave Corey behind, we did, still with his stolen beer in the trunk.
J.C., the guy who in another year would become my best friend but at this time said nothing, just hung out with us spoke,and said, ”Let’s see if Brian can do anything, we’re short one man, we need numbers!”. J.C. didn’t do drugs, drink, or anything else like that, but it was hard to tell because of how weird he said everything. If I was the voice of reason, J.C. was the little red devil on your shoulder. “Let’s throw those plants we stole at parked cars, we can break into Corey’s house, use his Microwave for the burritos, & lob molten bean and cheese at the passersby’s!” we all agreed thinking it was a good Idea. We went to Corey’s house knowing he wasn’t going to be home for another 30 minutes because of his long walk, & we knew his mother didn’t get off work for another 3 hours.
We sat around Corey’s house drinking his beer, & cooking burritos for about 20 minuets, & left.
We covered many a car with potting soil, & many a people with Mexican food.
We knew if we wanted Brian to come with us he’d have to seek out. The week before Brian had a camp out in his back yard. Kris, & I had brought a cannon made of PVC for shooting tennis balls with butane. Brian’s mother saw several flaming balls land in the front yard, & we we’re all sent home, & Brian was grounded for a month.
We threw burritos at his bedroom window until he opened it, “I Can’t I’m grounded” “What kinda pussy are you?” , I Responded. We all taunted him, & then we saw him head for the downstairs, lights came on, & we heard Brian’s Dad begin to yell. We left.
Out of plants, burritos, & beer we choose to go back to Corey’s house, give him the stuff we stole that night so he wouldn’t be mad, & so we could play AD&D there.
On our way back we were pulled over by police.
Officer 1:Boys, I’d like you all to get out of the car…
Officer 2: Can I see all of your I.D.s?
Officer 1:Mind if we search the car?
Kris: Sure, no problem…I’ll even open the trunk for you.
Officer 1: Great, Gas can, shampoo, flash light, tools. Nothing here…
Officer 2 (shining his flash light into the back seat): what’s this all over the floor?
Kris: Dirt, small gravel, half chewed burrito.
Officer 2: what’s with the dirt, & gravel
J.C.: We were doing yard work for Kris’s dad, We took out the back seat to haul dirt, & gravel.
Kris: we’re putting in flowerbeds, & putting in a path.
Officer 1: that’s small gravel
Me: It’s a small path.
We told the Officer we were just in the nationhood from dropping our friend Brian off at his house, & we were going to our friend Corey’s house to go play Ad&d.
He asked us if that was that nerd game, we hung our heads and told him yes.
He told Kris he should get seatbelts put in the Falcon, Kris told him he couldn’t because he wanted to keep it “stock”. The officers told us the reason they stopped us was there were several teens reported breaking into the nearby Jr. High. We told them we had no Idea about that, & asked if we could go home because we wanted to watch Dennis Leary on Mtv Unplugged that night.
They let us go. We went back to Corey’s, gave him the Booty from that night, Kris threw up in the front yard, & My 5th level mage was killed by a Hydra.