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Marble Marble is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 05:26 PM        Serious Question: Is there a wrong way to Masturbate?
When i jerk off, i rub my penis up against my left thigh...

But when other guys at my work joke around about how they make that up and down movement... i know what they mean, but i can't get off doing that.

And i don't wanna do it the wrong way so when i get into the sack i don't rub my penor against the girls leg!

Is there a wrong way to Masturbate?
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KILLADEUCE KILLADEUCE is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 05:31 PM       
Right. Wrong. It's all just an end to a means. Whatever floats you're boat is the right way i guess hehehe
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Marble Marble is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 05:40 PM       
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Originally Posted by KILLADEUCE
Right. Wrong. It's all just an end to a means. Whatever floats you're boat is the right way i guess hehehe
But... isn't it about what floats her boat? I'm not sure if i can get off going up and down... see what i mean?
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 05:42 PM       
WELL, IF YOU CAN'T GET OFF SHE'LL BE HAPPY WON'T SHE?
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 05:53 PM       
Sandpaper is the wrong way.
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 06:07 PM       
Fucking a vagina is a lot different than fucking your fist. It shouldn't be a problem.
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 07:18 PM       
See a doctor.
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KILLADEUCE KILLADEUCE is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 07:49 PM       
Quote:
But... isn't it about what floats her boat?
Normally i would agree with you 110% and go into a long winded rant about the amusement i get out of giving my Gf oral sex and how i love to watch her squirm, but after this last relationship i just got outa- Nah....

At least for the time being it's all about WHAT I WANT-
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Cap'n Crunch Cap'n Crunch is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 08:04 PM        Re: Serious Question: Is there a wrong way to Masturbate?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marble
But when other guys at my work joke around about how they make that up and down movement...
I hope you don't work at any fast food place. LOL
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 08:26 PM       
"Day-Care Center" or "Retirement Home" would have been funnier.
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 08:27 PM       
OR A SPERM BANK
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Marble Marble is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 08:54 PM        Re: Serious Question: Is there a wrong way to Masturbate?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cap'n Crunch
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marble
But when other guys at my work joke around about how they make that up and down movement...
I hope you don't work at any fast food place. LOL
Dairy Queen. When we blend the blizzards... lol, i was being taught how to do it... "jerk the cup up and down REAL fast, like at home, ha, *nudges* ha, catch my drift"


Yeah, i suppose shit should work out... but i dunno, i'm not fucking my fist, just my thigh... god...
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Cap'n Crunch Cap'n Crunch is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 09:16 PM       
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Originally Posted by Esuohlim
"Day-Care Center" or "Retirement Home" would have been funnier.
Dairy Queen.
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Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Jul 28th, 2003, 09:23 PM       
FUCKING SIGH
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Old Jul 29th, 2003, 02:21 AM       
Use a knife.
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Cosmo Electrolux Cosmo Electrolux is offline
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Old Jul 29th, 2003, 07:57 AM       
if you make several small incisions in your weenster with a razor and then pour alcohol on it, it will enhance the orgasm....yeah.
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The Retro Kat The Retro Kat is offline
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Old Jul 29th, 2003, 02:09 PM       
You crazy fucking goth.
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Gas and masturbation are highly unlikely to be connected with each other. Have you tried to stop masturbating? Has the gas subsided as a result? Perhaps you could try the same experiment by increasing the times you masturbate daily. Do you notice that the gas is increasing?
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Marble Marble is offline
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Old Jul 29th, 2003, 06:57 PM       
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You crazy fucking goth.

Huh?
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Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Jul 29th, 2003, 07:58 PM       
IT'S SHUT UP TIME FOR MARBLE NOW
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Old Jul 30th, 2003, 02:23 AM       
Milhouse is the wrong way to masterbate
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Marble Marble is offline
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Old Jul 30th, 2003, 09:24 AM       
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Originally Posted by Esuohlim
IT'S SHUT UP TIME FOR MARBLE NOW
You don't know who the hell youre talking to, bitch.
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Old Jul 30th, 2003, 10:38 AM       
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Originally Posted by Esuohlim
IT'S SHUT UP TIME FOR MARBLE NOW
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Old Jul 30th, 2003, 03:44 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marble
You don't know who the hell youre talking to, bitch.
Yeah he does, you're the guy who doesn't know how to jerk off.

I wouldn't worry too much, Milhouse. If he chases you his dink will rub against his thigh and he'll be distracted and forget to kill you
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Old Jul 30th, 2003, 04:24 PM       
use peanut-butter cups
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Old Jul 30th, 2003, 05:41 PM       
In fairness, what Marble is talking about is the elusive rubbing maneuver that few men know of. One can rub the cockhead against thigh, stomach or more logically, the palm of a hand. Applying saliva can prevent the cockhead from going numb or painful.
It produces pretty much the same results as the jacking maneuver, except that it takes longer and is a lot more intense. Plus it might not be possible for circumsized men if their cockhead is indeed less less sensitive than with uncircumsized men, but I don't know that. It might just take them even longer.

However, one does not negate the other. You might not immediately get results with the jacking motion if you try it now, but practice makes perfect. It's all stimulating the same organ.

Now I wonder if there will suddenly be a great deal less guys online for the coming weeks.
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