The Halloween Grab Bag!
Kraft Gets Spooky!
by: -RoG-

As the argument about whether vinyl or digital music sounds better continues to rage on amongst audiophiles, I'll never forget the old flexi discs that were included with a variety of cereal boxes and magazines back in the day. The fact that you could have an album built right into a box of cereal which you could then cut out and play on your record player was just too cool for a kid. Sure, nowadays they include compact discs or links to free downloads online to accomplish the same thing, but there was something a bit more special about the flexi discs. They felt more personal, like the companies put some true effort into giving us a real prize to go along with our cereal (Honeycomb cereal in particular had some great Halloween flexi discs).

Hooray for the flexi-discs of yesteryear!

Well, back in 1978, Kraft decided to put out a flexi disc called "A Spooky Sounding Halloween Story" with the intention of educating kids about Halloween Safety and sharing a spooky story with them. As you can see, the recording is imprinted directly onto the promotion and we'll take a listen to that in a minute. But first, I wanted to quickly share their safety tips on the back of the disc:

Safety first!

Kraft made some good treats 'n all, but I think receiving a box of their mac 'n cheese while trick-or-treating would've been far more exciting for any kid. As for the safety tips, my personal favorite is number 4 which boldly states: "Don't go to the homes of strangers, and don't go into a stranger's home." Let that sink in for a minute. Don't go into the homes of strangers AND don't go into a stranger's home. These are two very different things, so I hope you remember both of them when you go out trick-or-treating this season. Number 7 could be misconstrued as telling kids to eat candies without even removing the wrappers, so they probably should've worded it a little better. I'm also not sure how number 8 "And now that you know how to have a safe Halloween - have a great Halloween!" is a safety tip in any way whatsoever.

Now as for the "Spooky Sounding Halloween Story" itself, it's a pretty straightforward setup with grandpa telling his granddaughter Melissa a spooky tale along with some typical spooky sound effects at the end. What's funny is how any chance of this tale being remotely spooky is ruined by the constant safety rule interjections. When he talks about going into the vacant house across the street, you immediately think about it being haunted, until grandpa start blabbing about waiting for the light to turn green before crossing the street to walk to the house. Kinda kills the mood they were trying to establish, ya know? That and the blatant advertisement for Kraft candies at the end of the story. Just hit the play button below and you too can experience this spooky old flexidisc without the use of a record player... IF YOU DARE!

Have any questions or comments about this piece?


If you enjoyed this piece, be sure to check out:

Watch The Blob With -RoG-!
Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark!

Reader Comments

Forum Virgin
Sep 21st, 2009, 07:02 AM
Now I know that I should never "go into the homes of strangers OR go into a stranger's home." And knowing is half the battle.
hanging out
Sep 21st, 2009, 11:17 AM
you misread it and being deliberately obtuse. ITs "don't go to the homes of strangers or go into a stranger's home. they are different but if you do the first thing the second thing is not an issue.
Forum Virgin
Sep 21st, 2009, 03:14 PM
all they need are some halloween shaped noodles and their good to go!
Destructo Bear
Sep 21st, 2009, 03:24 PM
i've never been to a Strangers Home, but Kraft put the idea of going to one in my head. Curse the Cheesy Goodness that put a idea that they do not suggest!
Sep 21st, 2009, 04:24 PM
When I read the safety tips I can't stop thinking about those flicks about Halloween Safety for which you have made reviews, -RoG-. They have a lot of things in common and I can only guess that KRAFT had something to do with them.
Cranberry Everything
Sep 21st, 2009, 05:23 PM
Great find -RoG-! I'm amazed those things survived. That thin little piece of cardboard surviving 30 years? Must have been well cared for.
the axe and the smasher
Sep 21st, 2009, 05:40 PM
I miss the old records like that. NEwer mp3's and CDs just don't have the same charm as popping a record of the back of cereal.
Forum Virgin
Sep 21st, 2009, 06:46 PM
So wait, when it says "Don't go to the homes of strangers", does that mean you can only go to people's houses that you know? I can understand not going into strangers houses, but not trick or treating at their houses? I thought you were supposed to go to random houses and get candy, even if you don't know who lives there.
Pickled Patriarch
Sep 21st, 2009, 07:13 PM
Originally Posted by sebastiankirchoff93 View Post
I thought you were supposed to go to random houses and get candy, even if you don't know who lives there.
Yes, but what if you go up to those houses and the owner says, "Oh sure! I have plenty of candy for you! It's all in the kitchen back there. Why don't you step inside and help yourself to all the candy you like!"

What do you do then, Sebastian? WHAT DO YOU DO THEN??????

(yes... this is a test.)
Sep 21st, 2009, 07:42 PM
I would put out a PSA telling people the dangers of letting unknown kids in masks into your house. The all have guns and anger and listen to the loud music and wouldn't even wipe their feet before entering.
An Arizona Horror Company
Sep 21st, 2009, 08:08 PM
I woulda loved to get some good old Kraft "cheese product" in the trick-or-treating bag, back inna day. That would have been better than taffy, man...
You'll thank me later...
Sep 21st, 2009, 08:49 PM
And y'know...those MP3 giveaways, so impersonal, and it's not even "free" you have to go online and (I can only assume) jump through all these hoops...

It's like hunting, even if you "win" and kill a deer, your reward is having to do all this extra shit.
Hunting is totally for suckers.
Pickled Patriarch
Sep 21st, 2009, 09:46 PM
Originally Posted by Desert_Screams View Post
I woulda loved to get some good old Kraft "cheese product" in the trick-or-treating bag, back inna day. That would have been better than taffy, man...
I actually gave a little kid, who was maybe 6 or 7 years old at best, a full box of spaghetti one year because I ran out of candy. His eyes lit up and he went running back to him mom waving the box like it was the greatest treat in the entire world. Easily one of my favorite Halloween memories.
lurking on the walls
Sep 21st, 2009, 09:58 PM
Who wouldn't RoG? It's not just candy it's a whole frigging meal!!!!

actually i'm a college student and I'd like a box of spaghetti noodles LOL

interesting addition to a Halloween thread though.... I never even knew flexi disks ever existed... it's like the 45 records (can't beat the classics)
Strange blob from beyond
Sep 22nd, 2009, 02:54 AM
I remember in the UK, White Dwarf magazine (a games workshop one for those who don't know) gave a flexi disk of a thrash band called Sabbat with a track called "Blood for the blood God". Now THAT was a flexi disk
Unfunny Python Reference
Sep 22nd, 2009, 12:11 PM
"Don't go to the homes of strangers, and don't go into a stranger's home."

Are they Pirate Ghost or Ghost Pirates?
Sep 24th, 2009, 03:42 AM
Strangers have the best candy, though.
Zombie Foot
Sep 24th, 2009, 04:58 PM
I have a friend who does that every year-- he gives out macaroni and cheese, ramen, canned vegetables, etc. He thinks it's hilarious, and to date so do all of the kids who trick or treat his place. He stocks up specifically those items for trick or treaters.
Forum Virgin
Oct 14th, 2009, 11:22 PM
That's right, kids- only trick or treat at your own house and those of your best friends and immediate neighbors. Enjoy your 7 to 10 pieces of candy, because that's all you're getting until next year.

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