The Greatest Horror Movie Moments!
by: Dr. Boogie


Slither was a good movie, but it didn't do so well when it was in theaters. This was partly due to it being pretty much the same movie as Night of the Creeps, but was also due to the movie being about a meteor that falls to earth and unleashes killer slugs that take over people's bodies, a la Night of the Creeps. Could the absence of Tom Atkins have been a factor? Who can say?

(It was.)

Nevertheless, Slither has one thing Night of the Creeps didn't, and it brings us this particular Horror Moment:

Hey, his barn door's wide open! *checks zipper*

When local rich guy Grant Grant unexpectedly mutates into a bloodthirsty monster, Sheriff Bill organizes a posse to... bring him in for questioning. He needs answers to two questions in particular: why is he stealing/killing animals, and what happened to Brenda Gutierrez?

Little does he know, he's about to have an answer to both questions.

The hot light at Krispy Creme just wouldn't turn off!
"Something's wrong with me."

It's the understatement of the century. The posse is caught somewhere between disgust and awe at the sight of Brenda's titanic girth. Bill manages to ask the million dollar question: "So... what's going on here, exactly?"

Undoubtedly, Brenda wants to tell him about Grant coming to her house days ago and stabbing her in the gut with a couple of tentacles, and how he's been keeping her on a diet of raw meat in the barn for days. Unfortunately, all she can think about is how much she wants another bite of the nearby possum.

Bill tries to reassure her that a trip to the hospital will clear everything up (although his partner wonders aloud what a hospital could do for... whatever it is they're looking at). Suddenly, Brenda starts groaning and shifting about in a way that makes everyone very uncomfortable.

I can... almost... see... my feet!

I'm not sure how much incentive I would need to run away from something like this, but it's not enough for these stalwart souls. Neither are the loud tearing sounds coming from Brenda's enormous flank.

The jokes in this movie are positively side-splitting!

And neither does Brenda's declaration, "those little fuckers are tearing me APAAAAART!!!" Bill starts to put things together when he notices the severely mutated Grant out one of the windows, but shortly after he realizes they've been led into a trap, the trap is sprung.

Ah, the miracle of life.

"Slug flood" has got to be high on the list of bad ways to go, but Bill manages to survive by not letting the slugs get in his mouth. Sadly, none of his companions have the forethought to prevent the killer slugs from getting in that way. One actually listens to him when he warns them to cover their mouths, but his sweetheart Starla fails to close her damn mouth AND falls over. Fortunately, Bill has a plan.

It's not a good plan.

Just lay back and think of England.

At first, they seem quite doomed, but the slugs quickly lose interest and slither off. A short time later, the entire town is wiped out because no one else could keep their mouths shut. This is why I strongly encourage all children to keep their mouths shut at all times. No excuses. Excuses only enrage the killer slugs.

Hey, you ripped off my shirt buttons!

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