Columbine Schmolumbine!

Oh he brought you to school alright. But if you thought he was gonna let you show off to all your classmates, you were sorely mistaken. First Deniro killed off all of your classmates, thus making your attempt at redeeming yourself of last year's Halloween costume failure a complete waste of time. Then, he killed you as well. You're so smart!

I guess we can look on the bright side though, this was the first school shooting in recent years that wasn't committed by an actual student. Then again, if this becomes one of Mr. Deniro's new habits, a lot of people out there had better SERIOUSLY consider at-home-education.

START OVER, YOU IDIOT!