A little black paint and no one will know the difference.

You put your resourceful ex-con brain to use, and come up with the idea of hijacking the radio station a la Airheads. After a brief stopover at the dollar store to buy a toy gun and some black spray paint to make it more realistic-looking, you make your way back to the station. The receptionist gives you a nasty look and a distant, “what can I do for you?” You respond by pointing the gun in her face and telling her to put you on the air toot sweet. You then revise your statement because “toot sweet,” doesn’t sound like something a hijacker would say.

She shows you to the booth. You burst in and pistol-whip the DJ when he tries to stop you. You notice that the gun left a little strip of black paint on the DJ’s forehead, so you roll him over, hoping the receptionist didn’t notice it as well. You step over to the mike to make your announcement. As you are giving directions to your house, the reception runs off. You decide to ignore it, as you’ve finished making the announcement, and now it’s time to go. You catch her as she finishes making a call to the police. You just laugh, assured that they won’t reach the station before you leave, and show her that you didn’t even have a real gun. You ask her if she’s seen the movie Airheads, but she says no, citing that from commercials and movie reviews, it sounded extremely stupid and far-fetched. You blush, and tell her to shut up before making your way out the door.

Outside, to your surprise, you find a single squad car with two police officers just stepping out of it. They spot you holding the toy gun in your hand, and tell you to drop it or they’ll open fire. You try to explain to them that it’s just a toy, but when you try to drop it, you find that the spray paint has dried and effectively glued it to your hand. Now the officers are getting very nervous, and they tell you that this is your finally warning to drop the gun. Finally, at the last minute, you pry the gun off your hand and drop it on the ground. Satisfied that they have subdued you, the first officer comes up to handcuff you and read you your rights. Before he does, you ask him how he got down here so fast. As it turns out, the two police officers had driven down to the station to try and win some free AC/DC tickets during their lunch break. You laugh and tell them that AC/DC sucks. The other officer’s face goes completely red. He says to his partner that you are “resisting arrest,” then proceeds to draw his gun and shoot you in the face.

YOU'RE ON A "HIGHWAY TO HELL", BETTER START OVER!