A Monster Party. Sure, you could throw a party like the one pictured above, but a house that bops up and down is hard to come by (unless mudslides are common in your area). A cat who'll take a crap on your roof, however, is not. Still, if you're going to host a real monster party this year, you had better do it right. If you don't, you might receive a beating worse than the one from last year when you went trick or treating, dressed as Hitler. Sure, you were trying to make fun of the guy 'n all, but come on... you were asking for it by dressing up like that.

Anyway, the first thing you need to do to throw a good Halloween Monster Party is to get the supplies. You can't just hang a fake spider from the ceiling, invite some people over, and call it a "monster party". No, no, no... you've gotta go ALL OUT with the decorations and the food. Keep in mind, your guests are coming to YOUR party instead of going out and getting FREE CANDY from complete strangers. If you fuck up, they're going to hold you personally responsible.

That being said, it's time to decide where to go buy some of the initial spooky decorative supplies.

You decide to:

• Go to Wal-Mart and head straight for the Halloween section.
   
• Go to Toys-R-Us and see what Halloweeny goodness they've got.
   
• Go to the seasonal Halloween shop that only opens for a few months each year.
   
• Go to a big Halloween web site to order all of your supplies from so you don't have to even leave your home.