You take the briefcase and ease it open as Herman says, “Hey, don’t, you have to set the timer with the combination lock before you open it otherwise-"

And there’s a bomb inside and it goes off and you don’t even have time to think about what a fucknut you are.

PINHEAD!

I mean, come on! "Ticky"? What did you think was inside? I mean, Jesus bleeding Christ in a sidecar screwing a midget hobo with a thighmaster, what are you, some kind of pinhead? Put the book down. You’re not good enough for a Choose Your Own Adventure book.

Or…

GO BACK TO THE BEGINNING, YOU FRIGGIN’ BAG OF PORK RINDS!!