IT'S HIGH
TIME I PAMPER MYSELF WITH A TRIP TO THE SALON. THERE'S NOTHING QUITE LIKE
GETTING A NEW DO FOR YOUR HELMET. WHAT'S THAT YOU SAY?? WHAT DO YOU MEAN
MY HELMET WON'T FIT IN IT!?!?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
OK WELL,
AT LEAST MY PERSONAL STYLIST WON'T DO ME WRONG. HUH? YOU WANT TO TRY OUT A
NEW STYLE FOR MY HELMET? AGGGGHH! STOP THAT! THAT'S GOING TO LOOK
HORRIBLE!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
I LIKE
GUMBALLS! I LIKE GUMBALLS! I LIKE GUMBALLS!
I LIKE TO
PUT THEM IN MY MOUTH. HEY! WAIT A MINUTE! THE GUMBALLS WON'T FIT THROUGH
THE GRATING IN MY MASK!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
A PENNY
FOR A WISH? WHAT A DEAL! I WISH I MAY. I WISH I MIGHT. I WISH THE MOST
SEXY PERSON IN THE WORLD WOULD APPEAR BEFORE ME SO THAT WE COULD GO DO THE
THINGS THAT SEXY PEOPLE DO.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
WHAT A
BEAUTIFUL DAY TO GO FOR A STROLL WITH MY HAPPY ICE CREAM CONE! IT'S GONNA
BE SO TASTY AND COOL AND I WILL BE HAPPY FOREVER ALL BECAUSE OF THIS ICE
CREAM CONE.
OH MY
GOD! NOT MY ICE CREAM CONE! NOT THAT!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
SWINGING
IS FUN! WEEEEEEEEEEE! OK, NOW DON'T PUSH ME TOO HARD OK? HEY, YOU'RE
PUSHING ME TOO HARD! STOP IT! YOU'RE PUSHING TOO HAAAAARRRRRDDD!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
I'M GOING
TO BUY SOME SEXY LINGERIE SO THAT I CAN MAKE THE NEXT LADY I DATE LOOK ALL
SEXY. BECAUSE SEXY IS GOOD AND IF YOU WANT THE SEX YOU GOTTA MAKE 'EM LOOK
SEXY, RIGHT? THIS STUFF SURE LOOKS SEXY! I'M GONNA GO BUY IT NOW BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT
US GROWN-UPS DO. WE BUY SEXY THINGS FROM THE SEXY SHOPS.
WHAT DO
YOU MEAN MY CREDIT CARD WAS DECLINED!?!?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
WELL AT
LEAST I CAN HAVE MY DARTH DEW SLURPEE! IT'S THE GREATEST SLURPEE EVER
INVENTED! SO COOL. SO REFRESHING ON A HOT SUMMER DAY!
OH MY
GOD! NOT THE BRAIN FREEZE! AGH! MY HELMET!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
MY
FRIENDS AND I LIKE TO GO TO RESTAURANTS AND EAT THE FOODS. BUT DON'T ASK
ME HOW I CAN FIT THIS LASAGNA IN MY MASK WHEN I COULDN'T FIT THE GUMBALL
THROUGH IT, BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN THIS STORY HAS PLOT HOLES! BOY OH BOY
I SURE DO LOVE THIS TASTY LASAGNA, HOW ABOUT YOU GUYS?
WHY DID
THE WAITER GIVE ME THE CHECK?? WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO PAY FOR ALL OF
YOUR MEALS BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T BRING ANY MONEY!?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
SAY BABY,
SINCE DARTH PAID FOR YOUR DINNER 'N STUFF, WHAT SAY YOU GIMME A KISS?
OH YEAH!
DARTH GETS ALL THE LADIES! BUT WAIT!
I WANT TO
*FEEL* THIS KISS. BETTER TAKE MY MASK OFF SO I CAN GET A GOOD SMOOCH!
OK, NOW
WHERE WERE WE? AH YES, TIME FOR A KISS!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
See what I
mean folks? Darth Vader says, "Nooooooooo!" all the time, so he was only
doing what came natural to him in Episode III. Maybe next time you won't
be so quick to judge... he's obviously got it rough enough as it is.
help support I-Mockery by supporting our sponsors:
I'd like to take this chance to thank my pals over at Fright Catalog
for donating
the amazing
Supreme Edition Darth Vader Mask and Helmet set to us.
If you're interested in getting any kind of costumes, marks, 'n more...
check 'em out!
