...CONTINUED
if you haven't read pages 1-3 of our
Halloween Candies yet, click here!
Pirates Of
The Caribbean Gummy Skulls!
These were
possibly the hardest gummy candies I've had all year. I don't mean that
like they're old and rock solid, that's not the case at all, they're just
extremely hard to bite chunks out of. The taste of each one is pretty
bland, so unless you just like how those skull 'n crossbones look (and I
admit, they are nifty lookin), I'd pass these up. But let's face it, there
are probably thousands of teenage girls (and a handful of boys) out there
that will buy these simply because heartthrobs Johnny Depp and Orlando
Bloom are on the package. Sex sells... even when it's attached to skull 'n
crossbones.
out of 5 pumpkin candles
White Chocolate Pumpkin & Skull!
Out of all
the treats I've purchased so far this Halloween season, I gotta give
Galerie's White Chocolate Pumpkins and Skulls the award for the best
looking candies of 2007. No, your eyes aren't playing tricks on you,
those really are chocolates. At 3 bux a pop, they're not cheap, but
consider what you're getting for that 3 bux. The detail put into these
things is almost unheard of when it comes to store-bought stuff. It even
reads "Not A Toy!" on the back of the package because they
knew some people would buy 'em thinking that they were getting Halloween
decorations or something. As far as the white chocolate goes, we've all
tasted it before and you're either a fan of it or you're not. Me, I like
white chocolate, but I like how these things look MUCH more and there's no
way in hell I'm going to ruin 'em just to fill up me gullet. I'm more than
happy to just leave them in their little display cubes forever as there's
no reason to eat these works of art unless there's a food shortage... and
even then, I'd probably just eat one of my own limbs rather than ruin
these beauties.
out of 5 full moons
Ausome
Halloween Jelly Pops!
These jelly
pops certainly look awesome (or "ausome" according to the brand name) and
you'd think they were made purely of marshmallow at first, but the
lollipop part is more like sour gummy candies (like Sour Patch Kids). Then
the decorations on each pop are made of a hardened sugary icing that
doesn't seem all that different from something you'd find on a gingerbread
house. It's a bit too sweet to eat in just once sitting, but they're
pretty damned good nonetheless.
out of 5 slices of pumpkin pie
Gourmet
Candy Corn!
Last year I reviewed the awful Cherry, Green Apple and Tangerine
flavored "gourmet" candy corns. This year, they've returned but with one
new flavor in the mix that didn't sound too bad at first - Toffee
flavor. And you know what? They're actually not bad at all! I still
prefer regular candy corn, but I've always a big fan of Bit-O-Honey
candies back in the day too and these taste very much like 'em. It's good
to see they've somewhat redeemed themselves with a good new flavor after
the ones from last year were anything but "gourmet". They're still making
those nasty flavored ones too, but I'm gonna just close my eyes and
pretend it was all a bad dream.
out of 5 Pennywise clowns
Pop Rocks
Pumpkin Patch Orange
& Rich Milk Chocolate!
Pop Rocks
are back this Halloween with their "Pumpkin Patch Orange" flavor once
again and a new limited edition flavor - Rich Milk Chocolate "With A
Kick". Not sure what that flavor has to do with Halloween, but it was
right the shelf with the pumpkin packs, and who am I to discriminate when
it comes to candy? The pumpkin
patch version is how pop rocks are supposed to look. The orange 'n green
colors are a nice touch, and they pop like crazy in your mouth. The orange
flavor, however, leaves something to be desired as I was always more of a
fan of the cherry Pop Rocks.
out of 5 mad scientists (for the Pumpkin Patch Orange Pop Rocks)
The Rich
Milk Chocolate Pop Rocks are literally clumps of chocolate with Pop Rocks
mixed into them. The chocolate is decent enough I suppose, but I can't say
it's a great combination. What's worse is that it doesn't even pop in your
mouth anywhere nearly as much as normal Pop Rocks do, which is usually the
whole point of eating them to begin with. You want that popping sensation
when you chow down on these things, and when they don't deliver, you feel
cheated (especially since it says it's chocolate "with a kick" on the
package). Well, I guess it's a good thing that the chocolate Pop Rocks are
a "limited edition", because I can't imagine they'd sell very much in the
long run once everybody's had a taste.
out of 5 grim reapers (for the Rich Milk Chocolate Pop Rocks)
Spooky Wonka Nerds Rope
!
There's really nothing bad I can say about Spooky Nerds
Ropes (or any Nerds Ropes for that matter). They're tasty, tangy as hell
and the package decorations for their "spooky" ropes are top notch with
orange, purple and white nerds dressed up in various costumes including
mummies, wolfmen, witches and vampires. And of course, the actual ropes
are covered in orange, purple and white nerds to keep the same Halloween theme
going. If you find a house that's giving these out on Halloween, bring as
many costume changes with you that night as possible so you can keep going back to
get more ropes to eat. Either that or lie to all the other trick-or-treaters and tell
them Nerds Ropes are disgusting and that you feel bad for them so you'll
trade them some "good" candy for their Nerds Ropes. Of course, if you do
that, you run the risk of them calling you on your b.s. and then they
might strangle you with said ropes. Still, if you gotta kick the bucket, I
can think of far worse ways to go than with a Nerds Rope around your
neck.
out of 5 vampire bats
Harry
Potter Blood Pops!
Looks pretty
delicious doesn't it? Yeah, I thought the same thing too. I thought this
thing would taste almost exactly like a strawberry, or at the very least,
much better than your average strawberry lollipop. Sadly, this just isn't
the case. They're just extremely bland strawberry flavored pops... barely
even sweet at all really. So bland, in fact, that I'd guess that the
wrapper has more flavor to it. But what about the blood? Yeah, what about
it indeed. There's nothing bloody about them at all. You'd think that
little wizard would've been able to conjure up a spell to make his blood
pops taste good or bleed a little. Simply put, this is Harry Potter and
the Goblet of SUCK.
out of 5 Zombie heads
Mad Lab
Crazy Candy Chemistry!
Wow, between
this and the shrunken head beakers from the previous page, you won't even
need to buy extra decorations to create a mad scientist laboratory. The
Crazy Candy Chemistry set is part of the new Edgar & Ellen product
line that's been all the rage at Target this Halloween season. And while
they're slapping the E&E logo on all sorts of stuff that we've seen from
generic brands in Halloween shops in the past, this is definitely
something new... and there's enough sugar here to power the sun. And yes,
the sun is powered by sugar. Don't question my logic. I'm allllll into
science and I know this to be a fact.
Each test
tube comes with a different candy for you to test out. Ok, so the two
vials of Orange and Green Ooze are basically the same thing, just
different flavors and each are almost too sweet to handle. Trust me when I
say you definitely won't be finishing these in one sitting... or ten. I
would've liked to see them mix it up a bit more instead of having two
tubes with "ooze" in them. I'm sure they could've come up with something
different to put in the fourth tube... beast boogers, vampire bat
droppings... something.
Well anyway,
the Crushed Bones powder has a really nice grape flavor, much like the
kind of stuff you'd find in a packet of Fun Dip (minus the piece of edible
chalk). And last but not least, the Extreme Rocks are nothing more than
orange flavored pop rocks - which is pretty much the one flavor of Pop
Rocks that I don't care for as mentioned earlier on this page with the
Pumpkin ones. Still, they've made a very nice presentation for this set of
lab candies, and you'll have some cool lookin' test tubes to put on display with
all your Halloween decorations when it's all said 'n done.
out of 5 puzzle boxes
Glow-In-The-Dark Gloomy Glasses
With Candy!
Finally,
somebody had the foresight to create a product for those of you who've
always wanted to combine your trick-or-treating with a trip to the
optometrist. In each pack, you'll get a bag of bone candies and some
plastic Halloween glasses. The candy is somewhat like Sweet Tarts, just a
bit more mild. It's also weird because, for a hard candy, they're
extremely easy to bite into... hardly giving any resistance whatsoever.
The real selling point with these, however, is obviously the glasses...
I should
note that the glasses do glow-in-the-dark nicely, but you can't see the
designs on 'em well enough like that. Out of the two available pairs, I
gotta go with the vampire skull glasses... who in their right mind would
pass up the opportunity to wear skulls with bloody fangs? Not I, that's
for damned sure... not I.
out of 5 grim reapers (for the Rich Milk Chocolate Pop Rocks)
out of 5 Zombie heads
