I-Mockery
Please don't feed PickleMan
Please don't feed PickleMan
About Us Store Advertising Contact New to I-Mockery? Register an account and join in the pickled fun! New to I-Mockery? Register an account and join in the pickled fun!
 

 

ACQUAINTANCES OR ANNOYANCES
by: -RoG-

"Hey! How's it going?", "Hi there!", "Hello"...do these things sound familiar? Of course they do! Whenever you hear these words spoken, or speak them yourself, chances are you've run in with an acquaintance. Acquaintances are basically the people whom you met for a split second at one point in your life and you say something like "hello" every time you see them from that point onward. Sure, it's a kind gesture which contains all of that "common courtesy" crapola and blah blah blah. I say it's pointless. Chances are this person who is greeting you is someone who accidentally dropped a gallon of milk on your foot in 7-11, and that's how you came to meet them. Inside you really have much animosity towards this person, but instead you always find yourself replying to their stupid greeting with, "Oh I'm fine! How are you?" The real bad thing about all of this is that it's normally when you are walking by them. It's basically a 5 second conversation.

So why is it important to say hi to everyone? If the person is your friend that you hangout with on a regular basis, then you have a valid reason to acknowledge their existence every now and then. Otherwise, I see no real reason to say anything. There's always that person who keeps count of all the people he can say hello to. It makes him happy to think that he has so many "friends". This is just that person's way of reassuring himself that he actually knows people. But I bet deep down inside it pisses him off to think that he never really hangout with all of those people he says "hey" to. Kryste, if everybody I've said hi to during my life was an actual friend, I could probably have a good chance at running for president. I don't find these people important in my life in any way, shape or form. You probably have that one friend who everyone seems to know and they all say hello to him and it makes you jealous to think that he knows so many people. But think about it...chances are that he hangs out with 1 or 2 out of the 30 people that greet him. Why? BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL JUST ACQUAINTANCES.

Acquaintances don't do anything with you really. They just walk by you and say hello. That is it! End of story! Friends are people whom you hangout with all the time, eat meals with, complain about everything with, rob banks with, commit multiple homicides with, and any of the other few pleasantries in life with. Acquaintances don't do jack with you. Sure, sometimes they happen to be in the same room because they are friends with one of your friends, but the two of you really have nothing to say to each other except "hey, what's up?" "Oh nothing really" "Yeah same here" "Oh well..." And the blabbering about pointless stuff goes on and on. Most of the time you can't even remember the person's name, I know I can't. I know I haven't known the names of AT LEAST 80% of the people I've ever said "hi" to. I know, I know...you don't want to be mean and not acknowledge them. Even I say "hello" to the people who acknowledge me. I'm just stating the fact that I think it's annoying and that there is really no purpose for acquaintances. They are just people who pass you by and say a short phrase. So what? Who cares? I think one of the main causes of noise pollution is the thousands of people walking in clustered cities saying hello to each other. You can try to justify it to yourself all you want...when it comes right down to it, acquaintances have no function. Why do you think some people become hermits? Because, they got really angry at the fact that all they ever did was say hi to people and then spend their entire days at home with nothing to do and nobody to hangout with. (in a hearty voice) "Well I just know a lot people so that I have allies!" Why? Are you planning on going to war? I don't think so. And if our country goes to war against some other country, tons of people who have never even met each other will join forces to protect America. You don't need allies so shut up.

"But you could hang out with those people that you say hi to if you really wanted to!" Yeah, I suppose that is true...IF I REALLY WANTED TO. Why do you think they are saying hi? So they won't seem like an asshole, but at the same time, they are hoping that you won't follow them and try hanging out. Why? Because they really don't want to hangout with you either just like you don't really want to hangout with them. "You're just not nice! I want to say hello to all of those people!" Yeah, that's an easy one to analyze. I'm willing to bet that the only reason you WANT to say hello to them is because you know where they work. They probably work at a food establishment or some other places that could prove to be beneficial to you. "Hey man! How ya doin? Say...ummm...you think you could get me some of that food for free?" Yeah we've all played that game before haven't we? We have our real friends to give us the benefits of their jobs, but some people can't stop there. They have to know more and more people that they can leech off of. Then, once that person has been fired, you never even talk to them ever again because they can't help you anymore. Yeah, I know exactly why you want to say hello to all of those people. ADMIT IT! I do, I've done it before, and I admit it proudly. The way I figure it, is that it is the LEAST they can do since they annoy me every day by saying "Hey! What's new?" and all that other lingo.

You might be one of those pain in the neck people who, for some sick reason, has to HUG everyone you see. I hate those people. "Hi! How have ya been! Come here and gimme a big hug! I missed you so much! awwww!" Please. Not only does that normally annoy the hell out of the person being hugged, but it shows how desperate the hugger is for physical contact with another human being. If you are one of these people you need to get help. As much as I hate the idea of drugs being used to treat psychological problems, I think they should create some kind of treatment that instantly makes the person puke whenever they get the idea of hugging someone into their head. You know, just like in the movie Clockwork Orange where the guy gets really sick whenever a sadistic thought enters his noggin. Screw it, they should just make a therapy that kills the person as soon as they get the urge to say "hey there!" to someone they hardly even know.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again:
ACQUAINTANCES ARE WORTHLESS.


SUGGEST THIS TO A FRIEND!
Recipient Email Address:
Your Name:
Your Email Address:
      

Come talk about this piece in our forums!

Back To Visionary Darkness Main





[Minimocks] [Articles] [Games] [Mockeries] [Shorts] [Comics] [Blog] [Info] [Forum] [Advertise] [Home]


Copyright © 1999-2007 I-Mockery.com : All Rights Reserved : (E-mail)
No portion of I-Mockery may be reprinted in any form without prior consent
We reserve the right to swallow your soul... and spit out the chewy parts.