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WHY RAVES MUST BE DESTROYED
by: -RoG-

I went to my first (and only) rave a little while ago (it was called FLIGHT™ for those of you who care or were unfortunate enough to be at it too)....IT WAS ONE OF THE MOST PATHETIC THINGS I HAVE EVER WITNESSED. I had been to the Trocadero, in Philadelphia, once before and saw a computer music type band, Sister Machine Gun, play there and it was one of the best shows I've ever seen. Unfortunately, this trip to the Troc was nothing like the last one. I'm just glad it's over with. I got sick after I got back from the rave because of all the damned smoke and crap that surrounded me while I was there. The only reason I even went was to do a report on it for a music class I was taking at the time.

Everyone at the rave seemed to single me out as "The guy who must be a drug dealer". I guess I have "the drug dealer look" because I was standing up against the wall with like 20 other people standing right next to me. But people would walk up to ONLY ME and ask me if I had any acid or weed or "extasy" (I hope I spelled that right and didn't offend any of you people who do that stuff. Wait what am I saying, I hope I pissed you off BIG TIME if I spelled it incorrectly. DIE DRUGGIE DIE!). I don't know what I did that made people think I was a drug dealer, but that only made the evening more annoying. I had to stay from midnight until roughly 6am at the thing. It was also the WORST techno music I have ever heard, it was so basic it wasn't even funny. It was mostly repetitive drum beats, you know, the typical "THUD THUD THUD THUD" drum beat. And then there was plenty o' bass to accompany it. This is why I hated the music. Most techno music I've listened to has a lot more keyboards and changes in it, but this music just bored the hell out of me.

One of the DJ's got in a fight with someone too because some guy bumped his table and made one of the tracks skip or something...Which was funny because everyone at the raves are supposed to be "high 'n happy" and kind to each other (just like those damned hippies). I actually noticed that most ravers, but not all, take A LOT of offense to my sarcastic/criticizing remarks about the rave. One of my friends, who I won't name because he'd probably get mad if I mentioned his name, got in an argument with me recently. It's fine because he can take my remarks and all, but we argued this point: He believes raves are far from being "mainstream™" and I do not. First of all, I don't think there is anything wrong with being mainstream, but he really got serious when we argued this point. When I see THAT many people going to rave's all the time, I'd say it's mainstream, just like a lot of the music I listen to. So I don't see any problem with that. I'm always amused with those people who try their hardest to find the worst music in the world to listen to just so they can say, "At least I'm not mainstream". Come on folks, How stupid is that? Listen to what sounds good to you. Oh well, back to the rave itself.

I had people trying to give me acid stickers, some guy actually tried to put one on me to force me to try to get me high (probably so he could steal my wallet or something), but I shoved him out of the way and threatened to kill him if he did it again. We also had to wait in line for an hour just to get into the thing and it was sub-zero temperatures with the wind chill. Plus it started raining, ugh... I'm just glad I was on the guest list so I didn't have to pay the 10 bux that everyone else had to do. I would have been even angrier had I paid 10 bux for that huge waste of time. You know, I've heard classical music makes you smarter and it's good to listen to when you study. Well I think the music that was played at this club had just the opposite effect. I couldn't believe some of the morons at this thing. People tried to look different as they possibly could (which made them all the same in fact). There were stupid girls with barely anything on and then they're standing outside in line wondering why they are so cold (hopefully they got pneumonia).

I must admit, there were some humorous times during the evening. You know those glow-sticks that you bend and then they glow with a neon green color for a long time? The same things that kids carry around with them on Halloween and stuff. Well one guy had one of them in his mouth to make himself look really weird. Actually, I saw a few people with them in their mouths, but this guy made quite a big mistake. He didn't take into account that he might accidentally chew on it....so it burst and he had tons of glowing green drool coming out of his mouth mouth and ran outside. That was the last I saw of him. I can't tell you how funny it was seeing the green stuff drip from his mouth. I think that green stuff is toxic too, isn't it? It had to be one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen in my life.

My friend had a nice scare when he was sitting against the wall as a cockroach climbed down his shirt. I guess that was his cue to stop standing against the wall with me, cuz he went to dance or something. Oh yeah, the dancing. Besides that I think dancing is a stupid thing to begin with, the club owners LET EVERYONE into this rave. I believe they even sold extra tickets at the door that night. Some of the people were too young to be around all those drugs anyway. Then again, nobody should have to be around that shite at any age if ya ask me. So, it was WAY too overcrowded and everyone was wondering why they had no room to dance. They should have just said, "Forget this, if we can't dance, lets hurt each other!" and started a mosh pit instead. Although I think moshing is really stupid too, it would have been amusing to see a bunch of people that were "tripping" trying to push and shove and kill each other. I can see that guy with the glow-stick in his mouth getting shoved in the mosh pit and then accidentally swallowing the thing and winds up with a glowing stomach for the rest of his life.

I don't mean to compare this Flight™ rave to all the other raves, I'm sure there are some where people can say they had a good time. I'm sure there are raves that I might find the music to be better because much of the music I listen to is computer-influenced (if not totally computer-generated). Still, this rave is all I really wanted/needed to know about the activities that go on during a rave. At least, it backed up my hatred for the mixing of drugs and dancing even more. I'm sure most people that are into raves and stuff will not appreciate this article in the least bit, but would you rather me lie to ya? I mean, even most of the people at this rave thought it was a bad one. We're talking about people who go to rave's 2-3 times a week most of the time. They thought it was bad, so I guess it was my horrible luck that I happened to be at the worst rave in the history of the world. Honestly though, I have heard MUCH better techno music than I heard at this one. Ok that's all that I have to say about raves. I'm gonna go read the paper now and see if there are any good bagpipe bands coming around here anytime soon! Aye!


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