Advice column hilarity.

[Kitsa]

Greenwich, Conn.: My husband and I went on a long weekend vacation to celebrate our anniversary.
Trying to relive our honeymoon, we ordered an in-room couples massage from a reputable establishment in the area. When our masseuse showed up, she was a—to put it lightly, a working girl and proceeded to lay across our hotel bed offering her services. This took us by surprise and we immediately ran into the bathroom to discuss how to kindly ask this woman to leave.
My husband went out to the room and asked her to leave but she wouldn't without $300 in cash for her time—which he gave.
Was this the right thing for us to do? Should we have given her money or forced her to leave?
We were also a little traumatized by the event and have had some trouble "getting over it."
Any advice?
Thanks, Prudish But Progressive
Emily Yoffe: Maybe this "reputable establishment" is used to getting calls from politicians, and so it had a different idea of what's involved in releasing stress than you and your husband had in mind. No, you should not have had to pay for the young lady's services—unless she developed a sudden expertise in shiatsu. You should have called the place that sent her, explained you didn't know it was an escort service, and told them unless they gave young lady orders to leave immediately, you would have her escorted out by hotel security and/or the police. Then you should have reported the incident to the hotel management, especially if they're the ones suggesting the establishment. You could have said that on no list of gifts for significant anniversaries does "prostitute" appear.
As for your trauma—I can understand you were shaken, but look at it another way. When you tell your friends the story of this memorable anniversary, they will be shaking with laughter.