...CONTINUED
if you haven't read page 1 of our
Halloween Candies yet, click here!
Lightning
Pumpkins!
I'm sure you
remember me covering the "Lightning
Santas" for Christmas last year, but they're back in Halloween
form this time around and the tong is supposedly "new and improved". Yeah,
well let's not jump to conclusions there so quickly, bucko. The idea
behind these candies is that when you pick them up, they'll light up
thanks to a little LED light built into the tong.
Sure enough,
they deliver on their promise, because those pumpkins light up like flamin'
jack-o-lanterns on All Hallows' Eve alright! But are the tongs really "new
and improved" as they say? Well from what I can tell, the light is just as
powerful as ever but the real problem is that the tongs are now much
shorter than they used to be. As a result, you have to actually crush the
candy in the tongs before a connection is made so that they can light up.
With the longer tongs from last year, you didn't have to crush the candies
at all to get 'em to light up. It's not a big deal in the grand scheme of
things since they still look cool and taste great, but improved tongs? I
think not.
out of 5 jack-o-lanterns
Gummi Ghouls!
Here's
another Halloweeny score from the local dollar store. Gummi Ghouls come in
a variety of shapes, with the skull & crossbones being my favorite because
they gave him a pirate hat. What's nice about them is that each piece is
separate so you can put 'em back together like puzzle pieces if you so
desire. And trust me, you will desire, because you don't want to eat these
things. If these are "made with real fruit juice" as the package claims,
then all praise the Great Pumpkin for artificial flavors, because these
"real" flavors taste like plastic. Maybe they meant that these candies
were made with the real fruit juice from those real fake
decorative plastic fruits that people keep in bowls for some reason? We
may never know.... and you know what? I'm ok with that.
out of 5 Audrey II's
Graveyard
Goodies Party Pack!
You've
probably never heard of the "Graveyard Goodies" brand before. Don't feel
bad, neither did I until recently, and it's probably because they're about
as generic as you can get. Still, for a generic brand o' Halloween
candies, they definitely put forth a decent effort on the packaging of
their candies. While the cut-out on the front of the box could've been a
better, spookier shape instead of the drunken Tetris block shape that they
went with, the individual boxes are pretty nice. They could've just put
them in typical boxes, but they took the time to add little paper tab
extensions to the boxes just so you could see more of the design. I
particularly appreciated the extra tab for the skull box which enabled you
to see its smiling jaw. Sure, all of the artwork looks like it came from
one of those lame clip-art sites, but at least they tried.
The candies
aren't anything new. In fact, the pumpkins are exactly the same shape as
the ones that came in the Pumpkin Decoder featured on page 1 of this article, but
I'm happy to report they don't taste the same. Instead, these taste
exactly like candy necklaces... only difference is you're not left with
that sad, soggy piece of string when you're done eating the candies this
time.
out of 5 leaf piles
Tongue
Tattoo Scream Pops!
I'm pretty
sure everybody has seen lollipops like these before. You lick 'em and a
second later, the cool faces on the pops are hideously deformed, as if
somebody doused them with sulfuric acid. Well there's something you may
not know about them, and that's that if you're careful, you can
temporarily tattoo your tongue with any one of these five faces. Behold!
That's
right, if you press down on your tongue carefully, you can leave a pretty
decent imprint right on your tongue. Ok, so the Jason one didn't really
come out too well, but I suspect that's because my hands were already
shaking from my Halloween candy sugar-rush and not because the pops were
designed poorly. Oh and in case you were wondering, the "gruesome grape"
flavor is pretty damned good too. Definitely worth picking up a bag of
these even if it's just for the tongue-staining novelty.
out of 5
tombstones
Box Of
Boogers!
I know I
reviewed these last year, but they deserve to be reviewed again because
the candy geniuses at Flix have made a big improvement to their Box Of
Boogers this year. And what is the improvement exactly? It's quite simple:
now they actually look like big juicy boogers! I couldn't pick a
finer specimen from my own nose if I tried, and I guarantee it wouldn't
taste nearly as good as these do. Just
look at the ones from last year and you'll instantly see the
difference. Much to Flix's chagrin, the boogers from last year came out
looking like little puffed marshmallow blobs, but this year they came out
as originally intended while still keeping a great tangy Snottermelon,
Sour Green Boogy and Lemon Loogy flavors that aren't too overwhelming like
some sour candies tend to be. Listen to Chef Ghoulicious and eat your
boogers kids! They'll make you grow strong and healthy!
out of 5 zombie hands
Scooby-Doo
Lollipops!
Anybody who
grew up watching Scooby-Doo can certainly appreciate these lollipops.
Scooby himself, the Scooby-Doo logo tag and a fingerprint clue round out
the shape selection. As usual, I went straight for the blue one, but it
was unfortunately a much weaker blue raspberry flavor than you'd expect.
Still, now that I just ate a fingerprint, I can now finally scratch off "eating
crime scene evidence" off my list of things to in my life. While the
fingerprint didn't leave much of an impression, the wild cherry and sour
apple flavors were definitely keepers that I'd take over a Scooby snack
any day.
out of 5 Edgar
Allen Poe's.
Candy
Corn Flavored Hershey's Kisses!
It still
amazes me to this day that there is such an overwhelming divide amongst
people when it comes to candy corn. Out of all the sweets out there, candy
corn probably creates the most prominent dichotomy... people either love 'em
to death or they want to see them removed from the face of the earth
forever. There simply is no in between. Well, for those of you who like
candy corn, you're in luck this year, because Hershey's has released a
limited edition "Candy Corn" flavor for their kisses. When I first saw
them, I couldn't imagine that they'd taste very good, but honestly, I've
grown to like 'em! It's basically white chocolate with just a hint of
candy corn flavoring, but the candy corn flavoring is nothing so strong
that it overpowers the general white chocolate taste. We generally only
get to enjoy candy corn once every year, so why not enjoy it with some
more variety. Still no sign of the
candy corn taffy from last year yet, but this is definitely a fine
substitute to hold me over until I do.
out of 5 Counts (ah-ah-ah!)
Mummified
Fingers Candy Suckers!
Found these
things shoved behind some other candies at target and didn't know what to
expect. Considering how the quality of most of the stuff they carry is top
notch, these Mummified Fingers really seem to be just slapped together.
Not much flavor to 'em at all really, but at least the multi-colored nail
polish doesn't come off as soon as you start eating the fingers. And
speaking of the nail polish, I honestly never knew mummies were so
stylish. Maybe they're buried with it, maybe it's Maybelline?
out of 5 Audrey II's
