Rewrite the Ten Commandments Contest!

THE OTHER ENTRIES PAGE 3:
Warning:
Some of these REALLY sucked. That's why they didn't win.


Name:........... Kirsten
E-Mail:......... gutter_angel@gurlmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Thou shalt kill Eminem. (anywhere, any time. It don't matta!).
2. Thou shalt not covet Barbies.
3. Thou shalt not take Krazy Kat's name in vain.
4. Thou shalt not take anything George "Dubya" says seriously.
5. Thou shalt not steal. (unless it's something you really want and it is 
ridiculessly priced).
6. Thou shalt not lie, unless the creampuff int the sky says so.
7. Thou shalt not mention Micheal Jackson. Ever. I'm not kidding.
8. Thou shalt not eat that marshmellow-fluff-crap.
9. Thou shalt not say "shalt not".
10. Thou shalt not live by useless crap that someone writes up and sells to you promising salvation. Obviously.
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Name:........... Joel "The Demon" Mahler
E-Mail:......... pig_fukker@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Aint no muthafuckas get my shit all whacked ouuta line!
2. Aint no muthafuckas be fucking all my women!
3. Any muthafucka step outta line, gonna get whacked!
4. Any muthafucka found felching, gonna get whacked!
5. Any person displaying cruelty to animals, or children, or "retards" shall 
indeed be punished by lightning up the ass!
6. Drug usage is encouraged, as long as you don't over do it.
7. Any person that goes against the social norm, shall not be belittled, made fun of, or degraded for displaying individuality.
8. Any person who blindly follows all of these rules, will suffer the same fate as #5 (ie. lightning up the ass).
9. Any person found purposely disobeying my rules, will be left alone, cause its my job to shove lightning up their ass! Not yours!
10. Sex is no longer taboo! Orgasms are no longer taboo! And any political figure found attempting to dampen, or hinder any sort of granted freedom, will have lightning shoved up their ass, and inside their pee-hole.

Thanks, and have a nice day!
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Name:........... Toby Wong
E-Mail:......... toby@sneakmedia.com , sublogic_k@hotmail.com

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1:Thou shalt not annoy
2:Thou shalt not piss the lord off
3:Thou shalt not fuck sheep
4:Thou shalt not name thou's children bubba, dary-ann, or gaylord
5:Thou shalt not grovel...Stop groveling...I HATE WHEN PEOPLE GROVEL!!!
6:Thou shalt not constantly quote monty python
7:Thou shalt not refer to me as "GOD" or "THE LORD" but as "XQUOBTHOSES, EATER OF WORLDS!!!!"
8:Thou shalt not mispronounce "XQUOBTHOSES"...EVER!
9:Thou shalt get me a beer
10:Don't make me come down there.
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Name:........... Lord Toast
E-Mail:......... Squirrelwhosmad@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. BOW TO THOSE WHO WHERE THE PICKLE HAT
2. THOU SHALT NOT LICK COWS ON THE BUTTOCKS
3. THOU SHALT NOT BOW TO THOSE WHO WHERE A COW HAT
4. THOU SHALT NOT TOUCH SQUIRREL
5. THOU SHALT NOT TOUCH YOUR COACH AS A MONKEY TOUCHES A CAT WITH STRIPES
6. THOU SHALT NOT SUPPORT MEGATRON
7. THOU SHALT NOT WORSHIP CATS WHO ARE CATS AND NOT DOGS IN DISGUISE PRETENDIN TO BE SPACE CAT FROM JUPITER WHO EAT KIBBLE
8. YOU SHALL FEAST BY EATING CATS, STEAK ,HOURSE RADISH, HAIR, OLD BG'S ALBUMS, ELEPHANT TUSK, CATS PRETENDING TO BE CHINESE IMMIGRANTS, AND COWS WITH TONGUE RINGS FOR EVERYDAY OF THE YEAR.
9. THOU SHALL JUMP OUT OF TREES SCREAMING MOO FOR EVERYDAY OF THE FIRST 12 MONTHS.
10. THOU SHALL TELL YOUR BOSS OR TEACHER THAT WORK IS AGAINST YOUR RELIGION AND THAT IF YOU ARE FIRED OR FAILED IT IS RELIGOUS DSCRIMINATION.

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Name:........... George
E-Mail:......... geodjngl@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. hate everyone regardless of race, color, or creed. (no one likes you anyway)
2. never ever piss on an electric fence.
3. fuck first, friends later
4. sex with your mom is ok if she is really hot.
5. send me your money, all of it, i will give you back what i dont need.
6. do not thank me for the insignifigant abilities that make you rich (this means you britney spears, you are a no talent whore)
7. being gay is ok.(just dont try to slip me the old one eye)
8. lie as much as possible, it makes people feel better.
9. it is ok to love your pets, but not to loooove your pets.
10. give George the fucking nun action figure or i will stab you in the eye with a soldering iron.
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Name:........... BUD
E-Mail:......... desolation_angel51499@yahoo.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. thou shalt not kill, unless you're going to eat it, or call all of your 
friends to come look at it and poke it with wiffle bats.
2.thou shalt not lie, unless you really mean it
3.thou shalt not covet thou neighbors wife, or any other slut who is married but will fuck you anyways
4.thou shalt not use the words "thou" or "shalt"
5.you shouldn't whip your childrens bare genitals with a car antenna, unless you are a pro-lifer/goth/whiny non-smoker/rave-kid/hypo-christian,...
if so, go ahead and beat those fucksticks till they're sterile!
6.you should wear horribly annoying extremist t-shirts with slogans like "jews killed christ","dogs fucked the pope, no fault of mine","god loves me more","of all the false prophets,christ definitely had the best abs" etc. to a baptist church once a week.
7.if you feel you are a member of any group mentioned in the fifth commandment, you shall kill yourself.....now..........seriously...right now
8.you shall not worship anything other the truth
9.you shall not go to any hyper-religious, money-hungry, group leader to find the truth
10. you shall not try to live your life according to what someone else chiseled into some rocks or typed on a computer, use your own judgement, it's okay, i trust ya.
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Name:........... KingKillo
E-Mail:......... XxKingKillo@aol.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. thou shalt like cheese alot
2. thou shalt not ejaculate in thine own sock's.
3. thou shalt not write hot check's to score thou a fat sack.
4. thou shalt cook pork properly.
5. thou shalt clean the bong and/or hooka on a regular basis.
6. thou shalt NOT like van halen.
7. thou shalt not be a little bitch.
8. thou shalt put a bag clip on the chips when thou are done eating them.
9. thou shalt run all mini vans off the road.
10. thou shalt rejoice in the glory of tator tots.(that was so lame)
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Name:........... Bryan Cash
E-Mail:......... seleniat@rice.edu

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My New 10 Commandments:

1. Thou shalt not turn thine headphones up so high that all can hear.

2. Thou shalt refrain from going to http://www.goatse.cx , though the temptation be great.

3. Thou shalt ensure Jerry Faldwell be sodomized by either Tinky-Winky or Bin Laden.

4. Thou shalt recognize that the Pope, Castro, Rod Stewart, and Bea Arthur are all old men.

5. Thou shalt quit thy bitching, I'm trying to get some peace up here.

6. Thou shalt realize you're not the most important things around. You know the dolphins? I like them better.

7. You should realize that all this middle-english quoting of "thou" and "shalt" is annoying and pretentious, so stop quoting me like I say it.

8. You should strive for perfection, and barring that inebriation.

9. You should know the Devil does NOT make you do things. You do, so quit trying to get avoid responsibility.

10. You should really get to know the Whore of Babylon, she's not that bad. Great personality.

11. You should realize limits are for you all. If I want there to be eleven commandments there are. Moses just wanted something neat to fit on two tablets.
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Name:........... stu leedham
E-Mail:......... spook_800@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Thou shall all have a copy of fireman sam's videos, HE IS FUCKIN COOL!

2. Thou shall not ever strut down a shark like a duck.

3. If thou hasn't obayed these commandments thou shall give up your name and be known as wassak of the clangers.

4. Thou shall all have a goldfish called fluffy as a shrine to the guardian of neo land.

5. Thou shall all have a stuffed bunny rabbit to stick pins in him, he is satan of the new under world, boo.

6. Thou shall get a good lawyer to plead for your sanity if you go by these commandments.

7. Thou shall not do something is hard to do, then don't bother doing it.

8. Thou shall all once a day sing "praise the holy fluffy" three times while having a piss.

9. Thou shall all kill hearsay for tormenting everyones sanity and ears.

10. Thou shall go to fluff land if you follow these commandments, "PRAISE THE FLUFF".

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Name:........... Paul
E-Mail:......... Mackyisback@aol.com 

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The Ten Commandments of CYBER Dating

1---thou shalt purchase and install the real and greatest god of all time 
known as "the puter", and thou shalt gain the power of the kingdom of 
"smoke and mirrors, and become anyone thy wanteth to, so far as it serves thee.

2---thou shalt not worry thyself with the use of caps. if thine anile 
reader is disturbed by "punctuation correctness", fucketh her, and the 
swayback steed she rideth in on.

3---thou shalt acquire a compatible photograph of a stud-muffin model and attacheth a pic of thine own head to the models' body, causing thy lucky lady-on-profile to pee-eth in her panty with delight.

4---thou shalt not pee-eth in thy panty and casteth it onto the ground, 
for it maketh really funky mud.

5---thou shalt tell incredible lies to thine online concubine. it is wise 
to liken thyself unto bill gates financially, and the great god of 
fucking, eros himself, with regard to thine stamina in thine most popular 
and well-worn, mattress of love.

6---thou shalt, again, be free to lie thy ass off, if thy rendevous with 
an online maiden revealeth a woman who looketh nothing at all like her 
online pic. thou art free to tell the deceiving bitch, thou art gay and 
with aides.

7---thou shalt not fear thine boldness in telling each ho to taketh a 
number and getteth in line.

8---thou art ok, if married and secretly contactingeth desperate females 

9---thou shouldst not worry if thy wife shouldst uncover thy secret emails. for what is the worst that could happen to thee? she might divorceth thee? then thou wouldst be free to bringeth each and every horny winch to thy dwelling and have thy way. geteth real.

10a---there shall not be any url addresses before I-Mockery.com.

10b---thou shalt cast out commandment 10a, if thou does not reign 
victorious in the url contest.
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Name:........... Joe -the person who tried to register 4 times, but it WOULD NOT work. Fuckers.
E-Mail:......... CPsMagnumXL200@aol.com

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My New 10 Commandments:

1- Thou shall not kill, and neglect to videotape it.

2- Thou shall not listen to country music, or Creed.

3- Thou shall not worship false idols, such as shitty pop stars.

4- If you are going to be a goth, you shall dress like an asshole, so when Satan and I split up the next shipment of souls, Satan will be able to locate his minions by saying "I get all the retards wearing black duct tape and napkins, and you can have the rest." It makes it a lot easier for me.

4- Thou shall not watch Jenny Jones.

5- Worship the holy I-Mockery by visiting every day.

6- Don't elect retards.

7- NEVER, under ANY CONDITIONS, cancel The Ninja Turtles, Transformers, or The Simpsons.

8- Lighten the fuck up.

9- Thou shall not take designer drugs, listen to shitty music, dress like a 
fool, and go to big parties to rape cracked-out women.

10- Don't be an unregistered bastard.

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Name:........... anonymous
E-Mail:......... anonymous

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My New 10 Commandments:
(1) Thou shalt be faithful to the church of I-Mockery.
(2) Thou shalt not write "I love you guys!" on your shirt with poop. Ever.
(3) Thou shalt not fraternize with ravers.
(4) Thou must consume Boo Berry cereal at every meal.
(5) Thou shalt not ever refer to Mr. Mockery as GOTH.
(6) Thou must adhere the laws of all Chick Tracts as redone by any I-Mockery follower.
(7) Thou shalt not ever, EVER read the bible.
(8) Thou shalt not own "She's All That".
(9) Thou must BUY FROM THE I-MOCKERY STORE! (Hey look! It's Jesus in a Cynical Bastard T-Shirt!)
(10) Thou shalt not expect a "Free Football Phone!" for following said commandments.
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Name:........... john william northam
E-Mail:......... northam@sonet.net

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My New 10 Commandments:
1.thou shalt worship who ever you wont all religions were made up i really could care less about them.
2.thou can fuck whoever you want the way i see it your strait i get a child if your gay that makes room for someone else. 
3. as long as it harms no one do what ever you want too.
4. peace love and no war.
5. use your bible for tabbaco paper its been edited deleted and re written its crap.
6. if you force your religion on other people ill force you to babble meaning less words and twitch and if you dont beleave ill do it go to a pentacostal church see my wrath.
7. quit paying tithes and pay your savings account and you shall be blessed.
8. don't listen to a preacher if i have something to say to you i will.
9. make your own religion its fun hell everyone else has done it.
10. know your self and listen to yourself. hell fuck yourself.
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Name:........... Jerry Pasadena
E-Mail:......... landminespring@webtv.net

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My New 10 Commandments:
10. Thou shall not complain about prices at a 99-cent store.

9. Thou shall surf the internet if thou hast past high school or have a GED.

8. Thou shall not be able to wear cross colors for it is the clothes of the devil.

7. Thou shall play Bad Religion music on sundays.

6. Thou shall not have a flobee.

5. (sorry...went to lunch).

4. Thou must own copies of he-man episodes so it can live on.

3. Thou must never speak of Rosie O'Donnell's name unless it's a negative tongue about her.

2. Thou must write letters to general mills to bring back the miracle that is boo berry cereal.

1. Thou must never be a republican.
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Name:........... Longinus Biro
E-Mail:......... longinus_biro@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1.Thou shalt disembowel any being, ox or deceased entity that defies the will of The church of mockery.

2.Thou shalt not pay any attention in school, since standardized education has no place in the world.

3.Thou shalt smoke the burning bush everyday, thou shalt not worship any false shrines, such as the nefarious Britney Spears, thou shalt not succumb to her prodigious artificial bosoms.

4.Remember the day Aaliyah demised, keep it sacrilegious: Drink ale, get wasted, and cause chaos.

5.If thy father or thy mother deny you the right of the internet, thou shalt crush thy skulls in with a heavy blunt object.

6.Thou shalt be a: Rapist, thief, murderer, paedophile, necrophiliac, drug 
addict, drug dealer, gang member, shrine desecrator and thou shalt kill any small fluffy animal that gets in thy way.

7.Thou shalt attempt to be the biggest pimp ye can be.

8.Thou shalt go on a horrific killing-spree at least once a month, and thou shalt not masturbate over bestiality, only regular pornography.

9.Thou shalt burn down thy neighbours house, if thy neighbour smirk at ye.

10.Thou shalt pay tribute to the glory that is Longinus, if thy neighbour’s wife or maidservant have a nice ass, thou shalt take that booty in you’re grip and pump it dry.

THIS IS THE WILL OF LONGINUS, ALL WHO OPPOSE I SHALL SUFFER UNSPEAKABLE PLAGUES.

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Name:........... Miles Crater
E-Mail:......... mcrater@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. If you have to have other god's, hide them in the closet when I come by so as not to offend Me.
2. If you absolutely have to make an idol then it has to be visible from at 
least a mile away, so that when I'm feeling bored I can wrathfully smite it. I like smiting.
3. I hear everything. How would you like it if I called your name every 5 
minutes? Though shalt not pester Me.
4. Thou shalt not work Weekends. If your boss tries to make you, then He shall taste My wrath. You get to do the actual dirty work. Be creative.
5. Your parent's have proven worthy of the gift of Life. How do I put this? You haven't. Piss your parent's off to much and you never will. Good luck.
6. Thou shalt not kill unless My back is turned. Bury the bodies deep.
7. Smiting people is fun. Don't give me a reason.
8. Thou shalt not get caught. Without a good excuse.
9. Lie. It doesn't matter. I know the Truth. If I care I'll just tell people 
what they need to know.
10. Do you have the ability to shoot lightning from your fingertips? Didn't 
think so. Don't piss Me off.
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Name:........... jay morgans
E-Mail:......... blueboywb@aol.com
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1. jay morgans shall win all contests that involve warrior nuns.

2. thou shalt drink much.

3. thou shalt not covet the cool shit jay morgans wins in all contests 
involving warrior nuns.

4. all altar boys not too traumatized from repeated molestation must always make funny faces while serving mass.

5. thou shalt accept all magic superpowers of the pope, whether he is wearing a cape and tights or not.

6. thou shalt bed women continuously, and brag on penis size. even it's all tiny and shit.

7. keep holy sunday, because that's when the simpsons are on.

8. thou shalt not call my god damn house on the sabbath, as i will be 
watching the simpsons.

9. the only execption to the 8th commandment is if you are calling to say 
"hi. you won a warrior nun thing."

10. keep sacred the first commandment.
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Name:........... Dan
E-Mail:......... dulhirest@yahoo.com
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1. Thou shalt not give Jesus Beano. (If he is the son of God let him do it his damn self.)
2. Fornication Rocks!
3. Thou shall kill only when particularly annoyed.
4. Don't worry about your father and mother. If you still talk to them both then you're one up on the rest of us.
5. Thou shall not get caught stealing.
6. Covet away. Who the hell cares?
7. Adultery Rocks!
8. Keep every second Thursday as the Sabbath. Wednesday is dollar beer night.
9. Take my name in vain all you want. You're all going to hell anyway.
10. Fear and respect Clowns. They are created in my image.
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Name:........... Sean Patterson
E-Mail:......... monkeylice@hotmail.com
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1) THOU SHALT NOT WATCH "REALITY TELEVISION"!
2) THOU SHALT NOT RAVE!
3) THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S PET!
4) THOU SHALT NOT VOTE REPUBLICAN!
5) THOU SHALT NOT "BOGART THAT DOOBIE"!
6) THOU SHALT NOT LISTEN TO THE BACKSTREET BOYS OR ANY OF THEIR DEMONIC KIND!
7) THOU SHALT NOT TALK ON THY CELL PHONE WHILST DRIVING!
8) THOU SHALT NOT DRIVE FOREIGN CARS!
9) THOU SHALT NOT SPANKETH THY MONKEY!
10) Seriously, don't beat off, especially not in church.Get more from the Web.
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Name:........... Mjcino
E-Mail:......... Mjcino@aol.com 
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1. No whining
2. Don't do anything stupid.
3. Don't rape anyone
4. Smoke pot at least once a month
5. Don't wake up before 9 o'clock AM
6. Worship the rubber chicken instead of the cross.
7. No more crosses.
8. The stocks WILL be put into use for petty offenses such as theft.
9. No more pop music.
10. Public areas will be clothing optional.
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Name:........... Rev. Joey Mustaine
E-Mail:......... joeymustaine@minorthreat.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
I. Thou shalt not in thine neighbor's wife's mouth defecate
II. Thou shalt not take holy Col. Sanders name in vain
III. Thou shalt not possess knowledge of thine own modem init string
IV. Thou shalt not pluralize "ninja" to "ninjas"
V. Thou shalt have no gods other than thine true god Ganon
VI. Thou shalt not fight pornographic pop-ups
VII. Thou shalt not "warm" the pool
VIII. Thou shalt not miss a day's work at thine Speak and Math
IX. Thou shalt not reject those whom attempt to ignite thine flatulance
X. Thou shalt thine bookmarks keep updated
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Name:........... Powers|ave
E-Mail:......... powerslave@shadowguardians.com

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My New 10 Commandments:

Thou shalt vote (of course God meant this one for the Castlevania mockery game on Newgrounds)

Thou shalt persecute unregistered bastards on the message forums.

Thou shalt not utter PLUR.

Thou shalt not be a little bitch.

Jesus as a savior? Hah! That bastard took all of the credit and what do I get? God do this, God I'm starving to death with 12 diseases... filthy whiners. God has better things to do than coddle your lazy, useless ass...go get a day job and leave me alone.

Thou shalt drink Guiness.

Worry not for thy brethren. Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day... Eat the man and he'll not have that problem anymore.

Thou shalt masturbate. At least in the presence of Emma. You know I do. (God speaking of course, but not omissive to the writer.)

Thou shalt be confused as hell and fucking like it, amen.

Thou shalt not miss an episode of Strangers With Candy... it just isn't right!

Fear not thy neighbor... stab them first and take their wallet for they won't need it where they're going.

(hope ya like a few of em at least... maybe I tried too hard for it being 
5:30am... I fucking NEED a nun though!!!!!!!!)
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Name:........... brit=zy
E-Mail:......... grim_reaper_chik@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. thou shalt not wear booty shorts with the pockets stickin out the bottem
2. thou shalt not talk in "l33t"
3. thou shalt not masturbate at a friends house
4. thou shalt not have cyber sex and say you are a hot chik with 36DD breasts
5. thou shalt not watch mr.bean
6. thou shalt not call anyone your "pimp daddy"
7. thou shalt not leave your calander on a past month
8. thou shalt not eat lint off the carpet
9. thou shalt not bark at the postman
10. thou shalt not ask anyone "is that your final answer"
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Name:........... Tropical
E-Mail:......... tropical@edrugtrader.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
Screw the ten commandments!!!!!!!
You're all goin' to hell no matter how hard you try
MWAAAAhahahahahahahahaha
-god
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Name:........... Justin
E-Mail:......... webmaster@pigvomit.org

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Thou shalt not eat upon the anus of Goatse
2. Thou shall comp-u-geek.net a new person every week
3. Thou shalt not deny UCB of immortality
4. Thou shalt not jacket more than 4 times a day
5. Thou shalt not claim another Yemenen than Habib
6. Thou shalt not conform to society
7. Thou shalt not laugh at Jay Leno's jokes
8. Thou shalt not exclude meat from any meal
9. Thou shalt not eat the Spaghetti Jesus
10. Thou shalt not eat any pickles other than Gedney or Cains
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Name:........... Vince "liquidstrifedotcom" V.
E-Mail:......... Vince@straightedge.zzn.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
Back again with 10 new juicy commandments!
1. Thou shall masturbate when prompted to
2. Thou shall eat McDonalds until thy arteries give in
3. Thou shall use shameless self promotion for thy websiteliquidstrifedotcom
4. Thou shall ERROR: WINDOWS RUNTIME .DLL FILE VXB DRIVER I-MOCK.DLL, THIS 
COMMANDMENT WILL NOW BE SHUT DOWN!~~:
5. Thou shall stalk girls who are 9 on the internet with thy AIM screen name
6. Thou shall make up songs that include the words "ass" and "bizatch" about our Lord and Savior, Jesus
7. Thou shall have sex whenever the oppurtunity presents itself
8. If by the age of 15, you have not yet kissed someone of the opposite sex, you shall be condemmed to a life of misery and pain on a stake in a dungeon
9. Thou shall not fall.....asleep...whi...le...writing.....1..0...command....ment.zzzzzzzzzz..
10. Thou shall act cool at all times by flaunting money around and wearing a jewish star
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Name:........... Brent
E-Mail:......... ditharam@hotmail.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Thou shout not be or act like Richard Gere
2. Thou shout not say the word "fuck"
3. Thou shout not miss the sacred game of football on the holy Sabbath
4. Thou Shout not offer thy neighbor a beer that is warm
5. Thou shout not have sexual relations with an intern unless you get something better then a BJ from a fat chick
6. Thou shout not wear a bikini unless you rank at least a 7 on the 1-10 chick scale
7. Thou shout not kill your parents and all your class mates in rage over years of locker room abuse, unless your a sports super star with lots of money then you can kill who ever you damn well please
8. Thou shout not prohibit man from drinking after 2am
9. Thou shout not criticize thy neighbor for his huge porn collection but 
instead should admire him and pray for one of your own.
10. Thou shout not be French
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Name:........... Mickey Mack
E-Mail:......... thordog@home.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Thou shalt not Lie or become a Marketer. Marketing and Advertising is the path of the unrighteous and the unrighteous burn in Hell
2. Thou shalt not own an SUV. unless it is essential to your livelihood....in which case you are a redneck. and rednecks burn in hell
3. Beef. Its there for a reason. and that reason is not to Fart and eat grass. It is to grow fat and be eaten by my people. Same with Chicken and Pork.but pork is best when "smoked" as in bacon
4. Thou shalt Honor ME "michael" the Lord your god, by sending money to the following address: 1313 Mockingbrid lane..... And thou shalt have
a raucous party once a year to honor me.
5. Thou shalt not criticize me even when I try to fit 2 commandments into one.
6. Thou shalt learn to appreciate good music. None of this Korn Bizcut shit. GreenDay, Blink182 all of the shit you hear on the radio....sucks and is the devils music. God looks favorably upon Metalheadz
7. Thou shalt not tolerate morons. religious fanatics, extremists, your boss and Bushes are all examples.
8. Thou shall support your local (video and book) stores. cockbuster is the devils den. Buy local (& fresh) and get some of those 18 wheelers off our roads
9. Thou shall Fight the Power! but not in a "Flava-Flav" sort of way.
10.Thou shalt not look upon warrior nun with lustful eyes

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Name:........... Vince "liquidstrifedotcom" V.
E-Mail:......... Vince@straightedge.zzn.com

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My New 10 Commandments:
1. Thou shalt go to I-mockery.com twice a day to generate hits
2. Thou shall itch thy nutsack when asked by your second cousin's aunt
3. Thou shalt not go against god unless you win something, then it is ok
4. Thou shall steal money from thy parents 8 times a week for whoring cash
5. Thou shall eat water ice in the summer to satisfy a hungry appitite and in the winter, thou shall eat chef boyardee cream of ass
6. Thou shall not use Microsoft Paint as thy primary graphics software
7. Thou shall consome caffiene every 48 minutes of the day in the form of Coffee or Mountain Dew
8. Thou shall try to remember the...what was it...4 or 6 past commandamenthingies? Oh well, you get the point.
9. Thou shall use thou to begin every sentence
10. Thou shall eat food to the point of mass dihherea

with love, Vince from liquidstrife.com
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