Features

M.U.S.C.L.E. Revisited!
by: -RoG-

M.U.S.C.L.E. - Millions of Unusual Small Creatures Lurking Everywhere.
Figures: [1-25] [26-50] [51-75] [76-100] [101-125]
[126-150] [151-175] [176-200] [201-233]
[Mr. Blocky Tribute]

Figures 176 - 200

Name: Nigel
Number: 176
Description: Wow, I never knew that Nigel, from the band "Spinal Tap", was into wrestling. But I guess since the band's career starting going downhill, he probably had to find another line of work.
Name: Klondular the Barnacle Muncher
Number: 177
Description: Klondular is a strange sea creature with amazing strength. Only problem is, he won't fight voluntarily. His trainers discovered that the one thing that motivates him is barnacles. As nasty as it may be, he loves to eat the things. So, his trainers tell him that if he beats his opponents in the ring, they'll give him an entire bag FILLED with barnacles to eat! Well, it's worked so far...
Name: Spitty McNibble
Number: 178
Description: Spitty is one weird mofo. He waits for it to rain and gathers all the water in his collar. Then, he slurps up the water and spits it out at his opponents. And in doing so, Spitty often receives beatings that would make a Columbian Death Squad wince.
Name: Adam Antlerhead
Number: 179
Description: Talk about shit luck. Adam was born with antlers. Nobody knows how or why, but it's assumed that one of his parents was a human and the other was... well, you know. I won't go into the details of that horrific scenario. Anyway, Adam lives in the backwoods out in the middle of nowhere. Whenever he goes outside a hunter sees him and takes a shot, mistaking him for a deer. Hey you know, come to think of it, I haven't seen Adam around here in a long time. Maybe someone got him and his head is now a trophy hanging above a mantle. Poor Adam... he will be missed.
Name: Elf boy
Number: 180
Description: Actually, he might not even be an elf. He could be an alien punk rocker from hell for all I know. The point is, just because somebody plopped a strange looking head on a generic M.U.S.C.L.E. body, doesn't mean it's gonna instantly be an exciting new figure.
Name: Cheep Häk
Number: 181
Description: Slightly different, but still an obvious MuscleMan (#1) wannabe. I'm starting to think that Mattel hired one guy to make all of these generic figures. The creative department hated that guy too, because while they slaved away to come up with some great characters, all this guy had to do was make a bunch of generic figures from pre-existing molds. I bet he even had a higher salary...
Name: Socky
Number: 182
Description: Much like "Hanz & Franz" from Saturday Night Live, Socky tries to give the impression that he is a huge muscular guy. Sorry Socky, with a name like "Socky" it's pretty obvious that you stuff your clothes with socks to give the illusion of having muscles. Oh well, at least the socks have proved to be good padding when he's getting pummeled into the ground by his opponents.
Name: Hip Clip
Number: 183
Description: Hip Clip is a freak of nature. He was born with a head and hands that would normally be used to hang up clothes on a clothesline. But instead, he's turned them into savage weapons. Now he closes them on his enemies as they writhe in pain. Steer clear of Hip Clip, he's quite the evil fighter.
Name: Stunto
Number: 184
Description: Some M.U.S.C.L.E. fighters are too cowardly to film their own stunts. So they have a stunt-double stand in for them instead. That's where Stunto comes in. He fears nothing! He'll jump into a flaming piranha pit without hesitation. Problem is, his stunts always end up sending him to the hospital for a few months. Still his bravery is admirable (I think) and thus deserves recognition.
Name: Bottle Boy
Number: 185
Description: I'm not really sure what advantage having a body that's shaped like a bottle can provide. Nonetheless, Bottle Boy's brutish strength has won him many a battle, and rumor has it he's filled with perfume. So once he's done sweating it out with another M.U.S.C.L.E. fighter, he sprays 'em with perfume so their mangled corpse doesn't start to stink up the place. How thoughtful of him!
Name: Horde Trooper
Number: 186
Description: Whoah! It's a Horde Trooper from He-Man and the Masters of the Universe cartoon/toy series! Did he get lost and wander into the world of M.U.S.C.L.E.? Did Skeletor shrink him down and make him pink for fumbling up an attack on Castle Grayskull? Did Mattel just throw him in here to subliminally promote yet another one of their toy lines? We may never know the answer...
Name: Mr. Hawk
Number: 187
Description: Here's a happy guy! Look everybody, it's Mr. Hawk! He's about as nice as they come. In fact, he's never even fought in a single M.U.S.C.L.E. match. He's too busy having fun flying all over the place. If you're nice to him, he'll even give you a ride for free!
Name: MuscleMan
Number: 188
Description: Blah, blah, blah... haven't we had enough variations of MuscleMan (#1) yet? Seriously, this has gotten way out of hand. Even he looks kind of pissed that they made yet another copy of him.
Name: Baby Spiff - "Triumphant Return" version
Number: 189
Description: Yes! I never thought I'd see this lil' guy again, but Baby Spiff (#60) has come back once again to fight for truth, justice, and the Baby Spiffy way! We're all rooting for you Baby Spiff! You go!
Name: Cyborg Swordsman
Number: 190
Description: He's a cyborg and he's got a sword. If that's not enough to make you cower under your sheets, then perhaps his history of mercilessly chopping newborn babies in half and then eating them will.
Name: Hornok
Number: 191
Description: Wow Hornok... you've got horns on your head. Is that supposed to scare us? You don't look evil. You don't look powerful. You just look like a fool that's seen one too many cheap horror flicks.
Name: Jo-Jo Jagswillian
Number: 192
Description: This guy is a riot. He doesn't have any big physical features, but he can talk up a storm! He's like Stan the salesman from Monkey Island. He loves talking. His talking has been known to delay a match for over a week. Oh well, as long as it makes you happy, whatever floats your boat Jo-Jo.
Name: Slithery Serpent
Number: 193
Description: He's not the best of fighters... hell, he can barely keep his balance on that one tail of his when he's not being punched in the face. Still, don't let this fella catch you off guard. If he does, he'll wrap around you with his patented "death hug" and then it's all over for you pal. Yes siree, he's a tricky one that Slithery Serpent...
Name: Statue Man
Number: 194
Description: Come on everybody, let's all sing the Statue Man song together! "Statue Man! He stands absolutely still like a statue can! Because he's Statue Man! He doesn't like to eat your Raisin Bran. Because he's not a hungry hippo, he's the Statue Man!".
Name: Mr. Blocky - Spinning Top Version
Number: 195
Description: Oh... My... God! Mr. Blocky has morphed once again into what is probably his most funtastic form yet: A SPINNING TOP! Not only does he have that great "Mr. Blocky Smile" that we've all grown to love and adore over the years, but now he comes packed with extra fun! Just grab his happy blocky head, give it a quick twirl and away he goes... spinning with all the blocky glee in the world! Wow Mr. Blocky, you have truly outdone yourself this time. We salute you!
Name: Serious Simon
Number: 196
Description: Simon is not only a generic M.U.S.C.L.E. figure, but he is also very serious. Just try to make him laugh. Tell him the best joke and he won't even crack a smile. Tickle his feet... not even a giggle. How can he seemingly have no emotion whatsoever? Well the truth of the matter is............. he's been dead for 15 years! *gasp*
Name: Super Guy
Number: 197
Description: Super Guy seems to think that people actually give a damn about him, so he's always posing so people can take photographs of him... even if there's not a camera in sight. Have you no dignity Super Guy?
Name: MuscleMan - Vest Version
Number: 198
Description: Listen MuscleMan, just because you put on a friggin' VEST doesn't mean you get to have yet another figure of yourself made. Oh wait, I guess it does. I don't know why I'm complaining to you, I should be out hunting for the guy that decided he wanted to make a million different versions of you. Bah, go play with your vest.
Name: Baby Moro
Number: 199
Description: Awwww! Coootchie coootchie coo! Look at the lil' fella. It's Moro (#27) when he was a just a 6-armed baby freak! What a cute little guy. He could drink a bottle while changing his diapers at the same time. That's one hell of a talented baby!
Name: Lippy Bighands - Pre-Lip Removal Version
Number: 200
Description: I never thought I'd get to see Lippy Bighands (#29) before he had his lips removed. Maybe now that he has them, we can find out what exactly happened to them. He definitely looks a little smaller than back on figure #29, so maybe his lips were grafted onto several areas of his body afterall?

There's much more M.U.S.C.L.E. madness to see!
[Click to see Figures 201 - 233]

 

Reader Comments

Old Comments

Pickled Patriarch
Apr 18th, 2010, 09:43 PM
Since I still get a lot of email about this old M.U.S.C.L.E. toys tribute article from many years ago, I went ahead and put it into the new site template so you guys can finally comment on it here in public!
lurking on the walls
Apr 18th, 2010, 09:54 PM
I remembered that article RoG, freaking classic, it brought back memories of that old NES game. and the Game Cube Remake based off the FOX cartoon
taco loving zombie
Apr 18th, 2010, 11:03 PM
i used to own some of this but it was during my chewing period and they are all chewed up by now right now i have some of the new series that are colored
Sloth, PhD
Apr 19th, 2010, 02:28 AM
I remember finding a ton of these stuck in the ground at a playground. Must've been 20 or 30 of them that had been left there, then got stuck in the mud after a rain. I spent a good two hours carefully excavating them (I cite this as my first foray and initial interest in archaeology).
Forum Virgin
Apr 19th, 2010, 08:17 AM
After seeing the images I go "hey! I remember those, yo.", but for reasons unknown I remember them as "Geminis", must be some name copyright issue thing for the Netherlands then... oh well, now you know!
aint nobody
Apr 19th, 2010, 07:30 PM
Quote:
one of those disturbed kids that enjoyed torturing your figures by removing their limbs and setting them on fire
boy did I ever have a bad habit of doing that
Clap if you love Dynamo
Apr 19th, 2010, 08:22 PM
Things I wondered/noticed about when it came to M.U.S.C.L.E.

-The vollyball(#99) one fits perfectly into the hand(#153) one, and then you can make the hand one throw the vollyball one

-What's the deal with that hole in the chest of almost every Mr. Blocky? I always imagined it must be like his thermal exhaust port, and if anyone hit it with anything he would self destruct



-The rock guy (#23) fit snugly into the wrestling ring holder. So snugly in fact, that if put in carefully, he could not be defeated, if done carelessly however, you would be having to buy a new wrestling ring (I went through 3 after I discovered this fact)

What I learned from this article:

-Ass plants

-Some M.U.S.C.L.E. things have severe emotional issues.

-Seriously, ass plants
Im one good looking Troll
Nov 30th, 2010, 07:27 PM
Dude I like the series they ran seven year ago.Here is one of the villain,his name is Tyranno-Claw
Forum Virgin
Jan 15th, 2011, 10:17 PM
damn i agree with that
Clap if you love Dynamo
Jan 16th, 2011, 06:38 PM
I bet you are a spambot
Cranberry Everything
Jan 16th, 2011, 10:35 PM
damn i agree with that
Clap if you love Dynamo
Jan 17th, 2011, 06:18 AM
Forum Virgin
Jun 21st, 2014, 10:25 PM
PRICELESS - Genius post. I remember these!!! What about the other small little one piecers- that were dressed in army fatigues, and wore sunglasses... what were those called? Soldiers something?

Thanks, RoG. A++

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