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Shouldn’t you be blowing stuff up?

Why are you here on I-Mockery? Today is the day you can be outside blowing things up and it's perfectly legal! Set those fireworks and firecrackers on fire and let 'em burn your neighborhood down all in the name of "America". I'm pretty sure it's even legal to run around in the streets today with a bottle of tequila while shooting your pistolas in the air. I think it's also legal to murder someone with a pickaxe today, just as long as you sing the "star-spangled banner" while doing it. In fact, if I'm not mistaken, today you guys can even bring cocaine into the country as long as you explain to the border patrol that you thought, "the red, white and blue needed a little bit more 'white' so I thought I'd help out!"

Again, this deal is null and void come July 5th, so get crackin! VIVA LA CHAOS!

MEOW
The Underappreciated Artwork of Firecracker Labels

17 comments

Guest

AIF (Guest) on 07/04/2006 2:54 pm

Cocaine? Homicide? Arson?

I'm there. Viva la Chaos indeeed!



Guest

Bizarcane (Guest) on 07/04/2006 4:21 pm

Jiminy Criminy! Where's my chainsaw?



Guest

Nemurenai (Guest) on 07/04/2006 4:58 pm

Unless you live in a burn-ban area of Texas, in which case joy will cost you over two thousand dollars if you're caught. God bless America.



Guest

Jason Kane (Guest) on 07/04/2006 5:54 pm

hey ROG anyone doing fireworks by you? i'm guessing not...here in IL there pleanty of ppl doing them off...me being one of em.



Guest

El Guano (Guest) on 07/04/2006 6:44 pm

ME LIKEY BOOM BOOM!



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 07/04/2006 8:31 pm

Jason, yeah there's plenty of fireworks going off here! It's amazing! Oh wait, those are gunshots! I <3 Los Angeles.



Guest

Angryhydrlalisk (Guest) on 07/04/2006 10:43 pm

Fireworks here were nice. Except for two stipulations...

1. All firecrackers and bottle rockets are BANNED in KY because of a fine case of natural selection, so everyone has to get them in Indiana.

2. Kentucky also has Thunder over Louisville, which boosts this city's ego even more.



Guest

Ramon (Guest) on 07/05/2006 12:29 am

I'm here in LA and it sounds like a warzone outside! It looks real nice though. The people in my neighborhood got their hands on enough fireworks to do this for over 4 hours now. They're very dedicated down here.



Guest

Chris Gray (Guest) on 07/05/2006 4:54 am

Sadly, i'm english :(

PS. have less on them damned superman updates!



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 07/05/2006 10:00 am

Chris, being English is even better. You have no laws all year long. Well you do have some laws, but they're enforced by bobbies. And let's face it... bobbies aren't exactly fear-inducing figures of authority that make you want to be a do-gooder.



Guest

Vince (Guest) on 07/05/2006 10:40 am

Heh... I just went outside to see the spent explosive casings that me and my girlfriend lit off last night. We put a few sparklers togethen in a pentagon and lit them at the same time. Four of them blew the fifth one high enough to blacken the streetlight!!! Viva la Chaos indeed.



Guest

Bizarcane (Guest) on 07/05/2006 11:33 am

Sparklers blew up? Get your money back.



Guest

Angryhydrlalisk (Guest) on 07/05/2006 4:33 pm

Superboy is DEAD!



Guest

Zaihos (Guest) on 07/05/2006 7:12 pm

I'm from RI sono fireworks for me for me =( ....legally =P



Guest

El Guano (Guest) on 07/05/2006 7:41 pm

Bah!fireworks are illegal here in Pennsylvania i...think but they sell them...no matter,me blow stuff up anyway.



Guest

Diraru (Guest) on 07/06/2006 1:35 am

Yeah, that sucks about all the good fireworks being banned in KY, but thankfully indiana isn't very far off and we got an entire truckload! Theres still two huge paper bags of firecrackers+other assorted explosives and a box or two of bottle rockets.



Guest

AIF (Guest) on 07/07/2006 10:31 pm

Man, was the fourth sweet. Sat on a lookout tower with a group of friends and watched about twenty fireworks shows simultaneously all over San Bernardino... Good friggin' times.



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