"I got a rock." It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown taught us all that trick-or-treating can sometimes be a disappointing endeavor. Fortunately for you, I-Mockery's Halloween Club Packs have returned for the 2015 season, and they're so full of spooky goodness that they'd even make Charlie Brown himself smile through one of the many holes in his ghost sheet costume. Once again, I've scoured the globe in search of the finest random Halloween goodies to make these limited packs one of the most awesome things you'll ever find in your mailbox. And I gotta say, I honestly think I've topped myself this year! Behold!
I'm sure your eyes are crying tears of bloody joy at the mere sight of this spectacle, but I assure you this is just a mere sampling of what you can expect to find in one of our new Halloween Club Packs. So dry your eyes and let's take a closer look at some of the bigger things you'll receive in this year's pack. We begin with my personal favorite item: (more...)
I'm sure it comes as no surprise to any of you who've been with I-Mockery over the years, but I'm extremely excited about Halloween 2015. Yes, I go absolutely bonkers over it every year, but in recent times I've been so incredibly busy working on my upcoming video game projects, I've felt like quite the shut-in. Making my own original games is incredibly cool, don't get me wrong, but it's a very solitary line of work. Creating articles and videos for a web site can be solitary too, but it's usually a fairly quick turn-around time, and then I can enjoy talking with all of you about 'em. With games, however, I have to wait ages before I can release them and see how people react.
Ah, but when September 1st rolls around each year, it's like an ancient curse has been lifted, and I can emerge from my sarcophagus to seek out human flesh... or, you know... Halloween-themed cereals and candies to talk about. Whichever I happen to find first.
It's hard to believe how many years I've been doing this annual Halloween celebration for, but it's even more amazing to know that it's become such a major seasonal tradition for so many of you. I've always looked at it as an awesome privilege to share with you all the weird and wonderful things that accompany the spookiest of seasons each year, and I have a really good feeling about Halloween 2015. So a big thank you to all of you who've allowed me to be your petrifying pied piper, leading you into the spooky annual abyss that is Halloween on I-Mockery.
For those of you not in the know, September 1st marks the beginning of I-Mockery's annual "Two Months of Halloween" celebration. Every single update you see on this site from now until October 31st will be Halloween-related in one way or another. We've been extremely spoiled over the past several years with some insanely cool Halloween products hitting store shelves, and this season is shaping up to be one of the best yet again. Just on the horizon we have new Halloweeny cereals (and not just the Monster Cereals), new horror toys, new candies, new horror movies, and even Halloween falling on a Saturday! Yes indeed, the 2015 Halloween season is looking incredibly strong. And keep in mind, it's still very early in the season, so the best is yet to come. Trust me when I say the next two months are going to be insanely awesome. There is no greater time of the year.
(Wes Craven's cameo as Fred the janitor in Scream)
Before we move on to all the fun, it's with a heavy heart that I have to report what I'm sure most of you already know by now - Wes Craven has passed away. The man created some of the most amazing, fun, and unique horror films we've ever seen. Growing up with his films was a big reason why I've always loved the horror genre. Obviously, this is not the kind of news any of us wanted to hear when kicking off the 2015 Halloween season, but rather than drown in our sorrows, let's celebrate Craven's wonderful career. I can think of no better way to honor him than by watching many of his amazing horror films throughout the season. It's what Wes would've wanted. So bust out your old copies of A Nightmare on Elm Street, The People Under the Stairs, The Serpent and the Rainbow, Scream, Deadly Friend, and The Hills Have Eyes, and enjoy the works of one of horror's greatest visionaries.
Now onto some good news: Many of you have been asking, and I'm happy to announce that our classic Halloween Club Packs WILL be returning again this season! Last year, I more than doubled our supply and they still sold out, so I'm stocking as many as I can. That said, they're still in limited supplies, so when you see them go up for sale here on I-Mockery, place your orders quickly so you don't miss out. I already found some insanely cool new goodies for the packs that I think you're all gonna love! Remember, buying a pack really helps support this site in what is easily the most expensive time of the year for me. If you follow us on Twitter and Facebook, you'll know the instant the packs go up for sale. I don't have an official date / time set yet, but you can expect it to be towards the end of September. Just like last year, these packs will be available to people in the continental United States only. Sorry to our international readers, but the amount of time it takes me to fill out all those customs forms would be much better spent on writing more articles. That said, if you live elsewhere in the world and you really, really want a club pack, you can email me and I'll see if I can possibly set one aside from you.
Alright, let's get into the details of what you can expect to see on I-Mockery in the coming months. As you probably already know, we pride ourselves on going crazier over this holiday than just about any other place has in our 17+ year history, so we've got all sorts o' skull-splitting surprises planned for the 2015 Halloween season. We'll have coverage of various haunted Halloween attractions, horrific novelties, my huge annual round-up of the best & worst Halloween candies, horror movie reviews, new videos, craft projects, scary toy features, contests, and all the other wonderfully random oddities we stumble upon over the next two months.
If any of you have suggestions for Halloweeny things you'd like to see covered this season, or you have something you'd like to donate for us to review, please let me know here in the blog thread or shoot me an email. It doesn't matter if it's a Halloween event taking place in your area, a horror movie, an independent seasonal costume shop, some new candy, or some completely bizarro new Halloween novelty... I wanna see and hear all about it, so please get in touch!
To those of you who aren't well acquainted with our annual Halloween celebration here on I-Mockery, I always suggest checking out some of our main Halloween attractions. We have a huge archive of Halloween material on this site from previous years, so while you wait for our newest pieces to go up, I highly recommend checking out those older things to get in the spirit of the season.
-I-Mockery's Halloween Collection: Here you'll find quick 'n easy access to most of our Halloween material from the past. Extremely in-depth horror movie and candy reviews, product reviews, and of course the boppin' Halloween adventures of Count Pop himself along with other oddities. Of course, be sure to check back here on the homepage every day for the very latest Halloween updates as well.
-The Halloween Grab Bag: Much like our "Shorts" section, this is a place where you'll find our smaller Halloween articles, but often covering some of the weirdest stuff we've ever stumbled upon.
-The Greatest Horror Movie Moments: Another favorite is our ongoing quest to document some of the finest moments in horror movies. Sometimes they're moments you're well aware of, other times, it's stuff you probably never knew existed. Either way, if you're looking for some horror movies to check out this season, this is a great place to start.
-The Halloween Jack-O-Juke: Here be our Halloween music jukebox, filled with over 218 hand-picked horrifying songs and counting to keep your decaying ears bleeding with ghoulish glee all season long. Feel free to keep the Jack-O-Juke open in a separate window so you can listen to all of the hand-picked tunes while still checking out the latest article offerings here on I-Mockery. I've already added a handful of spooky new tunes this season, and hope to add some more during the next two months. If there's a song you think should be added to the jukebox, be sure to let me know by dropping a comment in this thread and I'll try to add it before the end of October!
-Trick-Or-Treat Adventure: One of the largest Flash games we ever made... and it's all about Halloween. If you're a fan of classic adventure games such as Secret of Monkey Island and Space Quest, you'll feel right at home with this one as you go on an adventure to build a Halloween costume and then collect enough candies before you battle the ultimate evil! It even auto-saves your progress as you go play, so you don't have to beat the game all in one sitting.
-Haunted House Candy Hunt: In this Halloween game, we pay tribute to the games of the Atari 2600 by creating an all new one in the same style. You must guide two buddies (who just so happen to be from a galaxy far, far away) through all the treacherous rooms of a spooky haunted house as they hold hands. Should you reach the end of the game, you'll have a showdown with the ultimate candy hoarder - The Grim Reaper himself! I've also heard from a reliable source (ie: myself) that there's a secret level select hidden somewhere in the game. But you don't need that anyway, right? Cheater!
-MonsterTime: With our most recent Halloween game, we pay tribute to another favorite arcade classic, BurgerTime. Only difference is, instead of building burgers, you're a mad scientist named Doc Mock who is building classic monsters to save you from the modern slasher monsters who are out for your blood!
-Doc Mock's Movie Mausoleum: Doc Mock, I-Mockery's official horror host is looking for a new home to shoot his original show at, but we have over 30 archived episodes you can still watch online. If you're looking for a good cheesy b-movie flick, check out all of the Doc's episodes that are archived on iTunes (some were archived on YouTube as well), including his Halloween specials! You can also find some of Doc Mock's special "Mini Mausoleum" videos here.
In addition to a ton of new feature articles, you can still expect our regular site updates to the Blog (don't forget the archived Halloween blog entries from years past). We've also got some great Halloween contests in store for you to participate in as well. Please show your support for all the hard work we put into our Halloween celebration by following I-Mockery us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to get all the latest updates.
HALLOWEEN SURVEY: Share in the comments section below what you're looking forward to most this Halloween season! Is there a horror movie you wanna see? A seasonal candy returning to store shelves? A haunted attraction you've been wanting to check out? Let's get this Halloweeny discussion going!
ONE FINAL NOTE: As a writer, the best compliment you can pay me is to chime in with your comments on any articles I post, and to share them with your friends on various social networks. I can't even begin to tell you just how much of my life gets swallowed up by Halloween for two months out of every year, and the workload is pretty tremendous; so it's the little things like your comments that which keep me motivated and going full-steam ahead on my DRAG-U-LA from now through October 31st. I-Mockery's big 2015 Halloween season has finally begun and I hope you'll join me on this spooky ride once again!
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