The Daily Blabber Blog

deal-or-no-deal-star-wars-style

Deal Or No Deal: Star Wars Style.

Who cried more tears and did more cocaine in the dressing room?

RoG recently told me that there was going to be a Star Wars oriented "Deal or No Deal" episode coming up, and it looked absolutely cheesy as shit, so I Tivoed it, and I watched parts of it on fast forward for a laugh, but I'll be damned if I'm actually going to waste two hours of my life watching a shitty game show.

Apparently though they had Darth Vader as the evil banker, R2-D2, Chewbacca and Carrie Fisher as moral support, and a bunch of stormtroopers and models in "Slave Leia" outfits holding briefcases with numbers representing dollar amounts (but no actual dollar amounts). Did anybody actually see this thing? It looked absolutely wretched. Unfortunately I saw a couple of the lame Star Wars jokes they made and it made me wish that lightsabers were real so I could cut my own head off. (more...)

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that-guy

“That guy”.

Can you spot the douchebag in this picture?

Have you ever heard someone talk about "that guy" who goes to a concert wearing the t-shirt of the band he's there to see perform? Every time I've heard mention made of "that guy", people have spoken of him as a clueless tool, some kind of embarrassing social pariah who clearly just doesn't "get" it. (more...)

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clown-travel-agency

Clown Travel Agency.

Don't forget to pack the Smilex gas!

On April Fool's Day I was sitting in my office praying for a swift death when suddenly my friend Matt called to tell me to check out the website www.clowntravelagency.com. The fact that it was April 1st was in the back of my mind, but Matt's not much of a prankster, so I decided to risk getting fired for pulling up some kind of Bozo fetish porn site and checked it out. Miraculously, it was one of five sites that actually isn't blocked by my company's annoying Websense blocker, and I quickly saw that it was some kind of viral marketing site for the upcoming Batman movie. After clicking on an envelope it pulled up a list of cities and said "the trip starts today" or something along those lines. (more...)

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badass-cute-cartoon-characters-um-no

Badass Cute Cartoon Characters? Um, No.

HULK SMASH BROS

So my roommate picked up Super Smash Bros. Brawl last week, and he and I have been kicking each others' asses for a good week now. Hell, we've even played the game some too, and it's a lot of fun, if you like those kind of games. But here's what I can't get over: Every time in the single player game that you get to a new character intro screen, they try to strike some kind of "badass" pose when it freezes on their still image and their name appears on the screen beneath them. (more...)

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my-life-as-a-zombie-sheriff

My Life As A Zombie Sheriff.

braaaaaiiiins

Here's your chance to help ol' Protoclown get on the upcoming Diary of the Dead DVD. Last Saturday I got all dressed up as a zombie and spent the entire day working on a three-minute short film directed by Robert Elkins, titled "No More Room in Hell." My friend Scott (the one who looks like Rob Zombie) told me about this shoot and convinced me to come along and be in Robert's film. I've already been in a previous film of his, "The Curse of Zombie Lake", which will appear on the upcoming Zombthology DVD, but I'm wearing a mask in that so no one will actually recognize me. Fortunately, we got actual make up this time around, which for me was a lot more fun. (more...)

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its-february-14th-a-very-special-day

It’s February 14th, A Very Special Day.

Love Locke Lost

That's right, there's a new episode of LOST on tonight! I seriously haven't been sucked into a show like this (with the exception of Dexter) in years. I know the show has its nay-sayers ("the show isn't going anywhere", "they're just making it up as they go", etc), but I absolutely must know how they're going to tie everything together at the end of this series. It's either going to be the most disappointing ending of all time, or it's going to prove beyond all doubt what an amazing writing team they have working on the show. Time will tell, but either way I'm hooked until the end. (more...)

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