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The Chicken Dance (for “Arrested Development” fans)

So at a recent party, we talked our friends Jason (Protoclown) and Macon into doing the chicken dance (one of the few dances that rivals the coveted "Carlton Dance"). Now for those of you not in the know, the chicken dance I'm speaking of comes from the show "Arrested Development" (you know, one of the many good shows the Fox network has been insane enough to want to cancel over the years). Anyway, the character "Gob" performs this dance any time he wants to mock somebody for being afraid of something. Gob is also a magician who always comes out on stage to the sounds of "The Final Countdown" by the band Europe. Quite the spectacle I assure you. Well, someone at the party happened to get some video footage (thanks Scott) of the two of them doing this chicken dance and I decided to combine it with that song. And now, I pass this footage onto you.

The Chicken Dance!
Click here to view the Chicken Dance footage!

Keep in mind the video is from a digital photo camera, so there wasn't much footage to work with at all. Also keep in mind that I've never edited video footage in my life, but I just picked up some great software (Sony Vegas) and am starting to learn it bit by bit. And when I say "learn it" I mean "fiddle around with all the commands until something works or something breaks, but whatever you do, do not read the instructions!" Hope you enjoy the looped footage with excessive use of cheezy filters! Hollywood, here I come!

And on an unrelated note, the new Extreme Beverage Testers vs. The 2006 Jones Soda Valentine Pack article is now up, so be sure to check it out!


Jones Soda Valentine’s Day Packs!

I guess this shouldn't come as too much of a surprise, but I can't help but be excited. Jones Soda has just announced their new 2006 Valentine's Day packs! It's not as big as their holiday packs with 5+ flavors, but it's still got some very interesting stuff in it, including Love Potion #9 flavored soda. If nothing else, I'm sure it'll help wash down the flavor of those nasty Valentine's Day Kit Kats.

Jones Soda Valentine's Day packs!

So what do you guys 'n girls think? Would you rather give/receive this new Jones Soda pack or a box of chocolates & flowers? Or, if none of the above, what else would you rather give/receive for V-Day?

And yes, you can expect an in-depth review of the Jones Soda Valentine Pack from
I-Mockery's infamous "Extreme Beverage Testers" in the very near future. In the meantime, however, check out our big Jones Soda features of the past:

-Extreme Beverage Testers vs. Jones Soda's 2005 Halloween Sodas!
-Extreme Beverage Testers vs. Jones Soda's 2005 Regional & National Holiday Packs!


What the hell did they do to my Kit Kats!?

So I was in the grocery store today, still amazed at how many candies and novelties they already have on the shelves for Valentine's Day, when I stumbled upon something that simply should not exist. Cherry. Flavored. Kit Kats. Look, I'm all for having fun with the seasonal candies 'n stuff, and sometimes they'll release someone new that really does taste good. But cherry flavored white chocolate Kit Kats? No thanks. Actually, I was sure that these would pique your curiosity, perhaps even sound tasty to a few of you sickos... so I picked up a package for myself to prove to you just how bad these things are and hopefully prevent you from wasting your cash on 'em.

Valentine's Day Kit Kats!? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

First off, you can't make the package for one the greatest candies on earth pink. I don't give a damn if it's Valentine's Day or not. Why not make it red? Red as the blood draining from an ex-lover who cheated on you. Yeah, now that's how you celebrate Valentine's Day in style! But pink? Come on. They're thin candy strips and now they come in a pink package? Some poor woman is gonna mistake these things for pregnancy tests now. And while I do condone pissing all over this new flavor, it'll hardly give you ladies accurate results if you're hoping to find out whether or not you have an alien growing in your belly.

Disgusting pink crap

Upon opening the package, you're hit with a smell that you simply cannot deny: "Hey! That smells like cherry cough syrup!" Yeah, I like cherries as much as the next guy, but there's nothing worse than the fake cherry flavors that they tried to trick us into tasting when we were kids just so we'd take the medicine. And damnit, they've made the Kit Kats themselves pink too. Blasphemy I say, blasphemy! So I gave the thing a taste, and sure enough, it was awful. These aren't the fantastic mint Kit Kats that came out not too long ago, these are their evil cousins who are determined to go to war with your tastebuds. I'm going to save these things for next Halloween and give them to any kids that show up at my door without costumes asking for candy. That's how awful they are. Try them if you like, but I'm sure you'll be wishing you bought that package o' mint flavored Kit Kats instead.

And on one last semi-related note: Am I the only one who was extremely disturbed when he saw Valentine's Day goods in the stores the day after xmas? If they put those candies out any earlier, they'd be expired before Valentine's Day even arrived. Now there's a great present to give to the one you love - a trip to the hospital for some stomach-pumping action!


Mario Kart DS

So I've been playing Mario Kart DS far more than I probably should be playing it. So much in fact that I beat the entire game, including the 150cc Mirror Mode levels. I remember when I first started playing the game that those levels seemed like a dream that I'd never actually get to see, but somehow I pulled it off. Waiting for my computer to finish defragging or finishing a virus scan helps, because when it's doing that I can always get in a good number o' games.

Cool thing about the game, like many others, is that it allows you to unlock new characters and new karts if you win enough. Dry Bones is probably my favorite character to play as, because he's always clanking his bones around and doesn't make some high-shrilled yelp like some characters do whenever they pass by another kart. But one unlockable character really caught me by surprise...

R.O.B. the Robot in Mario Kart DS! :o

R.O.B. the Robot - the robotic controller from the original Nintendo Entertainment System! He's a really fun character to play as too since he can pretty much manhandle any of the other characters. So yeah, that's easily one of the best unlockables I've ever seen. Anyway, since I just beat the entire game, you get to see the alternate ending screen (they only show this one if you beat all of the courses with a gold medal):

Alternate Ending! :o

Nothing too exciting really, but it was worth playing through all that stuff just to unlock R.O.B. and all of the additional karts.

I've been playing online a bunch using the Nintendo DS WiFi connection. Do any of you have a DS? If so, be sure to post your Mario Kart DS friend codes here and I'll add you to my list. Already been playing a bunch of people from the I-Mockery forums and having a blast in those games, so I hope to see some of you in an online game too!

Here's my Mario Kart DS friend code: 352249-905076


New York, New York…

So for our Christmas break, we decided to go up north to visit some family in upstate New York (I'm from NY in case I haven't mentioned it before). It was a long drive all the way up there from Richmond, but Re got me an iPod player for my car which made the trip go by real quickly. I always love leaving that thing on shuffle-mode to see what comes on next. One minute we'll be listening to a peaceful track from the Royal Tenenbaums soundtrack, the next minute it'll be playing Lamb of God. It's always amusing when the music playing goes from one extreme to another like that.

Was real glad to be able to visit my sister while I was up there, even though it was only for a short time. She's the one who got all the smart genes, so naturally she works in the medical field. Her job seems pretty crazy as she'll get paged at 4 in the morning to work on harvesting organs and tissues from the recently deceased. I couldn't even make myself wake up at 4am, let alone take a flight out into the middle of nowhere to cut up some bodies. Ah well, if you live in upstate New York and you're an organ donor and you die soon... chances are my sister will be working on you.

So after we were done hanging out in upstate New York, we went down to NYC to stay for a night. We decided to pamper ourselves for this one night and stay at a real nice hotel, check out the view we had:

A room with one hell of a view!
That's the actual view we had from our window.

The place was really nice 'n all, but the prices of some stuff just makes me laugh. It's like rich people have nothing better to do with their money so they'll just piss it away on things. For example, a snack pack of pretzels that would normally cost 50 cents from any regular vending machine was being sold for $2.50 at the hotel. If you wanted a bowl of corn flakes, that'd run you $5.00 (pending you didn't want to add in bananas or berries). But the most absurdly priced food item was the one that was in our room when we first arrived:

Uh, no thanks, I'll drink from the garden hose!

No thanks, I think I'd drink from the garden hose or the toilet before I spent SEVEN DOLLARS on a small bottle of water. And I love how they promote it like it's being provided as a "service" to their guests. Yeah, you're doing us guests a real favor. 7 bux for a bottle of water? What a deal!

Well anyway, we went walking around NYC for a while. Went to Brooklyn, Queens, and my personal favorite area... St. Mark's Place. Tons of great shops to be found in that area. I'd probably consider moving there if it didn't cost an arm and a leg (or the equivalent of a bottle of water from our hotel) to do so. After that, we went back down to Philly, which I already talked about in my previous post. All in all, a fine trip and the break from staring at my computer screen wasn't nearly long enough.

In other news... I'm sure that you've all seen the trailer for our new game by now...


Yes indeed, PickleMan is going to be I-Mockery's next big flash game. While that trailer is just a little teaser I made (which still took an assload of time to finish, as does everything in Flash) I figured I'd shed a little bit of light on the game. First off, it's going to be huge. We want to make this one of the biggest flash games you'll ever encounter on the internet. Far bigger than the Domo-Kun's Angry Smashfest game we did a while back, which was a huge game in itself.

This time, there's three of us working on the game instead of two:

All of us having 3-letter names... it must be destiny. o.O

The game is a long way from being finished even though we have a lot of stuff already created. I can't tell you how awesome of a job PoX is doing on the Pickleman sprites. What I can tell you is that this game is going to be fun as hell. Much like the Domo-Kun game, the PickleMan game will have plenty of nods to the games of yesteryear, loads o' humor and gobs o' violence. We'll be unveiling more about the game as the months go by including screenshots and eventually a second trailer with some footage from the actual game. We might even put out a demo at some point, but I'm not making any promises. Right now all I care about is creating the best game we possibly can.

Anyway, lemme know what you all think about the teaser trailer and the idea of a PickleMan game!