I'm sure by now, you've all been huddled in a corner, naked and quivering while cursing the heavens for not providing you with weekly updates to your beloved I-Mockery. Well, shout as you may, the blame lies not within the skies, but within our simply going away on a vacation for the past week. We went to Nags Head, North Carolina with some friends (including Proto) and had a hell of a good time relaxing in the sun. I'll share more details and a few photos of it later on, but for now, I'm still trying to get my mind wrapped around the fact that I'm no longer on vacation. Sure, my body is back at home, but my mind is still on a beach where red jellyfish are washing up on the shore and there's hardly anybody else to be seen for miles.
Not in a gay way, mind you, but he is one of my childhood heroes and favorite characters ever. So as you can imagine, I'm really looking forward to the upcoming Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, despite it's terrible, terrible title. But the problem is that George Lucas is involved, and he let us down big time with the Star Wars prequels. So I don't exactly trust him, you see. However, the good news is that Steven Spielberg is also involved, and though he's done some crappy movies in his day, his track record is WAY better than Lucas's.
Much as I welcome the idea of having more Indy adventures to watch, I'd almost prefer they left well enough alone. The original trilogy is fucking fantastic, and The Last Crusade ended things so damned well, I have a hard time believing that this new one could provide a halfway satisfying conclusion to the whole series. It's almost bound to disappoint, given the sheer perfection of Raiders of the Lost Ark and Last Crusade, and the not-too-shabby-though-not-quite-as-good Temple of Doom. It's pretty much impossible to top the first or third movie, and when you go out on such a great high note as they did, it's usually a bad idea to keep doing more, especially after so much time has gone by.
So I'm trying to keep myself from having ANY expectations at all about this new film in an effort to avoid being disappointed. I don't think for one minute it will be as good as Raiders or Crusade, but can it match Temple? It might. That's my sincere hope, anyway. Maybe if I keep telling myself "George Lucas is the man behind Jar Jar Binks" over and over again, I'll start to think the movie will suck, and then even if it's just "okay" I'll still be fairly happy with it. (Plus, it has Cate Blanchett in it, who I am totally in lurve with).
What are you guys' thoughts about the new movie? Do you have hope that it will live up to the previous adventures, or do you think Indy's time is past? Also, I'm curious: what's your favorite film in the series? It's a very tough choice for me between Raiders and Crusade, but I think Crusade just barely edges out over Raiders for me, because the interaction between Harrison Ford and Sean Connery is so much fun to watch. Indy works really well when he has a sidekick to play off of, and that was the one thing he lacked in the first film. I'm also curious to know how many Temple fans are out there. Don't get me wrong, it's a fine movie, but I think the annoyingness of Willie Scott kind of drags it down a few notches as compared to the other two.
NOTE: Protoclown wrote these words two days prior to their posting, before having seen the movie, which he has just returned from. And boy, does he have things to say about it, boy does he ever. But he is going to wait and post a weekly movie review about it next week, rather than discussing it here. This post is more about the "before". The "after" comes later. Protoclown has also just realized it is three in the morning, and he is writing about himself in the third person. God, what a douchebag.
Gentle reader, tomorrow at around 1:35 pm I will be forty-six years old. In any case that’s how it is with me as I type these words. By the time they are posted my birthday may be in process, or have come and gone. By the time you read this, who knows how old I’ll be, if I’m alive at all? Or maybe you’ll never read this, in which case I shall be immortal.
The demographics of the fine web site you are now enjoying suggest that I am your elder, in most cases by a good number of years. Many of you have parents younger than I, which I imagine makes all three of us shudder, unless you are my offspring, in which case the number shuddering would be two. Or four and three respectively if you join us in shuddering. (more...)
Yesterday I posted about those intriguing black packaged Hot Wheels "Mystery" cars. The first one I received wasn't anything that amazing or anything, but it's all about the packaging, and I was hoping for better luck next time. Sure, these mystery cars aren't quite as fascinating as the Doritos X-13D Flavor Experiment, what with that dangerous looking black bag 'n all, but the car shrouded in black plastic mystery was still enough to get me to shell out 99 cents... times two!
Well anywho, as promised for today, here's what I got in my second Hot Wheels "Mystery" car pack: (more...)
So I was walking around the toy aisles of Target the other day, like any grown man should, and I noticed a strange Hot Wheels package out of the corner of my eye. Normally, I barely even pay any attention to Hot Wheels since I generally don't give a damn about cars, but the solid black packaging drew my eyes in like a magnet. Hot Wheels "Mystery" cars??? It took all of about two seconds to realize I would be buying this thing immediately because I'm a total sucker for any kind of "mystery" items where you don't know what you're going to get. I've already posted evidence of this in the past with the Mystery Surprise Grab Bags from the dollar store. I've also posted about another form of mysterious automobiles from Matchbox in the form of Coal Cars. Those things came with a nice lump of coal to keep them in though, and these latest "Mystery" cars don't come with anything of the sort, so the cars themselves have a lot to live up to. After all, when something costs a whopping 99 cents like these mystery cars do, you expect it to be of the utmost premium quality, right? Right.
So let's see what I got... (more...)
We were at a video game party not too long ago and I made a costume for it: a scared ghost from Pac-Man. I once dressed up as Pac-Man when I was a kid, and I'll try digging through some old photos sometime to find a picture of it, but I never had a chance to be one of the ghosts. I dunno what it is about 'em, but I always loved how they turned blue with fear whenever Pac-Man ate a power pellet. Now, having worked on countless sprite-based games and comics, I'm extremely anal about making sure everything is absolutely pixel perfect, and making this costume was no different. I measured right down to the pixel an actual Pac-Man ghost and then translated it to the measurements of the large craftboard and foamcore that I would use to make it. Knowing I wouldn't be able to wear it during the entire party without crushing it, I opted to make something that I could later use as a wall decoration. What do you guys think? Personally, I'm really happy with how it turned out, especially since it was a last minute kind of thing that I put together in a day.
But most importantly, my buddy Tom captured one of my performances of "Sabotage" by the Beastie Boys on Rock Band. You can watch me in all my rock star glory after the jump... (more...)
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