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My thoughts on Rob Zombie’s “Halloween”

Halloween season on I-Mockery has officially begun! We'll be packing this site so full o' Halloweeny goodness over the next two months that you'll be puking up zombies and crapping ghosts before you know what hit ya. So how do I want to kick things off in the blog for my favorite time of year? By reviewing the "reimagining" of one of the truly great classics in horror movie history: Halloween.

Allow me to preface this post by saying some things about Rob Zombie's previous work. I really loved a lot of his old music videos and remember being excited when it was announced that he would be writing and directing his first feature horror film. Sadly, House of 1000 Corpses was a big letdown for me. I didn't like much at all about it, and almost walked out of the theater because it was boring me to tears. The Devil's Rejects, however, I thought was a huge step in the right direction and was one of the most entertaining films I had seen in a while at the time. Everything about that movie was great from the improved directing to the well-written script. And hey, it did have Michael Berryman in it too, and that never hurts a horror movie in my book.

So I was on the fence when it came to this new Halloween remake, figuring it had a chance to bring the series back to life (after all, we're talking about a series that recently had Michael Myers stalking Bustah Rhymes during a reality show webcast... doesn't get much worse than that), but it could also continue the trend of awfulness. Either way, I went to check out the new movie with an open mind.

With that out of the way, allow me to share my thoughts on Rob Zombie's "Halloween". I'm sure a good bunch of you won't like what I have to say, but I'm not here to kiss ass, I'm here to tell ya my honest thoughts about this flick. If you haven't seen the movie yet, please know that there are some potential spoilers below.

Evil has a destiny... to fail at the box office and in the hearts of any true horror fan.

Wow. Please tell me this was all an elaborate joke on horror fans. How the hell did this ever get greenlit? This wasn't a reimagining of the original Halloween story, this was a raping of it. Rob Zombie has somehow managed to take one of the most infamously evil horror icons and turn him into a Kane-sized ogre who had a bad childhood. Now I had already mentioned that I had some serious doubts about trying to tell the backstory of Michael Myers because it simply wasn't necessary. Michael's backstory was perfect the way it was in the original when Dr. Loomis explained: "I met this six-year-old child, with this blank, pale, emotionless face and, the blackest eyes... the *devil’s* eyes! I spent eight years trying to reach him, and then another seven trying to keep him locked up because I realized what was living behind that boy’s eyes was purely and simply... evil!" Perfection. All we ever see of Michael Myers as a child in the original is through the eye holes in his mask as he kills his first victim. Then we get that perfectly eerie slow zooming out shot of him standing outside with the bloody knife and a blank stare.

In Rob Zombie's version, we get far more information than that. Instead of Michael just being born of pure evil, Rob has completely fucked up the story by having Michael's evil come as more of a reaction to the household he grew up in. An abusive stepfather who was always insulting him and fighting with his mom, who was of course, a stripper. You can just tell that Rob thought that by adding in a mean stepdad who threw around profanities like they were confetti from the hands of Rip Taylor, that he was making the movie far more shocking. Wrong. The only shocking thing about it was how bad the script was. So as a result of living in such a nerve-racking household, Michael spends his time killing small animals for a while to let out his rage. RAGE! Eventually, he's ready to start killing real people... but instead of making it creepy, Rob just has this kid act out his methodical killings as brutally as he possibly can. Honestly, I thought Macaulay Culkin was more frightening in "The Good Son" than young Michael here... and that movie sucked. I'm a huge fan of blood and gore, as you all know, but that is not what the original Halloween was about nor is that what made it such a classic.

Oh and forget about that creepy zoom-out shot in Rob's version... but hey, we do get to see Michael sulking on the sidewalk while the song "Love Hurts" plays. I shit you not. I'm sure he thought it would be really funny or creative scene, but this isn't like that perfect moment in The Devil's Rejects when they drive towards the cops, guns a' blazin' to the tune of "Freebird". No not at all... this was just pure shit and felt way out of place.

Even worse than that, Rob decided that we all needed to know why Michael Myers wears that mask. Well not just that mask, but apparently a ton of masks. Throughout his childhood, Michael spends his time making a variety of masks to cover up his face. And his reason for doing this? "To hide my ugliness." Well hellooooooooo Gothy McMyers. Nice to meet you. Here, have a box of tissues. Seriously though, why did he feel this was necessary!?

I also hated the new Michael Myers as an adult. Does he really need to be a 7 foot tall behemoth? No, of course not. Rob just doesn't get that one of the coolest things about the old Michael Myers was that while he was of average height and didn't have big muscles or anything, he was still able to overpower anybody because of some evil super-strength he had within. Rob's Michael Myers appears to not have any internal evil powers, but instead relies on the same brute strength that any extremely tall big guy with a temper would have. Again, this really detracts from the infamous Michael Myers persona. It also doesn't help that you can hear him grunting like a perverted old man sometimes when he's manhandling his victims. Michael Myers is a silent evil... I didn't need to hear him talking as a kid and I didn't need to hear his man-grunts.

I also didn't like some of the choices Rob made for who would be playing certain characters. Don't get me wrong, I've always liked Malcolm McDowell and think he's a badass, but he just didn't do much for the role of Dr. Samuel Loomis that the late Donald Pleasance acted out so perfectly. Pleasance was greatly responsible for making Michael seem all the more evil... you could just tell how weary he was from all the years of trying to get through to him and how responsible he felt for Michael. In Rob's version, McDowell just seems more surprised and panicky throughout the film with far less emotion invested in his ex-patient. Then again, when you consider the script he had to work with, that probably explains a lot. The other person I didn't need to see again was Sheri Moon. Look Rob, I know she's your wife 'n all, but you don't need to put her in every single thing you do. But if you must, at the very least, don't give her such prominent roles like the mother of Michael Myers. It's not going to help her career when most people think the only reason she has one is because she's married to you. Oh, and you also don't have to have her shaking her ass on the goddamned screen in every movie either. Lemme tell ya, that ass-shakin' really helped me understand the rage within young Michael Myers.

And speaking of ass, that's probably the most fitting word I can think of to describe the ending of this movie. After literally giving the girl a football tackle out of a window, she somehow lands on top of him, grabs a gun and presumably shoots him in the face. I say presumably because they don't actually show it, they just show her point the gun, squeeze the trigger and then get splattered with blood while we have to endure more of her annoying screams. Then it simply cuts to a black screen and we're all left sitting in our chairs wondering... WHY?

Wanna know what truly shows how bad this movie was though? Not a SINGLE moment in the movie made me (or anybody else in the theater for that matter) jump in the slightest bit. Many of them were laughing at how bad and cheesy it was throughout the film. When the credits rolled, a few people clapped while many people booed. Now I'm sure a lot of you are thinking, "Oh he just grew up on those movies, so that's why he hates this one so much." No, that's really not the case here at all. There have been quite a few remakes that I thought were handled really well - "Dawn of the Dead" for example. As much as I wanted to enjoy it, this new Halloween movie just didn't have anything going for it. If you're looking for the real "Halloween" experience, then stick with the original. If you're looking to substitute the ominous Michael Myers persona with far more noise and T&A, then go with Rob Zombie's version.

But just to show you that it wasn't my nostalgia getting the better of me, most of the people in the crowd that were booing at the end? Yeah... they were teenagers. Teenagers who I assume were the real demographic Zombie was hoping to please, and while I'm sure there are some out there who absolutely loved this movie, I was glad to see that many of them recognized the fact that they just watched pure-unfiltered shit.

There were only two good points I could come up with regarding this movie:

1) Micky Dolenz' (from The Monkees) brief cameo as a gun salesman. I really wanted to see this scene go on longer, and I suspect there is more footage out there that will be saved for the DVD release (including the alternate ending), but I'll be damned if I'm gonna buy it because nothing can save this flick.

2) Michael Myers' mask looks much better than it has in quite a while. I'm sure Captain Kirk would approve.

As nice of a guy as he seems to be and as big of a horror fan as he is, Rob Zombie has completely failed to "get" what made Halloween so great. It was the enigma that was Michael Myers. Very little about him was explained, he simply was evil through and through. This made his undying rage seem all the more potent and real. Zombie screwed it up by giving too many reasons for his anger... a troubled childhood and an emo outlook on his life.

One critic wrote the following about Rob Zombie's new "Halloween" movie and I think he summed it up best: "John Carpenter can rest easy; any self-respecting horror fan will forget this film even exists by the time the real Halloween rolls around this year."

So for those of you who have seen it already, what'd you think?

72 comments

Guest

Misdemonar (Guest) on 09/03/2007 2:38 am

You forgot to say that ken foree was in it :o



Guest

Jesse B (Guest) on 09/03/2007 2:39 am

Ah, Halloween. That time of the year... FOR COUNT POP!

Anyway, I have only one thing to say about the Zombie Halloween.

I SEEn IT
I CAN'T UNSEEN IT



Guest

Jen (Guest) on 09/03/2007 2:53 am

Bloody Rob Zombie. I haven't seen it, and I doubt I WILL see it.
Oh, and I'm hoping you've invited Count Pop along. My little sister loves him.



Guest

Emilio (Guest) on 09/03/2007 3:02 am

I thought it was pretty damn good, but then again I have never been a big fan of the Halloween series...



Guest

James (Guest) on 09/03/2007 6:29 am

Rob zombie needs to stop making movies, for the sake of all that is good and pure in this world.



Guest

Russ (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:09 am

There's a small breed of people that can sense things that obviously suck, for lack of a better word. Rog, you are the president of this legion. For the movie, once mike was grown up the movie was pretty good, but the first 45 mins or so...wow...just...wow.
Read this recent bulletin i posted on myspace, its for the better.
"And as far as the new Halloween movie goes...
Well my buddy Rog couldn't of stolen the words out of my head better. In a nut shell.
The first 45 mins were horrible, zombie's obvious, lame, saying the work fuck ever 0.143 of a second directing, short of sitting on a pile of nails, wanted me to walk out of that theater faster then fast. And thats fast.
His wife can't act and everyone who i've seen in all his other movies paints the picture that im watcing a movie already made, GET NEW FRIENDS ROB AND PUT THEM IN MOVIES, ITS CALLED ROTATION. Showing mike growing up, wearing a Kiss shirt, talking way to much, talking like a girl, cusing, killing animals completely kills the mood that Micheal Myers is supposed to set, i could give smaller examples but read this, its quite accurate. But after the first 45 mins or so, once mike's grown up, the rest of it was pretty damn good.
http://www.i-mockery.com/blabber/"



Guest

Russ (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:15 am

Another thing, myers being big, i didn't like, him being regular sized made it interesting cause he still had great strengh. Jason, now he works being so big *after Friday the 13th part 5, well in part 6 he wasn't big but was snapping necks like a contest was to be won* Anyways, jason being so big, once jason 'dies'...again, 'after part 5' he's more of a monster, butcher...er killer...er. While myers stayed calm, quite, more shadow like 'the shape' as they used to call good ol' mike. Anyhow, i could type until it hurts, and i think im starting to cramp.



Guest

Russ (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:25 am

And the choice of acting, quick sum.
-Grown up mike ok, a little to big though.
-Young mike is the ugliest kid i've ever seen,
-Both his parents are terrrible.
-New loomis was horrible, McDowell looks like an out of work mall santa clause,
-New lorie strode was an advrage spoiled slutty voice that could break glass girl.
-Lorie Strodes friends, ann, i dont know if anyone got this but that was the actress that played lorie strodes daughter in 4 @ 5. That's why they gave her a fairly decent part in the movie. I'm guessin.
-The one and basicly only new roll that was pretty good. Tommy Doyle, agree?



Guest

Mighty Pinto (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:55 am

Yes, this film was ass. I made sure the whole theater knew it was ass by screaming "ASS" at the top of my lungs the minute Rob's name appeared in the credits. Maybe if he made a feature out of "Werewolf Women of the SS" instead of this drivel I might have been more sympathetic; but no. Total ass.



Guest

Protoclown (Guest) on 09/03/2007 10:16 am

Man, I told ya you should've seen Superbad instead. :P



Guest

Ty22 (Guest) on 09/03/2007 10:45 am



Guest

MEK (Guest) on 09/03/2007 11:07 am

JASON FTW!
I haven't seen any of the Hallowenn movies, but I sure wish they'd go ahead and make Freddy vs. Jason Vs. Mike Myers (Austin Powers) vs. Michael Myers vs. Ash.
Ash would have to win of course by teaming up with Jason.
Oh and COUNT POP can make a cameo too ;p



Guest

Ian (Guest) on 09/03/2007 11:54 am

Hey ROG couldnt agree more. I saw it and i thought it was good and then i woke up and said what the fuck happened to Halloween. ROB ZOMBIE killed Dr Loomis thats just weak.



Guest

Dr. Jackson (Guest) on 09/03/2007 1:43 pm

I'M BIG JOE GRIZZLY BITCH! Yeah this movie sucked, I'm 16, but have been a fan of the original since I was young, and hated this movie.



Guest

Tim (Guest) on 09/03/2007 3:02 pm

I haven't seen it, I know not to though.

I wouldn't buy a music CD that John Carpenter or Wes Craven did would I? So why would I buy a movie by Rob Zombie? Just because his name has a horror staple in it doesn't mean he is good at making horror movies. If that were all it took I would just change my name to "Tim Sex" and be done with it :P



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 09/03/2007 3:12 pm

Jesse B, Jen and MEK, hehe yeah I'm sure ol' Count Pop will make another appearance this season. Who knows what kind o' rockabilly rascality he'll get into this time around!

Russ, eh... can't say Tommy made much of an impression on me, nor did the 2nd half of the movie.

Tim, uh John Carpenter created most of the music for his movies including the infamous Halloween theme song. I would gladly buy a CD that he made. That guy was a jack of all trades...



Guest

DistantJ (Guest) on 09/03/2007 4:01 pm

Personally I'm with the 'dumbass average moviegoer' crowd, because I freaking loved every second of it.



Guest

BurnPianoBurn (Guest) on 09/03/2007 4:30 pm

I honestly thought it was decent. I've been a big Halloween fan for a while. Minus H20 and Bustaween.

Positives:
-Tyler Mane was perfect for this role. I think I would be more afraid of a guy who could tear my arms off than a guy who is about 6'2 (Tony Moran). I loved how he just shrugged along the hospital in the orange mask and just slaughtered the deadwood prick (who is a complete asshole during interviews - I know personally from interviewing him at his hometown radio station). At least they didnt cast someone like Brad Pitt for Myers or like some other stupid high profile actor.
-High School boobs. Felt like your classic slasher flick with all the high school tits.
-Kill after Kill, there was a better kill ratio in this one.
- The Mask was better looking
- It still had that Halloween feel to it, yet it had the zombie twist. I didnt jump in any of Zombie's movies, but I still enjoyed them in an artistic sense that they felt like an old White Zombie video.
- Kept the same cast from previous Zombie movies.
-Danny Effin Trejo. It could be a movie with a wooden block sitting in a room while paint was drying on a wall, but put Danny Trejo in it and the movie is Golden. Sure he didnt do much, but he was in it and that made the movie awesome for me.
-Danny Trejo. That's right He gets two mentions for his awesomeness. He wasn't even afraid of Myers, cause that's how badass he is.

Negatives:
- The time lapse. It took place like in the late 70's, 15 years later comes, these kids are talking on 2006 Nokia/LG Cell Phones and dressed to current fashion. In the 80's early 90's I don't recall kids not going to school without flat tops, lightning bolts shaved in their heads, slap bracelets, or living like Saved by the Bell/90210.
- Not enough Danny Trejo. Nuff said, they should have just had him kill Michael Myers in the end with a Knife or his mustache.
- Ackwardness of seeing these highschool girls having sex. I'm 25, and I felt dirty when ol' sheriffs daughter was shouting for the abercrombie kid to "eff" her.
- Abercombie kid, he just needed to pop his collar and it would have been official that he was a douche even though it was pretty much stated.
- Little Freckled face girl. Her scream was about as annoying as a dog pissing on my face while forced to listen to Bjork. They could have picked a cuter kid or one that was less annoying to babysit.
- Death of Dr. Loomis. But I will say this, that guy was no where near as cool as the original Dr. Loomis (Donald Pleasence) so I was glad he died/presumed dead. And where in the hell was, " I SHOT HIM 6 TIMES!!!!!" that was the greatest line out of all the Halloween movies. The PASSION of Donald Pleasence crying out that he shot Myers 6 times and he wondered away. That was worth an award itself.
-Too long poking through the ceiling with a 2X4. Holy shit I was getting tired of it and chanted Hoooooooooo and USA like Hacksaw Jim Duggin the 2nd time around cause it kept my mind off the destruction of good real estate property.

Overall, I was glad I went and saw it. I'm not in disagreement with ROG, who stated good points, I just enjoyed that it was another Halloween flick that gave a makeover without webcams or busta. It could have been better for the SCARE factor, which hell it basically followed the original minus some plot changes, but then again, horror movies have been going downhill for a long time. The second time I saw it with my fiancee, I actually caught a bunch of things that were cool like posters in the background and other little hidden things.

love you I-Mockery



Guest

Angryhydralisk (Guest) on 09/03/2007 5:56 pm

Dawn of the Dead re-make? Good!? Is it because of that lack of character and over-the-top gore?

Still, I like the original a whole lot better just for all the unintentional hilarity and natural selection. Plus zombies get hit in the face with pies.

Still, this was a good review, and Rob Zombie is the king of filler.



Guest

robert bery (Guest) on 09/03/2007 6:03 pm

Don't be a hata, yo!



Guest

Michael B (Guest) on 09/03/2007 7:10 pm

I found it hard to believe that an older child psychologist such as Loomis could fire a Magnum .357 one handed, or that a high school girl, all beat up and just fallen out a window could fire one as easily as they did



Guest

Rico (Guest) on 09/03/2007 7:33 pm

Honestly, Halloween 2007, Rob Zombie's Halloween, whatever you call it, didn't add much to the franchise. I agree with the earlier point about Michael Myers '07 growing up to be an "unstoppable" 7-foot tall monster. It was annoying because that depiction was really a caricature of current wrestlers with Myers-based gimmicks (WWE's Kane, TNA's Abyss). It may be no coincidence that Tyler Mane, an ex-wrestler, played Myers.

As was already said before, the newly-depicted "backstory" of Myers was cliched to the point that any intended social commentary about bullied kids-becoming-murderers backfired.
Give Rob Zombie credit for attempting to make his mark on a storied franchise. But, although I'm not a fan of his prior work, he should stick to original projects if he wants to be remembered as the next great horror-film director.



Guest

Tricia (Guest) on 09/03/2007 7:48 pm

Thank you! That's what I've been saying. We don't need all that backstory crap, I liked it better to just think of him as pure evil.

I was disgusted when I saw this movie, I'm such a fan of the original. It's a shame though, not many people appreciate a classic. I had this long discussion with my husband after we saw it and pretty much said everything you did! This movie will definitely be forgotten.



Guest

al arellano (Guest) on 09/03/2007 7:53 pm

i saw it the first day it came out and wasnt all that impressed with it. i grew up with the original and saw it on the big screen when it came out. and have seen all the other halloween movies. zombie as others have stated didnt catch the darkness of michael myers and the silence of his evil within. that is what made the movie scary in the first place and what he created was just a swear fest of nothingness. i will wait to see the orginal and its follow ups when halloween comes around in a couple of months.



Guest

Halloween « A Simple Tool (Guest) on 09/03/2007 8:36 pm

[...] September 3, 2007 Halloween Posted by thewedge under sigh , Movies  I was going to write a review of Rob Zombie’s Halloween but I think this dude at I-Mockery says almost exactly what I was planning on writing: Here [...]



Guest

Kryten Syxx (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:05 pm

Rog, after seeing the work print I am totally baffled as to why Rob changed almost every bit of the film that helped it make sense. He litterally when through the original cut and deleted all the scenes that aided in gluing the plot together. The time with Michael and Loomis is shorter. We never see young Michael spiral further into madness and the point where he stops talking.

Hell, even the ending in the work print is different. It has real emotion and doesn't end with little miss Strode turning into John f'ing McClaine! This all smells like Dimension forced him to reshoot everything and throw in as many distracting cameos as possible. Michael's escape scene in the work print doesn't have the lame Devil's Rejects reunion. It was such a wasted effort with all these reshoots.

But, in the end the film did break records and did very well for a R-rated horror flick. That's good for us horror fans and hopefully it will carry over to Hatchet's release this week. And trust me when I say that Adam Green's Hatchet is far superior to Halloween.



Guest

Tetsu Deinonychus (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:24 pm

I just wish they did what I always thought they should do in a Halloween movie.

Cast Mike Myers as Michael Myers!



Guest

-RoG- (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:40 pm

BurnPianoBurn, yeah Trejo is always cool, but I disagree about you saying he wasn't afraid of Michael. I think he just knew to treat him with respect because if he made one wrong move, Michael would snap his neck.

Angryhydralisk, oh believe me, I'm totally with you on the original one too... I just think the remake was entertaining. Gotta love when they're picking off zombies who resemble celebrities just to help pass the time.

robert berry, not hatin' the rob berry, just hatin' the rob zombie version o' the film, G.

Kryten Syxx, yeah I know all about the alternate scenes that were cut out and while they sound more interesting than what was shown in the theatrical version, they by no means would save the movie. They're not going to erase the whole Michael Myers being a product of a white trash family thing, or him being a 7-foot behemoth who tackles people and attacks ceilings with rage.

But yeah, I've heard good things about Hatchet and I'll definitely check it out. We need some better modern horror flicks, that's for sure.



Guest

d (Guest) on 09/03/2007 9:45 pm

i've seen the new one. the original is My Fav horror film, even though it leans more towards the suspense genre, and i'd be willing to bet even money that i'm one of the few here that actually saw the first one, at the theater in 1978. the new one is interesting in its own right, the explorations of the why (as it were) seemed pretty interesting. although it tended drag in the 2nd half and when it did 'pop' it was more flash than substance. the one thing really bugged me was the gore, and i know........zombie likes splatter gore (i loved devils rejects...nice 70's horror homage). one thing about the first one that really worked was that carpenter didnt try to rely on splatter (or much blood at all really) to scare/shock the audience. overall, it was an foray into the myers myth.

also, to the reviewer, i didnt even bother to finish reading your review. the entire 'hello gothy mcmyers' line turned me off completely. Ironic that you committed that statement to 'paper' while railing about bad writing.

keep up the good fight.



Guest

The Squtach (Guest) on 09/03/2007 10:56 pm

I think BurnPianoBurn makes a valid point, Danny Trejo radiates awesomeness. Idea for a sequel, Machete vs. Jason.

I saw it in the theater and when they got to the "Love Hurts" sequence the entire theater was laughing. I'm not sure if their reasons were the same as mine, the sheer absurdity of it, but at least they were laughing. When the credits rolled the theater was booing which pretty much sums up my thoughts on it. And this is coming from a guy who wasn't a huge fan of the original



Guest

BurnPianoBurn (Guest) on 09/03/2007 11:07 pm

Lol ROG, yeah he seemed afraid, but Danny Trejo was not afraid. He actually drank all the water in the sink, they didn't show that when he came too because he was tired and decided to take a nap while michael myers tried to kill him and drinking all that bloody water. Afterwards, Trejo got out of the empty sink, smoked a cigarette, put it out on his forehead, and went to Denny's for a Grand Slam breakfast, cause that's how he ROLLS.

Again though Great Work Rog, I love you guys.



Guest

Si (Guest) on 09/04/2007 12:10 am

Great summary.



Guest

Ruby Stingray (Guest) on 09/04/2007 3:24 am

Thanks for saving me from watching this incredible crapfest! The original had me and my friends afraid to leave the house after we watched it- we were all 17 and it was three in the Afternoon!

It sounds like this got the same pshcho-dribble shafting that stupid git Ang Lee gave the Hulk. It's not enough that the Hulk is pissed off because he survived a radiocative blast that turns him into a monster as geniuses Lee and Kirby envisioned him- no, now he needs an abusive papa, waaaah! I hated that shit. If you're gonna re-make a classic for Pete's sake go tot he original for inspiration.

Mickey Dolenz would be cool to see, though...



Guest

Shadow40000 (Guest) on 09/04/2007 5:24 am

I liked the new Halloween.

: (



Guest

Nowhere (Guest) on 09/04/2007 7:00 am

Yeah...I hated this movie.
Spoilers:

First I saw the workprint, then I saw the real deal. The only main differences from the two are the workprint leaves in the rape scene from michael's escape. You get to see Danielle Harris' boobs during the sex scene(Strange a 30 yr old playing an 18 year old and she was another character in the Halloween universe eh?) and the ending where Michael is about to kill Laurie,then he drops the knife. Dr Loomis says "You did the right thing" and he walks away with Laurie. Then the cops open fire and he falls back onto the ground. But yeah big dissappointment, I'm more of a friday the 13th fan and I know Jason has had more than his share of bad movies, but this one I just couldn't watch.



Guest

boots (Guest) on 09/04/2007 7:54 am

pure shit



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Chris (Guest) on 09/04/2007 11:25 am

I agree with you completely, this movie missed the point so hard it's scary. In fact that's really the only thing scary about it at all.

Michael Myers is so quiet you can't be sure he's even alive, so evil he's evil incarnate, and doesn't care about anything but killing you. He had a normal life and then one day started killing. He then sat completely silent for 20 years before coming back for more. That's what makes him scary.



Guest

Su (Guest) on 09/04/2007 12:26 pm

I could care less about the majority of remakes being made, but when the lovely Hollywood-ians begin venturing into remaking old horror classics, I could just scream.

When I saw the trailer for the remake of "The Haunting," I threw a fit. Same goes for the following remakes of “Psycho,” “Salem’s Lot,” "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" and "Halloween". And all was justly deserved! I know, I know in my heart of hearts, that they're planning on attempting an "Alien" remake or, if anyone happens to stumble across it, a "The Innocents" remake. (I think I'll be minus a TV if that ever happens.)

I don't think these people realize they're not revitalizing our favorites, but rather ripping their sanctity to shreds. And now, every time "Halloween" pops up in a discussion, we're all going to have to proclaim which version we're talking about, for risk of sounding like a douche. And that, my friends, is what one refers to as... a bitch.



Guest

Ben (Guest) on 09/04/2007 2:31 pm

I actually enjoyed the movie. I thought that Zombie created a decent "realistic" feeling to the Michael Myers character. I like how he didn't allow him to survive when struck in the head with a bullet. I think his aim was to create a more human feeling to Michael but still with the best parts of the old Michael. I am sure that I will get cursed out for my review but that is how I saw it.



Guest

murphtall (Guest) on 09/04/2007 4:22 pm

i enjoyed the hell out of the movie. to me, it felt like the making of a serial iller sorta thing. but bi had not seen the original since about 1980 or so when i was just a teen. some one else said its not scarey. well duh! How old are you? i haven bbeen scared at a movie since i was 11.
~KM



Guest

monsterforge (Guest) on 09/04/2007 10:05 pm

Y'see... to me going in and explaining characters that are better left unexplained is kind of a taboo. Did we really gain anything by Lucas going in and telling us Boba Fett's origin? Not really. It was better when we had no idea who he was or where he came from. Would you go in and explain away the charm and enigma that Clint Eastwood's "Man Without a Name" has? Hell no! I wasn't even all that happy back in the day when they tried to explain why Myers was evil... it just works better and is scarier to think that there is no reason at all for pure evil sometimes-- no way to predict or deal with it. When you explain a thing you take its power away.



Guest

J. Tithonus Pednaud (Guest) on 09/05/2007 11:26 am

I saw an advance screening and, ROG, you've hit all the points I wanted to make.

For lack of a better synopsis, Zombie basically created a film that is a black hole of creativity. The movie is a completely pointless husk and brings absolutely nothing to the table. It is as barren as an octogenarian's womb.

I almost wish it was simply akin to the 90's Psycho remake - a shot for shot update. Instead, Zombie's Halloween version of Halloween completely misses the point, adds elements that completely undermine anything remotely horrific and in the process destroys a franchise.

It is Shiva, destroyer of worlds.



Guest

Eric (Guest) on 09/05/2007 12:25 pm

youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o you think halloween was somethin? THIS is MUCH more entertaining.



Guest

Steve (Guest) on 09/05/2007 1:21 pm

Rob zombie should of made (re-invented) Zodiac and should of left this already perfect movie alone. Thumbs down from me big time.



Guest

Maquel (Guest) on 09/05/2007 4:51 pm

eh i enjoyed the film.
i'm a huge fan of the halloween series,
i've seen each and every movie, including
the horrible Busta-extravaganza. i enjoyed
zombie's remake.

and of course it was cheesy. no one
can say that the original, no matter
how amazing it was, was not cheesy as fuck.



Guest

Maquel (Guest) on 09/05/2007 4:58 pm

one last thing..
to everyone on here that hasn't seen the movie,
but is still bitching about it:

shut the fuck up.

alright, i'm done =]



Guest

Seth (Guest) on 09/05/2007 5:13 pm

I completely agree that his wife cannot act and should not be in any movies, should he decide to make any more. RoG, another excellent point man, we do need some excellent modern horror flicks.



Guest

kirk2000 (Guest) on 09/06/2007 10:03 am

RoG, my friend Ryan did a lot of the musical score and sound effects for the movie. He said he had several meetings with Rob where they argued about Carpenter's original theme and how Rob wanted to change it whil Ryan thought it should remain the same. Ryan described Rob as a stubborn and idiotic jackass.



Guest

Uncle Creepy (Guest) on 09/06/2007 12:40 pm

I remember being 13 or so, and making a crappy movie with friends, using a Michael mask and strawberry soda for blood. Little to no suspense, and shit acting. Probably would've gotten better reviews from horror fans.

Just sayin'



Guest

J. Tithonus Pednaud (Guest) on 09/06/2007 2:57 pm

Maquel, the original Halloween was NOT cheesy when it debuted. It appears cheesy today only because its innovations have been beaten into the ground for 25 years - making them cliche.



Guest

Daniel (Guest) on 09/06/2007 3:52 pm

Man, big fan of the site but I have to disagree with pretty much all of the comments. The original Halloween is my favorite horror movie of all time. I really like the new Rob Zombie version. It's easily the best Halloween since part 2. That being said, you can't compare the 2. They are totally different takes on the story. It's almost like walking a fan-fiction version of Halloween. While I prefer the suspense-driven slightly-supernatural version, Rob does well with the more realistic/gorey version.



Guest

Maxilor (Guest) on 09/06/2007 9:56 pm

I'm a guy, but this Movie I have to say had TOO MANY Teenage Breasts.....and thats a Mathematical Equation I cant seem to figure out.



Guest

Pinstripes (Guest) on 09/08/2007 8:46 am

Hey, I didn't grow up on Halloween but even I could see from reading the script this was one hell of a bad idea. Michael was frightening because he was evil with no reason- everything's always scarier with no explanation.



Guest

vyle (Guest) on 09/08/2007 12:41 pm

Wait.....people actually boo movies? Was rob zombie in attendance or something?



Guest

Splint (Guest) on 09/09/2007 12:58 am

Havnt seen the movie yet..
But if its anywhere near as good as Zombies last two movies, it should be good. House and Rejects were simply amazing. Hopefully see it soon.



Guest

Alex (Guest) on 09/09/2007 7:15 pm

I saw this on Saturday, and I was the only one in the theater. I had to go out and ask an employee to get the movie started up.

But like you said Rog, this movie wasn't as good as the original. As the saying goes, "We fear that which we do not understand." and no one really understood John Carpenter's Michael Myers, and that's personally the way I liked it.



Guest

Aks (Guest) on 09/11/2007 12:02 am

Haven't seen it. Don't want to. Had a chance but saw Superbad. :D Should have listened to Protoclown man.



Guest

Drew (Guest) on 09/14/2007 2:02 am

I'm confused with how someone (ie. RoG) could like Devil's Rejects, but not like House of 1000 and the new Halloween. I would say they were equally ridiculous as far a pulling a viewer into the plot. And for the record, I did care whether Busta Rhymes would live or die in that other Halloween... ;)



Guest

penmissile (Guest) on 09/14/2007 4:57 pm

"It also doesn’t help that you can hear him grunting like a perverted old man sometimes when he’s manhandling his victims. Michael Myers is a silent evil… I didn’t need to hear him talking as a kid and I didn’t need to hear his man-grunts."

You also hear his "mangrunts" in the original; check it. They even sound more perverted.



Guest

steve (Guest) on 09/15/2007 7:24 am

I dont believe you understood this movie. i am a halloween fan and carpenter fan of many years. The thing with the original is that , it was a part of that unrealistic machine of even though thier human we can blow him up and 8 sequals later its back. tHIS hALLOWEEN HAS A REALISTIC SPIN. itS JUST A MOVIE STOP TEARING IT APART , EITHER YOU LIKED IT OR YOU DIDNT , THE WORLD IS NOT 1978 . tEENS AND ADULTS WANT THINGS EXPLAINED. pEARL JAM MAYBE OUT OF FAVOR BUT THIER FANS ARE STILL OVER CRITIC STARBUCK DRINKING ASSHOLES....



Guest

Cat (Guest) on 09/16/2007 1:52 pm

I liked it. I just prefer the original. This one didn't have the same feel. It was more gritty and I sorta liked the vague hints o the supernatural in the original.



Guest

ryan (Guest) on 09/17/2007 7:36 pm

ok for the therapist dude you gotta remember that this is his first time seeing michael escape of course hes gonna be panicky, he doesnt know what to do yet...wouldnt you,,he prob wasnt a pro right off the back bro....



Guest

Kris (Guest) on 09/18/2007 12:23 pm

Nothing seemed to "build up" the way that other horror movies of this nature have. There just wasn't any suspense, and it really didn't make me give a shit about the fact that anyone was about to die. The ending purely sucked. I thought it was because I am so used to all these twist endings that they put in movies these days, but I never felt such an empty void at the end of other Halloween movies.

Things I did like: the imagery. Flannel (what, I like grunge rock), candy corn, stuff of halloween nature. BOC don't fear the reaper playing in the background. Cool stuff, didn't save the movie though.

I thought there were far more funny scenes than creepy. My friend and I were laughing our asses off throughout the whole movie. I don't know if any of you guys found it funny, but here are some scenes that made me crack up.

The whole scene with the big grizzly guy. Everytime he slammed against the side of the stall, I could have sworn I heard him say "DAMN!" "SHIT!" "DAMN!" up until the point when he went limp.

In the second half, when Laurie Strodes father forgets his suitcase, his wife yells to him about forgetting it and he comes out of nowhere with "Oh Shit!" in a half-laughing voice. It was just so amazingly awkward. Then when he gets back to the steps with his wife, he mumbles "gimmy some lovin". I just found his character hilarious. Like some miserable, sarcastic office worker who has been drained of all of his life. Only thing that could have made it better would have been to have him going to work with a bottle of jacks in a paper bag.

The caretaker at the cemetery. He just flipped out so bad. Reminded me too much of the scene in "I Heart Huckabees" when that guy just rambles off into "SHIT MOTHERFUCKER COCKSUCKING FUCKING FUCKER!" whenever he gets pissed. Then AS this guy is flipping out, Loomis just up and walks away. Classic.

The funniest scene in the whole movie though, BY FAR, was when the young Myers puts on the extra large shatner mask. I felt like a dick, disrupting the whole theater, but I thought it was comedic genius. The mask just blended in so good, it really looked like this kid had a giant shatner head. It give me a mental image of Henry Rollins's head and neck on a 6 year olds body.



Guest

MEK (Guest) on 09/20/2007 8:18 am

Halloween still just came out here, just saw a coomerical on a bus saying it's came out in the UK on the 18th.
Damn the UK and it's it's slowness of getting things from movies to Super Paper Mario >.



Guest

Eattinbrains (Guest) on 09/21/2007 8:57 pm

meh nothing can save Halloween Moustpha Akkad ruined it with millions of sequels already, and Myers is a lame fuckin bad guy anyway.



Guest

Anna (Guest) on 10/03/2007 3:36 pm

I loved the original movie, but if that's why you're going to see this one, you are in for a RUDE awakening; it really in no way remotely resembles the original. However, if you're going because Rob Zombie made it and you're one of those skanky kids who thrash out to him and Slipknot, then you will probably love it.
I liked the idea of seeing more of Mike's past, but Rob Zombie didn't really add up the equation correctly. I know that being a director is all about adding your own creativity to the screen, but dammit Rob Zombie, it's gotta stop. Why, oh why, do you feel that tits will make a movie scary for me? Especially barely-legal ones. Nope, not so much, you creepy old perv.
Also, it didn't even follow the original storyline, i.e. Mike's parents not being home when he killed Judith, where he got the mask, the effin car he stole from the asylum, or why he was trying to kill Laurie. I was altogether confused, though, about the fact that Mister Zombie "recycled" scenes - kept the original gist, but changed things around so that you were super pissed off.
P.S. If you think that all high school girls act like those three hobags, you will one day be kicked in the balls.
Overall, the idea was great, but it probably should've had a different director/cast/writer/assistant director/producer.



User avatar

Simon Love on 07/10/2008 8:11 pm

Late to the party...just saw it, just now.

Okay, seriously bad movie. really worse than I expected. Funny thing is, I had read Rog's warnings eons ago...did I heed them? noooooo.

Now I come crawling back in shame. Rog, I will worship and trust your every word from now on, as I worship Max Burbank's truthful gospel.



Guest

Cat (Guest) on 09/02/2008 10:30 am

I liked it, though the original is still my favorite. I love that one. I still think my least favorite is H20. As much as I enjoyed LL Cool J in that, I prefered Resurrection. I will also admit to liking III. Halloween is my favorite series.



Guest

Cpt.Falcon (Guest) on 09/02/2008 7:47 pm

Okay, this movie to be summed up in a few words..."utter shit". I myself was a kid who grew in the 90s so it was a little before my time, but, I am an enthusiastic horror film lover and for that matter any decent slasher flick. Rob Zombie practically bent John Carpenter's version over a table and raped it until it was unable to be called Halloween. The only thing I found that I liked that he( as in Rob Zombie) was able to get the girl from Halloween 4 and 5, to be in the cast. I found this to be the only thing that could be considered "Halloween" esque. My sister who had never seen the original enjoyed the movie, and most of my friends thought the movie was decent. I Myself found it to be mostly a bad porno flick with a Halloween theme... I suppose in the end if you'd never ever even heard of the original then this "movie" could be considered enjoyable, but if you have and have actually seen John Carpenter's master piece, don't even waste a single moment in viewing this tragedy of film...



Guest

guest (Guest) on 09/05/2008 9:15 pm

Zombie sure loves his rape scenes, almost as much as George Lucas likes to see his character's hands cut off by glow sticks.



User avatar

Vila on 09/06/2008 3:42 pm

No, James. It is for the sake of all that is evil and unholy in this world.

James (Guest) Rob zombie needs to stop making movies, for the sake of all that is good and pure in this world.



Guest

Andy (Guest) on 10/26/2009 7:44 pm

I completely agree that this movie was trash compared to the original. I was still scared, but if you start with the scariest movie of all time at a 10 and dial it back, it's still a 6. EVERYTHING that was different was less scary. First of all if he's just a kid with emotional problems then he can't survive a gunshot- you can't appeal to reason for his creation then ignore it later. Also, the famous 'as a matter of fact... it was' became 'as a matter of fact.... i believe that it was'- why change it? Idiot.



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