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reeses-pieces-going-bananas

Reese’s Pieces Going Bananas?

by -RoG- on 07/16/2008, 5:36 pm

As if you could draw a better banana character...

I'm sure you're wondering why there's a photo of a banana and a package of Reese's Pieces candies here. Well, in all honesty, I'm still wondering that myself. You see, I bought those Reese's Pieces the other day and something on the back of the package was quickly brought to my attention... (more...)

117 Comments

bad-band-name-trends

Bad Band Name Trends.

by Protoclown on 07/14/2008, 5:27 am

Is there some rule out there that bands named after places must suck? I mean, let's look at a short list here: Boston, Alabama, Chicago, Asia, Kansas, Linkin Park. Those are some seriously sucktastical bands right there. But then you have Europe, who I'm almost willing to say are exempt because their songs are so cheesily awesome. Although since I can only listen to them with a great sense of irony, I suppose it could be argued that they fall into the suck list.

Admittedly, there are a couple bands named after places that I really like, such as Sleater-Kinney, Portishead, or even Joy Division in their first incarnation of Warsaw. But see, those don't really sound like places to me (except for Warsaw, obviously, but they changed their name anyway, so it doesn't matter). (more...)

110 Comments

in-which-i-ponder-the-impact-of-the-pregnant-man-upon-my-life

In Which I Ponder The Impact Of The Pregnant Man Upon My Life.

by Max Burbank on 07/11/2008, 2:20 am

note: That's not Pregnant Man's new baby daughter in the photo. It's Max Burbank.

Gentle reader, the Pregnant Man has given birth. I suppose this means it is no longer correct to call him the ‘Pregnant Man’, that condition having ended with the birth of his daughter. This makes me sad, as I’d come to love the name ‘Pregnant Man’. It was certainly more pleasing than his actual legal name, Thomas Beatie. For a time, I’d hoped he would legally change his name to ‘Pregnant Man’, and not without reason, as Mr. Beatie is known to be in sympathy with changes in identity. Then I could go on calling him ‘Pregnant Man’ or even ‘The Pregnant Man’ (as in ‘The Batman’). Of course I can call him anything I want; ‘Pregnant Man’, ‘Oprah Fodder’ or ‘Sadie’ which is a name I like. No one can stop me. I’d far rather call him any of those than, say, ‘Mister Mom’. People could just call him Mister Beatie, but we all know they won’t. All that, however, is just so much chin music, and not what I wish to discuss. (more...)

58 Comments

ice-breakers-pacs

Ice Breakers PACS.

by -RoG- on 07/09/2008, 1:38 am

They're on closeout, so they MUST taste great!

I've stated many times in the past that one of my favorite things to do at Target is scope out what items they have on closeout. On my most recent visit, I found some Ice Breakers PACS on the food aisle closeout shelf, which obviously means they're fantastic. For those of you who never saw 'em when they were still easy to find in stores, PACS were breath-freshening candies in little pouches that dissolved when you put them on your tongue. They came in Orange and Cool Mint flavors, and while I checked for cool mint, all they had at this Target was orange. I'm guessing the cool mint flavor was the better of the two, because it looks like they had a really hard time getting rid of these orange ones. I dare say I'm the first person to ever purchase the orange flavored ones, take a look: (more...)

66 Comments

obligatory-fourth-of-july-thread

Obligatory Fourth Of July Thread.

by -RoG- on 07/04/2008, 5:12 am

The new American Gladiators have NOTHING on Malibu. He's American as apple pie!

The picture says it all. July 4th is upon us so whether you're living in America or not, I hope you'll all share your plans for the weekend in this thread. As for me, I don't have a whole lot planned for today, just the usual hanging out with some friends. I was actually tempted to track down a copy of the old patriotic horror/comedy movie "Uncle Sam" to help get in a more festive mood, but then I remembered how horrible it was. This wasn't one of those so bad it's good films, it was just 90 minutes of pure ocular agony. But damnit, it had a lenticular cover when it came out, so I was naturally powerless against renting it at least once. Llllllllenticularrrrrrrrr...

On Saturday, however, I'm making a day trip out towards Big Bear Lake to visit a friend and explore the area. I don't know much about the place, so if any of you have suggestions about things to check out there, I'm all ears. It may be an area with a lot of natural beauty, but the first thing that caught my eye is that they have a place called Super Bear Arcade. If there's one place I'm visiting, it's an arcade with the words "Super" and "Bear" in the name. I honestly can't think of a more patriotic way to spend some time this holiday weekend and you can bet your ass I'll return to you with some more details and pics of the joint.

I hope all of you find similarly funtastic ways to distract yourself this weekend. And hey, when you're done sharing your weekend plans in this blog thread, check out some of our Fourth of July articles:

The Underappreciated Art of Firecracker Labels:
http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/firecracker-labels

The Turtle Family Tries to Enjoy a Fourth of July Celebration:
http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/turtles-4th-of-july

Over The Top: An Important Film About Arm Wrestling, Truck Driving, and Love:
http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/over-the-top
(hey, it's the most American movie I've ever reviewed)

Now get out there and celebrate with some explosives or whatever floats your boat, because Malibu loves you.

19 Comments

why-the-virtual-console-makes-me-sad

Why The Virtual Console Makes Me Sad.

by Protoclown on 07/01/2008, 1:43 pm

I remember when the Virtual Console for the Nintendo Wii was announced, wherein a bunch of classic games would be downloadable not just for earlier incarnations for Nintendo's game consoles, but for the SEGA, Turbo-Grafx, and Neo-Geo systems as well, it seemed like a very promising idea. Not only would I get to replay some of the awesome games I enjoyed in my youth (that my parents sold at a yard sale without telling me when I went off to college), but I would finally get to play many of the games that I'd never had a chance to play (thanks to never owning anything but an NES back in the day). I'd played some SNES and Genesis games over at friends' houses, but I never really had the chance to explore them in depth. So this Virtual Console was an ass kicking idea that should be one of the best things about owning a Wii, right? (more...)

85 Comments

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